North Pole
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In geography, the North Pole, also called "Antarctica 2: The Northern One", is one of two special points on Earth's surface where time stops, compasses break down, and many physical laws go wonky. (For the other such point, see Beek, The Netherlands.)
In literature, the "North Pole" are two random words, an adjective and a noun, that are often put together. Other examples would include "Ugly Betty", "Green Car" or "Super Jelly."[1]
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[edit] Theory
The existence of the North Pole was first postulated by Stephen Hawking in 1994 in his book "I Reckon There Are Two Icy Tips Of This Planet", which detailed his complex cosmological model about there being not one, but two icy poles. It was widely ridiculed by the physics community[2] as the work of a madman.
However, the theory received wide acceptance by the physics community some 15 years later, when the Superconducting Super Collider detected magnetic north monopoles, which were created from the high-energy collisions of relativistic penguins and antipenguins. Then again, he may have been lying. With Stephen Hawking, you never can tell; he is the Master of Lies.
[edit] Exploration
In 1997, NASA, in joint cooperation with Answers in Genesis, launched their first unmanned mission to the North Pole: the Sarfati 2. The probe landed safely five years later, but was promptly eaten by a pack of wild dinosaurs before any data could be returned. As a result of this horrendous fiasco, the Bush administration has decided to curtail funding for all planned future NASA and AIG missions. In 1985 Russians had already explored the North Pole, discovering for their great surprise Titanic, which had apparently sailed there to revenge to the icebergs. Few pictures taken were later used in Titanic movie.
[edit] Government
The North Pole is also the location of the Yuletide North Stripper Pole, a rogue nation led by Santa Claus. No other nations exist in the area, but several tribes of elves, who have escaped the harsh rule of the dictator Santa Claus, exist as different rebel movements, which attempt to overthrow St. Nick. The most notable of these groups are the atheist-marxist "Frente Marxista de la Liberación de los Duendes" (F.M.L.D.) based in northern Russia, the Jewish group "Shlomo's Kosher Dogs" of northern Greenland, and the Islamist group Hezbollah. Another thing to do with the north pole is Santa Claus ie. saint Nicolas.Santa is a very big hit in all major countries and his "toy factory" are believed to infact be at the north pole.Also penguins inhabit the north pole,they are very smart beings. with all the sliding and marches and huddles. That is where the huddle originated from. Just like the hakka originated from gorillas.
[edit] Inhabitants
Indigenous wildlife of this place obviously include Elves Santa reindeers and even Aliens who regularly crashland there and also the corpse of the Easter Bunny (which Santa killed in 1987). Notice: All aforementioned wildlife have had to resort to snorkels. Their igloo has melted. They would be sad, if only had feelings. Fortunately, they are white so it doesn't matter. The survivng Nazis from the Red Army have planned to overthrow the current government and form a dictatorship there.They have been inhabiting it for over 3 decade and have smuggled in weapons and armed vehicles from black markets all over the world. This is the 1st step of their plans to take over the world.
[edit] Environment
At the North Pole there is a great deal of pollution as Santa Claus is a fat and lazy old man who doesn't bother recycling all the crap coming out of his workshop. This has caused icy cold winters and summers with intense radiation that killed around 1000 elves per quarter in the past 3 years. The leader of the elf village has planned to form a political protest in the coming months of 2010 and remove Mr. Claus's 'behind' from office. Another side effect of the pollution coming about this year is genetically mutated polar bears who have begun to migrate to regions such as the United States and the "internet" and killed many citizens in violent rampages. Hopefully, these issues will be addressed by America's garbage disposal system, as Polar bears drop dead at the sight of American trash (Pun >D).
[edit] References
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[edit] See also
- Peter North
- Particle accelerator
- Arctic Circle
- Bipolar bear
- Worst 100 Locations of All Time
- Midnight Sun
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