National Guilt Association

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No not Guilty By Association, that band, you moron, The National Guilt Association.

Okay, I'm sorry I said that. You're not really stupid.

Please forgive me, I didn't mean it.

Now I feel bad. Real bad, come on. No, stop crying, pleeeaaaseee.

Its all my fault, isn't it? No it is. Don't say its because your work day was rough, or that you couldn't get it up for your girlfriend and she dumped you. Its my fault.

Don't backpeddle, you had every reason to yell at me. No, please stop crying.

I can tell. You say apology accepted, but I know, I ruined our friendship. It'll never be the same because of me. I just wont talk ever again, okay? Because whenever I talk, I hurt someone. You probably don't trust me anymore, do you?

I just... I feel so..... so..... so......


“They truly feel guilty about everything, they even feel guilty about feeling guilty about everything, which they feel guilty about. It actually makes me feel guilty...”
~ Oscar Wilde on National Guilt Association

“Its an group of people who feel bad about stuff”
~ Captain Obvious on National Guilt Association
“Why do I feel so guilty? Is it something to do with that hooker my wife doesn't know about?”
~ Jesus LaBrie on National guilt Association
“Was that a dumb play off of a Dream Theater song?”
~ Some Guy on That last quote

The National Guilt Association is a group of people whose entire life is spent being truly, completely sorry for all the mean stuff they put you through, because they all know you deserve way better treatment than a huge group of utter douche-fags putting you down in such ways that you feel sad or not happy.

No Wikipedia
Wikipedia doesn't have a proper article about National Guilt Association. It really wouldn't help those so-called experts by writing one either.

edit Reasons For You To Join

You feel guilty. Even if you dont think you do, you do. Even if you don't join, I hope you feel the guilt of your soft-headed ignorance and biased opinion on such a serious topic. Okay, I'm sorry I said that. Anyway, you should totally join.

edit Why Are You Guilty?

edit People Who Are Guilty

  • Tiger Woods
  • Matthew Mcconaughey (He feels bad for starring in [insert crappy movie starring Matthew Mcconaughey])
  • Tyra Banks for lacking a vagina
  • Every one of [ Lady Gaga's] ex (and current) boyfriends. No... Wait, that's just regret.
  • You
  • Your Mom for birthing you. No... Wait, that's just regret.
  • Probably that guy, as well.
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