Montenegro (Slogan)

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Montenegro is a popular shout in the foreign language of Montedge, a language comprised mostly of gibberish in this author's head (composed sometime between snorting 30 kilos of coke and taking a sledgehammer to the head. See AAAAAAAAA! for more details). Translated from Montedge the shout literally means "black mountain."

edit Origins

See Serbian History


It was first shouted by a severely colorblind soldier from the Nation of Ruckus who charged what was, in actuality, a hill covered in blood of his countrymen. The colorblind soldier obviously thinking the red to be black he made the charge, inevitably dying in horrible agony by slipping on the blood and hitting his head on a rock. The battle from that day forward would be called "The Battle of Black Mountain Against the Evil 'Calm Empire' (although the last part of the name was immediately forgotten)."

edit Rememberance

The people from that nation and around the world celebrate that battle every 137 days. Such festivities include:

  • The obligatory shout ("For Black Mountain!!!!!!!!")
  • The obligatory charge (usually couple with a blood curdling cry)
  • The charge up a hill any color other than black (always with people on the top of the hill carrying rocks)

and of course:

  • Many, many deaths, incurred by the end of the festivities.

In fact, it has recently come into law in Serbia that there must be a minimum amount of fatalaties incurred in the festival, to be no less than or equal to, 20,000 (which happens to be the approximate size of the largest opposition party in the dictatorship.)

edit Problems

It is a scientific fact that shouting "Montenegro" while charging a hill of any color will boost everyone's morale. It is not uncommon to see a few young men and women see an uphill parking lot, and charge it "For Black Mountain." Some, however, will take it much too far. One instance in the 1895 San Francisco Gazette where 5 Gentlemen, 1 Woman and a canary named Lou did the charge NOT on the given 137th day, charging up one of their many hills, and into a trolley car. (One among many trolley cars to get a taste for human blood, and think of it as the "San Fransisco Treat.") It was immediately decided by the great Emperor Joshua A. Norton that Trolleys "...must give right of way to Black Mountain lovers...at the threat of a $50 fine...$500 if they hit a Black Mountain lover."

Another problem arose in the 1937 Moscow Times when, while actually done on the given day, 500 peasants decided to charge DOWN the mountain with the chant. They were all killed for not dying from rock impact.

Though these problems were extreme it can be tempered with the orange chicken treatment, completely confusing Black Mountain lovers into something resembling half-sanity. If Elmer's Glue is anywhere near the Orange Chicken treatment though, the afflicted will think they are pigeons and will try to fly off into the night sky, usually dying 15 years later in Tiajuana. Top scientists to this day cannot understand this phenomena.

edit Fun Fact

This term was actually used accidentally as a shorthand for "Monte Python and add racial slur here" back in the seventees.

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