Pearl necklace
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“Some people just give and give”
“They always get tangled up in my hair, takes me like an hour to get it out.”
Zed Zeber Toppman (ZZ Top) was the first man in recorded history to have given his girlfriend a pearl necklace for her birthday on June 1st, 1787. He also wrote a song about it and it can be heard on one of his earlier albums. It surprised her and coincidently she developed an eye infection when some of the pearls got into her eye. His girlfriend said that she wanted a facial next year.
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[edit] History
In ancient times men did not have much money, and women weren't worth any money. This left men in a bit of a situation due to women always wanting presents even though they weren't worth anything. Men decided to come up with a present that was both free and easy to come by. Thus the pearl necklace was invented.
[edit] Special Gift from Man to Woman
“The best gift of all is one you make yourself, it also helps take a load off your mind. . .”
Men have been giving women pearl necklaces for many years. The smile on her face and the jerk of her head when she first puts it on, are enough to make any man want to give her another. There are many variations of this beautiful gift, here are just some:
- Signature - the man attempts to write his name in the necklace
- Edible - In this variation, the necklace is taken off of the women and fed to her.(Sometimes forcibly)
- Ankle Bracelet - This less common pearl necklace is placed on the ankle or foot
- Belly Chain - Same as above but on the belly of the woman, this is sometimes created by accident if the man can't manage to put it higher on the woman.
- Pearl Thong - on the ass.
It should be noted that a pearl necklace can also be given to a man, either knowingly, or while he is passed out in your bathtub after drinking too many beer and eating too many werthers candies...
It can also be given to yourself if you're into that sort of thing.
[edit] Historical Figures and Pearl Necklaces
- Bill Clinton gave Monica Lewinsky a pearl necklace, she kept it with her long after their relationship along with a dress she was wearing at the time. Coincidently, Bill never gave one to his wife.
- Peter North is known for giving very large pearl necklaces.

