Portal:Music

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Music portal.

By far the most musical portal you will ever find.



Sound-of-music

To understand music, we must first understand sound. Sound is an ingredient used to make tuna casserole. (It is disputed whether sound is sweet or savory.) Sound is alive. The hills are alive with it. Just ask Julie Andrews. She loves the sound of farting.

I love music. Sweet or savory music. Any kind of music. As long as it's groovy. And rock - it has to be rock....and it has to be straight....and it has to be from San Francisco...no wait, I don't like music. I hate music. It sounds like my dog farting. Really eggy. I'm more of a cat person.

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Highlighted Article

Peel-2
National Treasure John Peel on wonderful Radio Caroline.

"Wugga, wugga and welcome back the Perfumed Garden Psychedelic Special hastily assembled because Dave Lee Travis appears to have fallen overboard and been harpooned by whalers. In the finest traditions of Pirate Radio I'm wearing an eye-patch and cutlass and you may be able to hear my parrot Syd squawking in the background. But tonight's show is brought to you live from my living room at Peel Towers due to car trouble stopping me getting to the ferry out to good old Radio Caroline. Let's hope the rozzers don't nick me! I say car trouble; I mean of course that the inside smells so badly of fish that it's impossible to spend more than a minute inside without gagging - a bit like attending a Peter, Paul and Mary gig. Actually, I'm fairly certain that Tony Blackburn has nailed a mackerel somewhere under the dashboard but that's not going to stop me playing the rather excellent "Arnold Layne" by The Pink Floyd.

Archive Article credit: Funnybony (more…)
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Music in the News

Lars Ulrich

At 11:43 last night, authorities were called to a home in California, where Theodore Seville, the drummer of Alvin and the Chipmunks, was found overdosed on a mixture of cocaine and sherbert. He was treated in hospital and discharged this morning, but his bandmates were furious and immediately fired him. In a statement, Simon said that "We have always been proud of having no drugs in this band, to the point where we refused to go on tour with The Jonas Brothers. For Theodore to undermine that is disgusting."


Archive Article credit: Zombie gerbil (more…)
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Featured Image

50 Mozart

Is it really him? (A grue just appeared.)

Nominate stuff Image credit: Marinos Image archive
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Featured Artist

John Coltrane-4485
One of Miles' favourite things: Coltrane playing saxophone

Miles Davis was a jazz musician. He played trumpet. People say he's black, but that's because they're part of the predominantly white establishment who wanted to pigeonhole him into one category. Miles doesn't like categories, and he said himself: "I'm all races at once, baby. That's what fusion was all about, don't you know?" Throughout his long career, Miles also redefined jazz humour, by being the most humourless jazz personality to ever have existed. In effect, Miles taught his proteges that it was fine to ignore the audience while playing, not to announce tunes, and even turn your back to them (to be fair, a lot of audiences turned their backs to Miles when he started playing syrupy pop-jazz in the eighties). You might want to classify Miles' humour as "black comedy".…

Archive Article credit: Knucmo2 (more…)
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Lyric of the Week

No, I'm not a stranger Look! I have an umbrella!

~ From the UnTunes song: You can stand under my umbrella (you can also feel my antenna)
(more…)
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Featured UnTunes

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UnTunes     

 
I Like Cats
PLAY>MP3

I Like Cats (The Other White Meat)


I'm what you might call an animal lover

Horses, kangaroos and chimpazees

But dogs and birds and fish don't satisfy me

For cats they are the sweetest, you see.

Chorus:

I like cats with mustard

I like cats with chili cheese

Cat sausages, cat fricassee

Won't you try some cat chili?

I think that cats are great to eat…

Archive Musical credit: Todd Lyons (more…)
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Recent Articles in Music

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Musical Articles by Genre

Classical Country Genres of Music Hip Hop / Rap


Jazz Popular / R&B Rock (General) Other Musical Articles
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The Beatles
John Lennon | Sir Paul McCartney | Sir Pete Best | George Harrison | Ringo Starr | The Fifth Beatle | Sir Yoko Ono
Albums
Thank Thank You (1962) | A Hard Gay's Night (1964) | Beatles For Sail (1964) | Hell! (1965) | Revolter (1966) | Revolver (1966) | Sgt. Lt. Pepper's Only Lonely Hearts Club Bandana (1967) | Ringo Needs Some Money (1967) | Tragical Mystery Tour (1967) | The Beatles: Ecological Number Ones (1968) | The White Album (1968) | Yellow Sub Machine (1969) | Crabby Road (1969) | Let It Be (1970)
Related articles
Beatlefication | Beatlemania | The Beatles In India | British Invasion | Liverpool | Paul is dead | McCartneyism | The Revolution: A history | Maxwell Edison | BBC | Beatles About | The Beatles Tribute Band | Mark David Chapman | UnNews:John Lennon denied resurrection for fourth time | The Rutles
Notable Songs
Back in the U.S.S.R. | Hey Jude | I Am the Walrus | Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds | Why?:Don't we do it in the road? |
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