Parsec
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“This is going to take a while.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Parsec
“I'm about one parsec from fucking burying that guy.”
~ Steve Ballmer on That Guy
“When it comes to sex, I can last way longer than 12 parsecs.”
~ Harrison Ford on Parsec
A Parsec (or par-second) is a unit of time, equivalent to the average time it takes one second to travel one centimeter in a vacuum. There are approximately 31,536,000 Parsecs in a light year, give or take a few depending on how fast light is traveling in your vacuum's Event Horizon.
The Parsec is used to measure the time taken to complete a given leg of an interstellar journey. For instance, fourteen Parsecs is considered a good time to complete the Kessel run, and any time under twelve is superb.
A common error is attempting to use Parsec as a measure of distance instead of time. This unfortunate misuse dates back to a misinterpretation of the Bible, where the journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem is described as "A Parsec's Journey". Foolish scholars assumed this meant the distance between these cities defined a unit of length, while upon further review it was determined that this was just how long it took Jesus to teleport from one to the other.
