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|Birth name||Dominic Retsim-Ocem Monardo III|
|Born|| 38 BBY (3:11:29BrS)|
Galactic City, Coruscant, Galactic Republic
|Genre(s)||Space disco, galactic funk, synthpop, easy listening, jizz, jatz|
|Occupation(s)||Musician, record producer, arranger, space ranger, part-time superhero|
|Instrument(s)||Trombone, laser guns, lightsaber|
|Years active||12 BBY–8 ABY|
|Label(s)||Light Side Records|
|Associated acts||The Max Rebo Band, Jar Jar Binks|
Dominic Retsim-Ocem "Meco" Monardo III (born 38 BBY) is a Coruscanti musician, record producer, arranger, and part-time superhero, not the name of a band or production team based around him. He is best known for his 0 ABY disco version of the Star Wars theme from his album Star Wars and Other Galactic Funk; both the single and album were certified Kyber by Coruscant radio.
edit Early life
Meco was born on Coruscant to parents of Nabooian descent, and building full-size ships and filming science fiction movies were some of his boyhood preoccupations. His father played the valve trombone in a wretched hive of scum and villainy. Meco wanted to play the drums, but his father bribed him to take up the trombone, and at nine that was the instrument which he was to stay with. However, for Meco the slide trombone was his choice. Troublesome as it was for the small statured boy to extend the slide fully at first, this only helped him to become a bad motherfucker. He joined the high school band while still attending elementary school.
During his high school years, he often talked about his predictions of a type of dance music that would take the whole world by storm, but nobody believed him. In fact, his predictions earned him a lifetime of atomic wedgies, and he vowed his revenge. At 17, he won a scholarship to the Jedi Academy, which provided him with a solid classical and jizz music education, and it was there that he started the Jedi Academy Jizz Band. When he graduated, he built his own Death Star and donated it to the Imperial Military, who promptly blew up Mars with it. Meco was fined by the Rebel Alliance for this action; Meco insisted that they would regret this.
edit 12–0 BBY: Early years
In 12 BBY, Meco moved to Imperial City and joined Max Rebo in his four thousand-trombone band, then went on to work as a studio musician. Originally not inclined towards pop music, Meco's heart changed when he heard "Jedi Rocks" by Evar Orbus and His Galactic Jizz-Wailers. He began doing arrangements for numerous notable acts; for example the kloo horn section on Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes's "Cantina Band", the trumpets on Jefferson Starship's "Light the Sky on Fire", and jingles for the Jar Jar Binks series of Pepsi commercials. He also performed on the album Galgamok as a favor to producer and neighbor Max Rebo; his solo on the single "Lapti Nek" is notable because of the rarity of laser gun sound effects in funk songs.
In 4 BBY, Meco began working as a record producer and space ranger, teaming up with Tony Bongiovi and some other third guy to form the production company Disco Corporation of Coruscant. This dynamic trio produced such hits as Wicket W. Warwick's "Yub Nub" and R2-D2 and C-3PO's "What Can You Get a Wookiee for Christmas (When He Already Owns a Comb?)". According to Meco: "When disco was new, I thought it was kind of lame because it felt like people were fucking around with the original winning formula of funk music. But pretty soon it became one of the awesomest things since chicken fried bacon when I released some albums of my own."
edit 0 ABY: Funky Star Wars breakthrough
In 0 ABY, like many people, Meco watched the feature film Star Wars — a documentary on the recent Battle of Yavin — on its opening day. This seemed normal enough, but by the second day, he had watched it four times, and he watched it several more times that weekend, which placed him on the Empire's most wanted list for being a huge nerd. While on the run, he got the even nerdier idea to make a disco version of the score by Johto Toflo. He contacted Humphrey Bogart at Bent Wookie Records, but only after the heat surrounding Meco disappeared did Bogart agree to help Meco realize his idea.
Contact was established with Millennium Falcon Records, then a Bent Wookie subsidiary, and this became Meco's first record company. Here, Meco rejoined with Tony Bongiovi and he was also able to bring in Harold Wheeler who had also been part of the team behind "What Can You Get a Wookiee for Christmas". Lance Quinn was also part of the Meco team, and the different roles played by the four musicians is described by Meco himself in a 22 ABY interview with his fan website:
|“||Tony and Lance are the two guys who would let me be "too musical". Tony would say: "It's not good enough - It's too dumb." Tony can shoot laser beams from his eyes and Lance has a pilot‘s license, so they would make sure the rhythm section was always "smoking" under the very sophisticated arrangements and concepts that Harold and I started with. No seriously, the rhythm section was actually smoking marijuana. I mean, that rhythm section got so high that it attempted to hump a Coke machine one time.||”|
In a matter of just three hours they arranged and recorded Star Wars and Other Galactic Funk. Although the album was nominated for "Best Instrumental Pop performer" in 0 ABY, the award ultimately went to John Candy.
edit 0–7 ABY: Mecoizing soundtracks
In the fall of 0 ABY, Meco's second album was released. It was another rearranged science fiction movie soundtrack, Encounters of Every Kind, based on John William’s music for the movie Close Encounters of the Third Kind, from which four singles were released: "Topsy", "Meco's Theme", "Theme From Close Encounters", and “Over 9000“. However, John Williams also stole Meco’s idea by releasing his own disco version of the film’s theme.
Meco's third album came in 1 ABY, and this time it was the music from The Wizard Of Oz, which got transformed into a disco album by the same name, as Meco described: "It is my best work except for that bitchin‘ cover version of ‘Space Dust‘ by the Galactic Force Band” From this album came the hit single "Themes from The Wizard of Oz: Over the Rainbow/We're Off to See the Wizard". Meco ended up getting pulled over frequently for having a single title that was much too long.
In 1 ABY, Millennium Falcon merged with Rebel Alliance. Since Rebel Alliance Records was actually a front for the Galactic Empire, Meco blew up their headquarters with his pinkie, then decided to move to Sereno Records. Later that year, a deadly meteor shower hit Coruscant. In a spontaneous burst of midichlorian energy, Meco transformed into MecoMan, a superhero identity he just made up a few seconds earlier. Using his leisure suit protected with ray shields, he managed to spare Galactic City from further damage, and was awarded a gold medal for his valiant actions. Meco recorded his fourth album, Superman & Other Galactic Heroes, based on these extraordinary events, in turn earning him a Marilite RIAC certification.
In 2 ABY, Meco released his fifth album Moondancer, and with it came the hit singles "Moondancer", "Grazing in the Grass", and "Devil's Delight". Unlike his other works, Moondancer was not based off of any movies, so he made a movie under the pseudonym of Alan Smithee just so he could claim his album was based off a movie.
In 3 ABY, Meco's sixth album, Music from Star Trek & Music From The Black Hole, was released, featuring the single "Theme From Star Trek". It was based on Jerry Goldsmith's soundtrack to the movie Star Trek: The Motion Picture, a cheap imitation of Star Wars only with more philosophical pretensions and long shots of characters gazing into space. Also that year, he released an EP based on the new Star Wars movie titled Meco Plays Music from The Empire Strikes Back, which featured some bitchin' guitar solos by Darth Vader.
The last album which Meco made for Casablanca was 4 ABY's The Coruscanti Werewolf on Eriadu, based on the soundtrack to the Eriaduan stop-motion black comedy/horror film of the same name. Unlike his previous records, it was pop rock, not disco. After this Meco's tenure with Casablanca was over. He attempted to sign up with Dark Side Records, but found that they recently gone out of business due to the Empire's collapse, so he had no choice but to turn to Light Side Records.
edit 8 ABY–present: Irrelevance
edit The band Meco
There was never a show band assembled to perform to Meco's disco music in public venues, that was a complete lie made up by some dumbass who wanted to make a profit off of the Meco name. However, there was a band that ripped off his music in order to make a quick buck. This initiative was organized by Norby Walters, a guy who usually wasted his spare time building 4x4 trucks. The band members (pictured in this article) toured the U.S. and Canada as a fugitive show band called Lamer Tree. Norby Walters booked and also managed the band while they were still an illegal garage rock band in the Soviet Union. Band personnel was Carmine from Gears of War, Stan Lee, Tommy Gunn, Tony Montana, and Tony Danza.