Obama and card stacking
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is being considered for deletion in accordance with Uncyclopedia's deletion policy.|
A little known hobby of the United States's president is the art of card stacking. While not considered an official sport it is certainly emotionally and physically demanding of even the sturdiest player. While difficult to achieve it is a balancing art of controlling various shapes and pieces and giving the illusion of creating a well constructed structure when in reality it is the art of placing pieces and forcing parts into an unnatural and highly unstable pyramid that can stand high for at least 60 seconds.
edit A Democrat Success Story
President Obama began his hobby of stacking cards as a young democrat, learning the skills early, needed to place one idea neatly on top of another idea. As he learnt to build a tower of cards he also understood the concept of never looking back. Once a card is laid, it is proverbially played, and is not to be removed again, no matter how stupid the original placement was. There is no time for change once that card is on the table.
As a senator he had already developed card stacking skills to such a degree that he could impress anyone with a quickly built tower of ideas all neatly and happily stacked into a nice little package. And when the cards fell down, oh did everyone have such a lovely laugh. "Ha ha ha, did you see that? One card slips and they all crash, plumeting down to the table, one poor rejected card on top of another."
edit The Chinese Invasion
But he only got better at keeping those cards up, and keeping them there as long as he had an audience of adoring fans. Obama was only later to discover that his Chinese counter part was an even better skilled master at the art of card stacking, and the two learnt a lot from each other during his visit to China, though it is thought that Wu Chung was without doubt the master of conceptual card stacking (a zen like game) and Obama, humble, learned much.
edit American Card Stacking Dominance
Quickly, not to be outdone by some under developed back water Asian circus economy, Obama set up his greatest and most determined effort to build a tower. With diligence, special care and Obama's style of effort, (Obama effort and Obama care) he built a tower never to be fallen and never to be wrought, no matter how horrifically unstable the bottom cards and complete lack of support offered even by the cards which needed such stability the most.
It is a miracle how that tower stood so high and mighty. And it certainly did manage to stay up while the audience was there. Oh the headlines, Obama, pulled of the most impressive card stacking triumph (though it is noted that leaders of all other developed countries quietly stacked a much stronger and stable pyramid decades ago) and though the cards are now falling off one at a time, no one is really looking at that withering tower anymore. That is the magic of Obama card stacking, not only does he pull it off, but the achievement is what is remembered, not the cards peeling off one by one afterwards. A genius. A magician. The ultimate card stacker of foreverdom.