Post-grunge

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 21:02, May 26, 2012 by Gabriel Turner (talk | contribs)

Jump to: navigation, search
Bouncywikilogo4
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia think they have an article about Post-grunge.

The term Post-grunge refers to the political state of the continent of Wickomaina following the fall of the Grunge empire at the end of the 1990s.

It has been popular from 1991 to eternity.

Pregrungian Era

Beachbums

Foo Fighters performing an acoustic show.

The time preceding the Grungian Empire consisted of strange creatures such as Phil Collins and George Michaels. These creatures spured a movement across the land, in which barbarian hordes of Newromanitcs ran across the closed tundra of Tennessee like a Flock of Seagulls. It was a horrifying sight for passerbys Nirvana and Soundgarden, who cried in their wake. Thousands and thousands of Creed followers fell in their wake, with arms wide open. With one last breath, the last remaining follower resigned, and were given a soft push from behind by Matchbox twenty. Into this, the the Post Grungian Empire was forged.

History

In the late 1980s, the small Wickomania state called Nirvana was established in the Seattle district of Wickomania, under the rule of President Kurt Cobain. For a few years, Nirvana was simply another independent country in the Wickomanian continent.

Then, in 1991, Nirvana offered a treaty, entitled Smells Like Teen Spirit, that gave them the control over most other governments in the continent. By 1992, they had control over 97% of the continent's area. By 1993, they had merged the government of Nirvana with a couple other governments, such as Alice in Chains and Pearl Jam, to form the Grunge Empire of Wickomania.

The benevolent government was going well, and most Grunge Empire citizens were happy with the government's rule. But back up in the state of Nirvana, all was not well. Emperor Cobain's wife, Madam Courtney Love, wanted a share of the government, but Cobain would not surrender any to her. In April 1994, Emperor Cobain was brutally murdered at the hands of his lover.

The Empire fell into chaos, split apart by roving bands of militants such as Alice in Chains and Soundgarden. Though the chaos seemed to overtake the land, there was hope. A man, a hero, by the name of Dave Grohl, arrived, with drum sticks in hand. He declared his secret relationship with the former Emperor Cobain, and stated at the top of his voice, "It's times like these you learn to live again!" Thus, the Foo Fighters were formed in the year of Our Lord, 1995.

Before long, Alice in Chains and Soundgarden were no more. The Empire governments folded, Grohl took up the helm. Grunge was defeated. In the ashes lay a newborn baby, small but mighty. This is how it came to be that the Grunge Empire fell to Post-Grunge.

...Except Pearl Jam, which remained in a delusional state over much of the Grungian Empire. Grohl dismissed their existance as futile. They still exist to this day.

There are rumors that there existed secret Grunge nations, including one made of honey and hidden in the mud who's leader was responsible for Grunge. There also exists a Sludge Kingdom formed in the Pre-Grungian era, ruled by King Buzzo, it is rumored that Emperor Cobain's government was a rip-off of theirs and that Emperor Cobain's Spells Like Teen Spirit treaty was pretty much a rip-off of a treaty created by a group of magical Pixies, Emperor Cobain has even attempted to this in secret documents his follows would like to ignore.

Rumours have also started of a return of the Grunge empire, kinda like Star Wars.

Major Post-Grunge nations today

  • Foo Fighters — the original post-Grunge nation under president Dave Grohl. They suck.
  • Creed — a post-grunge originally led by Scott Stapp, but his anger led to the crumbling of the nation years later. The nation was really religious. The nation has since reformed under a new leader found in an alter under a bridge.
  • Audioslave — a post-Grunge alliance formed by president Chris Cornell and former soldiers from Rage Against the Machine. The alliance was recently canceled as soldiers of RATM awakened and returned back to their original master after Chris Cornell resigned.
  • 3 Doors Down — a Post-Grunge nation in which Kryptonite is mined.
  • Three Days Grace — a Post-Grunge nation composed entirely of Canadians who sing like Justin Bieber.
  • 3 Doors Grace
  • Three Days Down
  • Breaking Benjamin — a Post-Grunge alliance formed by President Ben Burnley who likes to break stuff.
  • Saliva-Apparantly good but are only known for doing wrestling themes
  • Seether they Fake It
  • Puddle Of Mudd - A Post-Grunge colony populated by schizophrenic psychos
  • Theory of a Deadman - A Post-Grunge nation founded by President Tyler Connolly.
  • Nickelback - A Post-Grunge nation founded by Chad Kroger, basically the white male version of Soulja Boy. They use FL Studio and Pro Tools for everything they do.

Other Political systems since the fall of the Empire

(Man, that heading is a mouthful!)

The fall of the Grunge Empire also paved the way for other (uneffective, brutal, and non-sensical) political systems in the areas surrounding Wickomania, such as pop-punk and nu metal. An intellectural continent known as indie was forming in the early 21st century, supposedly the "smartest" continent on Earth.

See Also

Personal tools
projects