Soft drink
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A Soft Drink is a dangerous substance that could induce 'sobering up'. This dangerous condition can cause heightening of reality, inability to talk like a drunk, and makes women appear as ugly as they are. Such drinks need to be consumed with caution, or preferably with vodka.
The addition of alky-hol to any soft drink makes it safe for consumption, and vastly improves the flavor of noxious substances such as kool-aid.
The famous legal case brought against the makers of StinkpopTM in 1982 proved that soft drink consumption does indeed make women impotent. 72 women brought the class action against the company after being unable to produce an erection. They received $100,000 in damages, and Stinkpop was taken off the market. Since then it is mandatory that all soft drinks include the disclaimer "This substance may make your mojo fail".
The subject of Pop versus Soda has arisen many times. However, Oscar Wilde was the one to finally end the debate with his cataclysmic phrase:
“I drank pop once. My abdomen exploded. I wouldn't recommend pop, as I am now abdomenless. Soda, however, is much more clean, environmentally friendly, and can teach your kids how to pay their taxes.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Soda versus Pop
[edit] List of An Anal Probe
Dr. Eggman invented pop. Here is a list of various different types of pop:
- Silk Worm Pop
- Bort Pop with crapped pants
- Old Man's Horrible Breath Pop
- Dandruff Pop of an old man
- King of Poop
- Mammal Walking Having Peculiar Smell Pop
- Dylan's Honey-flavored Sock Pop
- Sunfart Pop
- Armpit and Woopie (A&W) Pop
- ChinaMan Brown Pop
- Drew Lecker pop
- anal probe pop
[edit] List of my ass
- Any food that can be consumed with a straw. e.g. milk, jello, or mashed potatoes
- Any beverage with less than 40% alcoholic content
- A cowardly drink, such as soy milk
- Stored in cans made from recycled Robots.
- American bitches
- Bacon in a Bottle
- Breastmilk
- Coca Cola
- Fecal E.Coli
- Kool-aid
- Mountain Dew, the Nectar of the Gods
- Mosquito semen
- Soylent Green (People)
[edit] See also
- Pop v. Soda
- Pop
- anal probe*Tits
