Pencil sharpenings
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“This fucking hurts”
~ Pencil on Pencil Sharpenings
Contrary to popular belief, pencil sharpenings did not originate when the pencil did, rather when the pencil sharpener did. It came as a surpise to many people, including Vincent Van Gogh, who replied with his painting, 'Starry, Starry, Pencil Sharpenings.' The pencil sharpenings craze hit off in 1850 after a pile of sharpenings was found in a room after 3000 pencil drawn calendars were issued. Since then, an estimated 519287367299 sharpeners have been sold to produce over 56 tonnes of pencil sharpenings.
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[edit] Life-cycle
Pencil sharpenings are the result of a form of pencilliar mutilation. The pencil is inserted into a sharpener which consists of a metal housing and a blade. The pencil is then rotated to slice of its outer skin. Once the mutilation is complete, the pencil sharpenings are usually placed in a bin, a pencil case, on a Babylonian Altar, inside the lining of suitcases and often thrown into the air at weddings. Once the sharpenings have been collected, they are either recycled or eaten by Woodchucks.xfgddohctrskiloifrrft6kir
[edit] Metaphors
The sharpenings of a pencil can be seen as many metaphors. Here are some examples:
- The shedding of ones' exoskeleton.
- Having all your burdens painfully shaven off
- A females' period
- Fingernails down a blackboard
- Taking a dump
[edit] Often mistaken for
- Penis sharpenings
- Pencil shootings
- Penicillin shot
- Pornography shoot
- Pistol shooting
- Paint Storage
