Mushroom Kingdom

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The Mushroom Kingdom

Some stripes

Official languages Toadriophouhervaungh

English, Japanese, Gibberish

Capital Toad Town
Largest City Mushroom Corner City
Monarch Princess Peach, Bowser
UN Delegate Mario, Luigi
Established 1985 by King Toadstool & Princess Peach
Army The Toad Retainers
Currency Coins
National anthem "Mario!!."
National Heroes The Mario Bros.(or jack the backpack)

The Mushroom Kingdom is a magical land full of jackass that can only be accessed through pipes found throughout Brooklyn, Italy and Japan. Various attempts have been made to extend public transportation links to other pipes around the Earth but funding for this has been scarce. Due to lack of funding, it was learned that one can enter the Mushroom Kingdom through simple means; the consumption of Magic Mushrooms. The Mushroom Kingdom is noted for its lush green fields, waterfalls, and killer population of mushrooms. The Mushroom Kingdom's gravity is approximatley 5000000000% as strong as earth's gravity, this website is full of shit and lies and if are dumb enough to believe this shit then you are a SUPER Gay Homofag!

Contents

[edit] History of the Mushroom Kingdom

It is generally understood that Mushroom Kingdom history began with the hyper-evolution of the fungal population, after a massive influx of DINNER ooze from the Brooklyn sewers came pouring down the pipes. The mutations caused by the ooze caused the fungal life to develop at a faster rate than would normally be possible, leading to the first forms of intelligent fungus-based life, colloquially known as "Mushroom People" or "Toads".

By 105 B.C., the fungi had evolved into relatively intelligent beings, starting to build simple structures and engage in early forms of trading. Small tribal groups were formed, each consisting of groups of fungi of the same color swearing allegiance to a monarch. The three most notable of these tribes were the were the red mushrooms, green mushrooms, and the blue poisonous mushrooms. The blue mushrooms used to hide in bricks, but disappeared because of peer pressure. At this time, a fourth tribe, consisting of piranha plants, was also forming.

After a fierce territorial battle between the combined red mushroom and green mushroom tribes against the piranha plants, the piranha plants retreated to the farther regions of the area that would soon become the Mushroom Kingdom. This cut them off from the supply of radioactive waste, which slowed their development greatly. YOU WILL DIE

The most highly evolved citizen of the future Mushroom Kingdom was Princess Peach I,(also pronouced "whore") who was given that title after bringing together the green and red mushroom tribes under one flag. Together, they established The Mushroom Kingdom and began developing a massive series of pipes and castles spread out over the land.

Then of course, one day, everything changed, four plumbers entered the kingdom, Wario, Waluigi, Luigi, and of course, the Great MARIO! Wario and Waluigi basically just moved there for the scenery money, and Luigi was banned from Brooklyn for getting wasted and killing three hookers. But he's O.K. now...Mario, on the other hand, goes and saves the Kingdom from the Evil King Koopa AKA. Bowser. Recent tests have indicated that there is a fifth plumber named Riley, who is a very buff man with bulging muscles and a bob the builder outfit only its black and white. Riley will be staring in super mario bros v the world along with mario, luigi, wario and waluigi.

Toads wear colorful native garb

[edit] History of the Mushroom Kingdom Educational Video Series

The Chancelor of the Mushroom Kingdom, Toadsworth, created a series of videos for educating young toad children the history of their great nation, these videos included much violence and exageration of certain events to keep the kiddies interested. These videos were very succesful, but mostly only because no one else has even bothered to make any other history videos to compete with them... oh well...

[edit] Episode I The Bowser Menace

[edit] Episode II Attack of the Hedgehogs

[edit] Episode III Revenge of the Sonic

[edit] Episode IV A New Hope (soon turns to No Hope)

[edit] Episode V Lord Smithy Strikes Back

[edit] Episode VI The Destruction of Yoshi's Island

[edit] Episode VII Return of the Eggman

[edit] Episode VIII The Great Doomship Offensive

[edit] Mushroom Kingdom Music and Culture

The citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom have a long held tradition of praying to the Mushroom God at 5:45 PM and jumping up at 6:00 PM for 5 minutes. Those who refuse to participate are burned at the stake as heretics.

Sports are also very popular within the Mushroom Kingdom. Kart racing, tennis, baseball, soccer and melee fighting are just a few among the sports popular among the citizens of the mushroom kingdom. Kart racing especially has been known to attract denizens from all over the Mushroom Kingdom, because of its elaborate races and tournaments.

Gambling makes up a major component of the Mushroom Kingdom culture and economy. It is encouraged by Princess Peach and her court because it helps to facilitate the spread of gold coins throughout the surrounding areas. Magical items like leaves, fire flowers, and invincibility stars are also up for grabs at these official houses of gambling.

The Mushroom Kingdom has also had a rich musical tradition since the earliest days of its founding. Electronic music is a popular genre enjoyed by the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom, though David Bowie is quite popular as well.

[edit] Geography

The Mushroom Kingdom is divided into several distinct provinces by sudden natural variations in the climate, all encompassing their own unique set of citizens.

[edit] Grass Land

Princess Peach's Castle I, a few days before its destruction on 9/11.

World 1-1 is what surrounds Princess Peach's castle, it consists mainly of lush green fields, long brick roads, boxes and brick highways suspended in the air. The waterfalls and streams that flow through the area generally do not have bridges over them, leading to the need to jump over them or plunge to certain death. Furthermore, there are many small mushroom towns dotted about that have gambling houses to obtain items of worth. Some say that Grass Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World others say its part of India. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish to slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

[edit] Desert Land

Extending beyond the borders of Grass Land, the Mushroom Kingdom also encompasses a large desert that is difficult to travel during the summer months of the year, though it is generally acknowledged by citizens that it can be quite delightful during other periods during the year. Pyramids and other artifacts, possibly of an older civilization, mark this area. Occasionally during the hot summer months, the Livid With Rage Sun will come down to catch a breeze or two, resulting in having to jump over him or be burned to a crisp. Some say that Desert Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World others say its part of Russia. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

[edit] Water Land

Located off the northern coast of the Mushroom Kingdom, this is a recently colonized area of the fledgling kingdom. Small towns are located throughout the area but it is generally difficult to travel from one to another without the aid of a Frog Suit or other form of aquatic transportation. It is also well known for the dangerous native Big Bertha fish, which can swallow humans whole. Some say that Water Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom others sat its part of the ocean.

[edit] Giant Land

This island province is one of the most dangerous areas in the Mushroom Kingdom. Due to it's geographic inaccessibility, it has become a scientific breeding ground for grossly mutated creatures and citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom. There are also many BALCO test labs here. The R.F.A. heavily patrols the border between this area and the rest of the Mushroom Kingdom to prevent any attacks by the mutated creatures. Some say that Giant Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World where as others say its part of China. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

[edit] Sky Land

Yoshis prey on the weak

Flight was pioneered by Mario in his early adventures to the Mushroom Kingdom. The colonization of Sky Land is a result of continued progress in this field. Sky Land was colonized in A.D. 1990. It is generally believed that this was done as part of a large government project to promote tourism throughout the Mushroom Kingdom. Gambling, drugs, and prostitution are rampant in Sky Land due to the tourism. Recently, legislation to stem the tide of "moral decay" has been proposed by the Mushroom Council. Some say that Sky Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World others say it is part of Canada. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom.

[edit] Ice Land

Another attempt of the Mushroom Council to extract tourism money from otherwise uninhabitable lands, the province of Ice Land is almost completely covered in snow and ice. While several ski lodges and a track devoted to the Super Kart Tournament were founded here, Ice Land is generally not popular due to its extremely cold climate. It is kindly referred to by most tourists as "Slip-y Slide-y Ice world." Some say that Ice Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom others say its part of Greenland.

[edit] Pipe Land

One of the projects of Dr. Von Fungi was to create a massive public transportation system that would extend throughout the Mushroom Kingdom. The central hub was to be on an atoll at the southern border of the Grass Land, so that local and international travel would be easily accessible to the public. As with most government projects, the result was complete and utter chaos. Pipe Land has become a confusing mass of pipes who have no logical pattern to their destinations. There have been cases where people have gone missing for years and been presumed dead, only to later turn up in pipe land. Reform legislation has been proposed by the Mushroom Council but no funds have been earmarked for the coming fiscal year. Some say that Pipe Land is, in fact, part of the Mushroom World. They are lying vicious commie robot ninjas from the future that wish the slander the image of the Mushroom Kingdom some say its part of a sink in Brazil.

[edit] Yoshi's Island

An island located off the south-west coast of the Mushroom Kingdom. Officially called the Yoshi Republic. Often called Level 1, Retard Land or Japan. It is inhabited by a sophisticated, advanced race known as the Yoshi. Around 1180 AD, the enslaved Yoshis desired independence. After training for several months on Age of Empires II, the Yoshis staged a bloody revolt against their mushroom overlords. The Yoshi Republican Army and the Mushroom Imperial Army fought for ten years in a bloody Nintendo Revolution. Casualties in the Mushroom Army were so high that Princess Peach eventually decided to piss on the whole campaign, and the Toads simply left Yoshi's island. The Yoshis were quickly forgotten about, and nobody even knew that they existed until 1991, when the "Super Nintendo" age arrived. Yoshi's island is one of those countries that's just there, kinda like Poland.

This drink now replaces 1-Up and is now exporting to the world.

[edit] Government

The government of the Mushroom Kingdom is a constitutional monarchy, with Princess Peach as the ruler. She can only rule with the consent of a democratically elected Mushroom Council, made up of nine members. The head of the council is Dr. Von Fungi, who has been involved in numerous scandals.

Wario is an official governor who is greedy, lazy, and tried to make the Mushroom Kingdom a dictatorship until Mario burned him in a sword fight.

[edit] Economy

The Mushroom Kingdom trades principally in mushrooms. While charges of slavery have been made, the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom defend their practice by stating there is scientific evidence that the mushroom "cousins" they are trading on the world market are not intelligent beings, even though they can move. There is a growing protest movement within the mushroom community over this practice. Compared to a niegbouring country called "The Bean Bean Kingdom" the Mushroom Kingdom economy is terrible, 2 Bean Bean Kingdom coins is worth 99999999999999999999999 Mushroom Kingdom coins.

The Mushroom Kingdom also holds a significant amount of gold coins that are used to bankroll the large construction projects that are constantly occurring throughout the Mushroom Kingdom. There are red coins which are worth 2 gold coins and blue coins which are worth 5 blue coins but nobody heard of them until 1996. Mario is the largest stockholder in the Royal Mushroom Bank and has final say over any financial transactions.

Major Imports/Exports

  • Bricks
  • Fertilizer
  • Seeds
  • Coffee
  • Cheese
Fire Flower - Major Export

Major Exports

  • Gold
  • Chaos Emeralds
The poisonous 1-up drinks are still being pulled off shelves.
  • Mushrooms
  • Turnips
  • Flying carpets
  • Fire flowers
  • Capes
  • Red hats
  • 1up
  • Green hats
  • Sweet and sour sauce
  • Sexually confused pink egg-spitting dinosaurs

[edit] Surrounding Countries & Planets

[edit] See Also

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