Monica Lewinsky's Blue Dress

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Lewinsky dress

The current state of the artifact of a great American era.

A stained blue dress was a single piece of physical evidence that underlay Independent Counsel Kenneth Starr's proof that former U.S. President Bill Clinton received oral sex from a young, powerless intern while First Lady Hillary Clinton practiced running the country.

Emergence of this evidence marked the end of the phase where Clinton wagged his finger at an admiring nation and stated under oath that "there is no sexual relationship"--and began expounding on all the different things "is" could have meant.

edit The encounter

Monica Lewinsky initially met the "President from Hope" (actually, Hot Springs) after responding to the following classified ad from the October 2, 1995 issue of the Washington Times:

WANTED: Ravenous, dedicated fellatrix of ravishing labial beauty, voluptuous callimastian figure, and indefatigable talent to be frequently and intensively irrumated by a competent and highly experienced member. FOR: pharyngeal expulsion of prostatic and testicular concoctions; indulgence of gender-stereotypical orally-fixated hedonistic cravings.

In retrospect, this wording may have been problematic.

edit Where they are now


Hillary Clinton meets the dress in her own blue number.

Main article: Impeachment

Unfortunately, actions have consequences--at times, even in Washington, D.C.--and the episode led to the impeachment of Clinton, in a case that was never about sex, followed by a vote by a large majority of the U.S. Senate that "We prefer this laughing-stock to Al Gore."

Lewinsky's dress was bought at auction by Richard Mellon Scaife. He uses it to wash his car, as he finds that semen works almost as well as wax to make raindrops bead up.

More recently, state funds have been appropriated to repurchase the dress from Scaife and place it in the Smithsonian Institution, as the heart of a display that would commemorate Arkansas' eight years in the limelight.

Clinton has moved on to advocate for disaster relief in places like Haiti, whose dirt-poor residents are perhaps more eager to show their gratitude to a foreign celebrity. Lewinsky, after a brief career as a spokeswoman for a diet program, moved to England, a place where such women are held in high esteem.

edit See also

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