People's Republic of Canada
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
The People's Republic of Oh Canada is a country that is somewhere north of Canada, which separated from the United States of Canada when the latter banned all forms of soft cheese, to the notice of no country currently in existence. It began when the SARS erupted in the real Canada and made all the people of Canada sick and became Chinese. So Everyone named the SARS-affected nation People's Republic of Canada. Then almost everybody in the country died from AIDS because it seemed like a more hip thing to die from than SARS, which stands for Silly Anal-Retentive Stupidity.
The country existed through means of a temporal warp, a piece of string and a bucket of hot curry from the beginning of time. It continued its existence peacefully until Garfield conquered all but a few acres of snow.
Now the entire country is confined to these few acres of snow, currently housing a farmstead run by an old man and a woman who throws cats at passers by at random, however it is claimed the whole area is owned by Oscar Wilde while he was on a whim after having done stuff for a record time (it is not known what this record was).
Invasion from IRAQ
During the late 1990's, Canada was invaded by Iraqi Dictator Saddam Hussein, who just started hanging banners up everywhere around Canada. His response to concerns on his incursion was "Hey, relax man, you need a rest, guy". Eventually Saddam was defeated by the quick thinking of Terrance & Phillip and the use of man's best weapon, farting.
Why does it still exist?
The country still manages to eke its existence through being the location of the Recto-Lube headquarters, which made this decision as it then had to pay no tax as one of its CEOs ran the country. While competitors have wondered at the legitimacy of this and have often hired rabid mercenary monkeys to attempt to conquer the region, the death stare of the head of Lord Byron, taken after his death in a duel with Oscar Wilde, keeps all invaders from making it into the country.
Possible Future Takeover
Mr. Blooby Has announced that he will secretly take over the country buy having the walls torn down with scotch tape. This process will take 15,000 years and will cost 15 cents a roll of tape. However the United Nations have tried to stop Blooby. Blooby has responded by getting drunk with them over a cup of coffee. The takeover will now be postponed until further notice
The Socialist Republic of Canada
Alarmed by the perceived Chinese containment policy against the Soviet Union, of which the People's Republic of Canada appeared to be an example, the Soviets decided to support the dissident Communist Party of Canada. The party subsequently managed to gain control of one half of the People's Republic and eventually proclaimed the Socialist Republic of Canada.
“Why the fuck did I just buy a few acres of snow with the blood of a few American soldiers that were lying around?”
“No way I'm going to look for weapons of mass destruction in this country; it's too damn cold!”
- Oscar Wilde
- United States of Canada
- Recto-Lube: The Brand You Love
- Making up Oscar Wilde quotes
- Asian People
|Countries and territories of North America|
| America: United States of America | Jesusland | Confederate States of America|
Canada: Canada | Canadia | People's Republic of Canada | Canada States
Everyone else: Awesome land | Not So Awesome Land | Barbados | Cuba | Dominican Republic | Haiti | Jamaica | Mexico | Tortuga | Trinidad and Tobago
|Acadia | Bermuda Triangle | Duchy of Björk | British Virgin Islands | Caribbean | Cayman Islands | Greenland | Gulf of Mexico | Martinique | Monkey Island | Orgasm | Pen Island | St. Pierre and Miquelon | Puerto Rico | Québec | Tropico | U.S. Virgin Islands | Wikiland|