Microsoft Office source code
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“It seems there are too much spelling errors; do you want to perform an automated spellcheck?”
~ Clippy
“it seemz tere iz tew mutch spelin erorz, du ya wan 2 runz a atomatad spel chak”
~ Hypocrisy on Microsoft Office
Microsoft is a passionate proponent of proprietary programs, and they staunchly stand by their strange and stupid (some argue) stance on not openly stating stuff related to their software. So there was much petulant pouting and strenuous stomping about in frustration when an elite group of hackers breached the source code for Microsoft Office. They were perfectly stymied.
This team of hackers, with their dashing good looks and roguish--you know what? Screw it. I don't like to brag, but, y'know, it was me who hacked this source code. All me. Sure, I'd like to say it was me and my bros, sure, but in all reality those my friends from the World of Warcraft forums did JACK SQUAT in this operation. They were all like, "Oh, I'll help you as soon as I level up my epic my mount!" Just screw them. My epic mount is their mother, and if she leveled up to be any fatter, she might not be able to walk.
So I present to you, fellow Internet, the source code that I hacked with my elite hacking skills. No need to thank me. I'm just doing my job. OPEN SOURCE RULES!!!!!131
-- 1337c4kes 0010000100100100
[edit] The Code (Top Secret!)
#include <iostream.h>
#include <vengeance.h>
#include <world/domination.h>
#include <monopoly.h>
#include <evil.h>
#include <office.h>
#include <clippy.h>
#include <annoying.h>
#define USER_FRIENDLY NULL
int main(argc,argv)
{
while (!CRASHED)
{
initialize();
open_document(argv);
do_nothing_loop();
popup_clippy(clippy_quotes[rand(0,666)]);
if (save_button_is_pressed())
{
popup_clippy("Word is about to crash. There is no chance of saving your document.");
popup_clippy("Would you like to play a game?", "Yes", "No");
}
if (new_document_is_pressed())
{
stuff_hard_drive(66666);
wait(6666);
create_new_document();
}
if (key_pressed)
{
popup_clippy("It seems you are typing, need some help??");
}
if (quitted())
{
popup_clippy("Don't go! I want to play with you!!!");
return 0;
}
}
return CRASHED;
}
[edit] Other source codes
• Detect "non-genuine" products
• Gather user information
• Cripple core system components
• Deploy legal team
• Launch civil litigation
Estimated time remaining:
Less than 1 min.
Related technology:
MS-UNO
MS-DOS
MS-TRES
.NET
Blue Screen of Death
Calculator
CTRL-ALT-DEL
Developers!
DirectX
Hotmail
Internet Explorer
UnNews: Microsoft unveils Internet Genuine Advantage
MSNopoly
Microsoft Products Online Technical Support
Minesweeper
Microsoft Access
Microsoft Keyboard
Microsoft Office
Microsoft Office source code
Microsoft Outlook
Microsoft Sidewinder
Microsoft Surface
MS Paint
PowerPoint
Microsoft VirusCreator
MS Word
Microsoft Word Paperclip
MSNBC
Windows Live Messenger
New Text Document.txt
Notepad
Registry Editor
System Idle Process
Total Fucking Asshole Server 2006
Windows BSODcare
Windows Chess
Windows FireRed/LeafGreen
Windows Media Player
Windows Movie Maker
Windows source code
Task Manager
Windows Live Uncyclopedia Portal
Windows X-Console
Windows Product line:


