From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
“If Man does not live on bread alone then why not be the world's largest producer of locally consumed jungle veggies? We shall trade pickled jungle veggies globally by 2045!”
Mizoram is a state within the United Kingdom of India, Mizoram is one of the seven step-daughters of Mamma India. The state shares its boundaries with Assam (inhabited by the Assamese people) in the north, Manipur (Population density: 1450 rebels per square kilometer) in the north east, the Army's own Democracy of Myanmar in the east, and Bangladesh in the west.
The formerly established characterization of the region as hills interspersed with valleys was contended by Marxist Feminist geographers as travelers and being one promoting class hierarchy. Consequently, regular geographers have decided to categorize the region as "a classless hill state". A couple of rivers that run through the state are basically drains that were built by the Assamese people of the Assam at north to restore their health into the great wide bay of the Bongs. Some of them stretch up to Burma. One takes a U-turn and goes right back to the Assam state.
Had the government at the Centre had their say in naming the state, they would have called it the Democratic Non-Communist Republic of China. Neverthless, this is a land which embraces and contains all races. White and white babies are typically in majority in Vairengte. US Marines have been frequenting this sleepy border town to experience and re-enact the ass-whooping in Vietnam. Those that are of dubious ethnic origins include the self-styled Jews and Feminist geographers.
Speaking of the English language is restricted to sophisticated smart people, mostly in a proper, intelligible fashion. Mizo (or southern Mandarin to non-speakers) is the lingua franca within the state. Speaking of Hindi is restricted as a precautionary measure; just in case China decides to invade. Some ghetto speakers even speak the three out of two dialects of the Goo-goo language, including Tooty, Gaa-gaa and Engrish.
One of the lost tribes of Israel, the Mizos made their way across the great Urals, descended upon Mongolia, didn't like the chhurpi diet, headed down south towards Burma, didn't like the military government there, moved westward, and then settled down in the jungles that finally provided a cover for their nakedness. The White Man came, saw, and conquered. Then the Brown Man came, saw, and then wondered how the Chinese got there. Statehood was granted soon after the Government at New Delhi discovered how ridiculously funny it would be to create a tongue shaped territory right beneath that of the Ass people.
edit The Ratbellion of 1966
Intense famine raged across the land in the winter of 1966. The Ass people of the north unanimously decided to send aid in the form of rats because they were too lazy and bags of rice down have legs. The people of Mizoram, highly unamused by this act of practical goof, rose up in unison to build a bamboo curtain along the border to shield off incoming rats and imported AK-47 rifles from Mainland China to defend themselves against highly evolved rats. The government of the United Kingdom of India, then ruled by Her Majesty Indira Emergency Gandhi, saw this as an attempt to secede from the empire and sent two bullock driven missile launchers to destroy the barrier.
The government's economic policy is summed up in these words: 'Let us excel in trade imports.; let us be original for once and depart from the Korean way.' Among its imports are rice, wheat, maize, electricity, bootleggers, Nepalese, Bangladeshis, Biharis, school teachers from Kerala, rapists (refer to the Religion section), and all essential items and out rightly non-essential humans. Zoramthanga's (the former ratbellion head honcho and former Chief Minister of the state) attempt to export canned jungle veggies was vehemently opposed and ultimately led to his ratbellion party losing the mandate in 2009.
With lots and lots of Mizos around, there is lots of magic. But later, with the coming of satellite TV and consequently Master Chef, high cholesterol diet has been infused into the Mizo gastronomic regimen. Weddings are the single-most most popular recreational event. Marriage ceremonies outnumber child-birth three to one on a daily basis. The Mizos believe in magic in their homeland that is actually real, and this means they are actually lucky. For some of the further information, see below. Animal Crossing was an inspiration to this, you know, right?
Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs, and other rapists comprise the minority. Christianity is the religion of the majority. Also in existence are the Presbyterians, Baptists, Evangelicals, Pentecostals, Salvation Army, the Seventh Day Adventist, and false prophets. Catholicism is growing owing to their no-protection ideology. Mizoram also has their cool own religion category called Mizorism, and about 86.7% of all the currently living Mizorists have ten gods (or sages) including the Loot Carnation, the Gorgeous Elephant, the Ricky Fish, the Hong Chongk (Lol Wut) Pear, Mijit (Dwarf) Apple, the Shanti (Shanty) Crabapple, the Woozi (Ejaculate) Salmon, and the Crop-Planting Teddy Bear. Lovely, right?
A nation united by virtually nothing, please
|States: East Bengal • Kashmir • Kerala • Maharashtra • Mizoram • Uttar Pradesh • Tulu Nadu|
|Cities: Bangalore • Chandigarh • Pune|
|Religions: Buddhism • Hinduism • Jainism • Tantra • Zoroastrianism|
|Funny guys: Amitabh Bachchan • Bobby Deol • Barkha Dutt • Mohandas Gandhi • Nathuram Godse • Guru Maharaj Ji • Rudyard Kipling • Daler Mehndi • Narendra Modi • Manmohan Singh • Rabindranath Tagore • Mother Teresa|
|A zoo-full of deities: Ganesha • Hanuman • Kali|
|A menagerie of Bhagavad-gita articles: Bhagavad-gita • Bhagavad Gita • à la Rushdie|
|Languages: Engrish • Hindi • Sanskrit • Telugu|
|Other stuffs: BJP • BSNL • Bollywood • Border Gavaskar Trophy • Brahmin • CIPET • Curry • Football • Ganges • Holi • Indian hippies • Indian Institutes of Technology • Iyers • Jat • Kamasutra • Mango • Ramayana • Rock • Rupees • Taj Mahal • The Times • Turban • Urumi • VJTI|