Mike Tyson
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Mike Tyson is the President of the United States. Tyson was elected in late 2008, replacing former President Kermit The Frog and defeating Republican candidate Dennis Rodman in a landslide victory. Mike Tyson is the first Communist president the U.S. has ever had. Mike Tyson is a strong supporter of both marijuana and gun rights. Tyson will serve from 2008 until at least 2030, due to his unexpected change to the 22nd Amendment for a single term to be 22 years instead of just four.
Contents |
[edit] History
Mike Tyson was born in Toronto, Canada. Mike Tyson's lisp is due to his boyhood heroin addiction. Tyson sold cocaine on the streets of downtown Toronto as a boy. Mike Tyson went on to become a boxer later in his life. Mike Tyson hopped the border in Vermont from Canada to the U.S. to persue his dream, because in Canada, boxing is forbidden, due to Canada's Nazi government (Eh?).
[edit] So Mike Tyson is Canadian, Eh?
Yeah he is.
[edit] Mike Tyson Becomes President
In late 2008, Mike Tyson was elected President in a landslide victory, defeating Republican candidate by over 200 electoral votes. All U.S. states went to Tyson except for the State of Arizona, which went to Dennis Rodman for unknown reasons. After Mike Tyson won the presidency, he ordered his guards to kidnap Dennis Rodman and have him skinned and deep fried and served at a restaurant in DC as "fried fish", no joke.
[edit] Mike Tyson To Have All U.S. Jews Put In CAMP?
In January of 2009, President Mike Tyson announced that he would have all U.S. Jews rounded up and put in concentration camps. President Tyson said about this venture, "We're gonna need some GAS to get all these kike motherfuckers in CAMP!"
