Montblanc
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Montblanc is a homosexual moogle from Final Fantasy, who is a leader there. He used to be the hidden member of Clan Microsoft, but was kicked out for being "too invisible" and made his own clan. He can sometimes be a dumbshit be a few propellers short of an airship.
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[edit] Birth
He was about to be named Charles Dickenstone by his parents, but they argued and were killed by an avalanche. The baby was found by his master and was named Montblanc as his slave name.
[edit] Childhood
Young Montblanc tries to do Black Magic, his first spells are "Bat Fuck Insane", "Bat Fuck Insanera", and "Bat Fuck Insanega". He also "slept" with people like Barney, Dora, and the Teletubbies when he was 10. He was sent into an asylum because of that, and was freed 3 years later.
[edit] Building Up the Clan
His master died being sexually abused by Yiazmat, which made Montblanc wanted some revenge. Because of his lost of his master, he went insane and killed millions of Seeqs, which are associated with Yiazmat. Montblanc was about to be punished by suicide, but due to the Seeqs' status as slaves, he was set free and went to the Asylum before he created his own clan. His clan (named "Clan Nutsy") were mostly made of Mentalists (except for Tomaj of course, he's the sane one). One of the members is Marche, an Aspie.
[edit] Love Life
Montblanc was once in a polygamic marriage. He starts by marrying Reaker the Moogle, then Fras the Viera. They had too much trouble (especially his "man part") so all of them had divorced from each other. It is now unknown who will Montblanc finally marry due to his "man part" and bad sins.
But despite of this, there were rumors of Montblanc dating with Shantotto, from the Rev sub-race the Taru-Taru. It seems really surprising because Shantotto is the type of girl who neglects marriage.
[edit] Health Problems
Montblanc is known as a drug dealer, he had already tried Over 9000 types of drugs, and consumed 25% of them each year. Due to this habits, it causes his disability of chocobo riding. He is also known with a big "man part", being neglected by women easily. More recently, he contracted HIV from Luso Clemens right after his rehab.
Montblanc is also known for an abnormal mouth. Because of that he spent half of his clan funds on plastic surgery. Ironically, he didn't let the surgeons do the "man part" job. 20 years later, his habit of his evil insane laughing caused him jaw problems, which made his mouth open for a long period of time.
[edit] Song
His song is Teach Me, Montblanc, which has a limited edition soundtrack which has Montblanc (voiced by Kumiko Yokote) teaching you how to have good "love". His remix is called Teach Me, Montblanc (Faggot version) (Yes, there's two "g"s!) which teaches you about Yaoi.
[edit] Human Form
If you beat the mission "Moogle Bride" 5 times in Final Fantasy Tactics Advance, Montblanc will force himself to turn into a human and the enemy will fall in love with him. In Final Fantasy Tactics A2, he will turn into a hotter human form if you beat the mission "A Bride for Montblanc".
Also, there a hidden cut scene where Balthier and Mustadio encountered Montblanc, only to know that Montblanc's transformation was a huge rip-off of them two.
[edit] Inspiration
A celebrety named herself "Monbu Ran", the Japanese name of Montblanc. Oh, she does the same thing as him, all right.
[edit] Interesting Facts
- He fucks his brothers.
- His stats suck.
- He is a shemale.
- Sucks dicks, (no, really)
- Tries to fuck chocobos, but can't.
- He is worse than George Dubya Bush
[edit] The only things why Montblanc is Good
- He leads a clan. AWESOME!
- Black mages are sexy!
[edit] See Also
[edit] External Links
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