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SpockPi

Pi is the mathematical version of a rebel. It is what a law-abiding rational number becomes on exposure to drugs, mass false propaganda and/or religion (which is not mutually exclusive to mass false propaganda). A long long time ago, in -300 AD (Also known as 300 BC where BC stands for Before Chickens) a hippie by the name of Euclid decided he should share some of his weed with the number 3. After smoking weed, 3 got high and become irrational. That was how Pi was born, which is 3.141.....

Controversy on the Origins of Pi

There are several conflicting alternative theories on the possible origins of Pi. Some of the more universally accepted ones include:

  • In addition to 3.2, who is the child of 2 and 3(hence its last name is 2, => 3.2), Pi is the secret love-child of 3 and Inifinity. Hence Pi's last name is Infinity, 3.1415.... .
  • Pi was the result of a failed cloning expert involving integers
  • Pi was created by the CIA as an inside agent to watch over all the other irrationals
  • Pi doesn't exist. It is merely a figment of our imaginations.

Questions answered by Mathematicians using Pi

  • Why did the chicken cross the road?

To eat some Pi. Assuming the chicken is spherical, in a vacuum and eggs are conserved in the interaction.

  • What is the answer to life, the universe and everything?

Pi.(It's not 42, the mice lied)

  • Where is waldo?

At home, memorizing the digits of Pi

  • What is the circumference of the observable universe?

A gazillion pies

Questions not answered using Pi

  • What are the first N digits of Pi?

Pi and God

Mathematicians believe that God is actually an array of digits stored somewhere inside Pi. In other words, Pi > God.

Pi to four hundred digits

π is equal to 3.14159 265 35 897 93 23846 264 338 3279 5028841 971 69 39937510 582 0974944 59 23078164 06 286 20899 862 803 4825 3421 170 679 821 480 8651 328 230 6647 093 84 460 95 505 82 23172 535 940 8128 4811174 502 84 10270193 852 1105559 64 46229489 54 930 38196 442 881 0975 6659 334 461 284 756 4823 378 678 3165 2 7120 19091 45 648 56 692 3 4603 48610 45 432 66482 1 3393 60726 02 491 41 273 7 2458 70066 06 315 58817 4 8815 20920 96 282 92 540 9 1715 36436 78 925 90360 0 1133 05305 48 820 46 652 1 3841 46951 94 151 16094

How pi invented time

One day Pi was chilling pool side with his homies, smoking a blunt and discussing the finer points of fried chicken. Suddenly Pi said, "I would certainly like some fried chicken right now." But because time hadn't been invented yet he couldn't move his limbs. He could only move his mouth. So, with his mouth he started making clicking noises, using his tongue and the roof of his mouth. His homies asked him what he was doing and he explained, "I have just invented the first clock!" Suddenly they could all move their arms and legs and thoraxes so they stood up and walked away from the pool. They walked and walked and everywhere they went, time spread. Children who previously could only move their mouths were suddenly able to play and dance and sing. Eventually Pi and his homies arrived at their local fried chicken dispensary and ordered a bunch of chicken and enjoyed it.

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article very remotely related to Pi.