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Welcome to The House of Pomegranates, the collection of short stories that is intended neither for the British child nor the British public.

Oscar Wilde has inspired us to work on 31,862 stories and plays since opening in January 2005.

Before modifying any of Wilde's works, please read the snooty writing guidelines and homo-acceptance manual.


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Oscar's Picks | Straight Index | Works in other Genres...

Another Oscar Wilde picture. From:


Chastity is a calling higher than marriage, and spiritually more profitable.

Oscar's Chosen Article

Today's Featured Article - Brave New World

Brave New World

Brave New World depicts a utopian society of the future, one in which everyone is produced by cloning in a hatchery and forced into a caste system. British author Aldous Huxley (pictured) wrote it—after a vacation to America where he was terrified by American promiscuity, mass-produced consumer goods, sparkling teeth, and large portions at restaurants—as a counterpoint to the optimistic predictions of the future, such as 1984, that his contemporaries were writing. Somehow, Huxley has been able to work this theme into not only a story but an entire novel, and later, a children’s toy franchise; specializing in action figures designed to shoot out those little spring-loaded missiles that seem to disappear within a few days of purchase.

The book continues to be a staple of secondary education, as it lets kids read sexually fueled literature by an author who was high on every drug known to man, including soma and acid. It is a popular book assignment in high school due to its depressing philosophy, which a student can be assigned to convert into a ponderously long essay that could easily be the beginnings of a deeply depressing doctoral thesis paper or a teen suicide note to the beta pluses that never understood them at Mensa. The book itself gives useful help on ponderousness, frequently using sentences longer than the time it takes to sing the National Anthem at the Super Bowl.(more...)

Recently featured: Brave New World

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You can suggest articles for Oscar to read.

More of Oscar's picks

Why was I born with such contemporaries?

March 21: Vernal Equinox (usually)

  • 5 A.D. - The first recorded instance of the question "What Would Jesus Do?" occurs when his mother asks what he wants for breakfast.
  • 1890 - Oscar Wilde pens his novel The Picture of Dorian Gray in the vicinity of one of his favorite sources of inspiration, a kitchen sink.
  • 1919 - The Treaty of Versailles is dictated to several secretaries, ending World War I. One of them is a German spy and covertly adds a clause mandating a sequel.
  • 1931 - The electric guitar is introduced, resulting in the genre of Rock 'n Roll being born and enjoying its peak during the Great Depression.
  • 1943 - In the last recorded mounted cavalry charge, soldiers on horseback from Austria-Hungary charge a battalion of Russian tanks and succeed in destroying 80% of them using only their broadswords and ceremonial poofy hats.
  • 1993 - The first video is uploaded on the internet: a skin flute performance.

The history of the United Kingdom

The one duty we owe to history is to rewrite it.


Second Front Pages: BrexitHillary!TrumpUK 2015 electionGreece

Today in London

It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information, so did you know...

From Uncyclopedia's playwrights:

  • ...that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?

Read on

This Month's Wit

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.

Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!

It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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