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When Poland seceded from Michigan in 1929, the Poles wanted to do something different with their new constitution. While Michigan had a long tradition of having only one punishment for criminals—confinement to a tropical resort for varying lengths of time, in accordance with the severity of the crime, Poland thought this to be too ridiculous.

Poland decided to allow some more humane punishments, collectively termed cruel and unusual punishments. Among them included the death penalty, to be given only in two forms; hanging, electrocution, goring by wild ox and starvation.

The tropical resort was remodeled into a proper prison, the solitary confinement area was banned from the Internet, and the cafeteria budget was cut by 82% making the food only slightly better than the average high school cafeteria.

Polish punishments involving something less than death include flogging, flogging, slavery, sodomy with lead pipe, and entry in American Idol.

edit Historical cruel and unusual punishments

You have to watch unsexy hanging boobs

• Having to watch unsexy hanging boobs
• Having to sit in the corner. (Facing in)
• Having to sit in the corner. (Facing out)
• Sent to bed with no dinner.
• Being mauled by a badger.
• Listening to a continuous recording of the Crazy Frog
• Exile to Indiana University.
• Laughing at a joke that's not funny to make your boss happy. (Aren't you glad I didn't say Banana?)
• Visiting Grandma
• Religion.
• Being put in a round room and being told there is a penny in the corner.
• Being forced to edit an article called "Cruel and unusual punishment" on a website called "Uncyclopedia" on a machine called a "computer" using a device known as a "keyboard."
• Any time you have a hang nail and can't find the nail clippers.
• Being locked in a room with a Tickle-Me-Elmo doll set on repeat for the next few hours.
• Being forced to strip down to your underwear and paraded at the plaza while your legs are spread.
• Human trawling
• Watching a red/blue screen flickering on/off as you are tied up in a chair.
• Being stabbed by mechanical knives from nowhere.
• Solving a 1x1 Rubix Cube WITHOUT REMOVING THE STICKERS AND/OR REPLACING THEM ON DIFFERENT SIDES.
• Reading the World's Smallest Book within 20 minutes.
• Being forced to watch Yaoi or Yuri depending on your gender.
• Be forced to see a nude sexy woman's ass of a sister of Cleopatra. If you dont she will do her finger in your anus and she closes her vagina hole.
• Being forced to sit in a room with two holes in the wall with plastic boobs sticked in them. In this room there also locked doors to other rooms, which are only avaibile too NCAP, and contain photos of the ass of Jennifer Lopez. You never have the chance to see them, because those rooms are only for never criminally acting persons (NCAP}
• Sterility.
• Getting pwned.
• Losing your balls.
• Being unable to reproduce.
• Being unable to spawn young.
• Being unable have children.
• Loss of your genitals.
• Being permanantly celebate.
• Becoming a woman or a man depending on your gender.
• Shrinkage.
• Becoming a Nerd
• Sega Game Addiction
• Being forced to eat your own crap
• Lotsa SPAGHETTI kicks on da groin
• Being locked in a basement with the victim I tortured alive yesterday sitting on the corner begging for your help
• Being forced to play "Story of the Blanks" with different corpses behind you (One is a horse with machines inside to make it move and look like its a zombie)