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For those without comedic tastes, the "questionable parody" of this website called Wikipedia have an article about MechQuest.

MechQuest is, apparently, Artix Entertainment's prequel to DragonFable, which is a prequel to AdventureQuest. It is believed this is yet another continuation of the hypnosis project set forth in the previous games. Due to a lack of new and fresh souls to fuel the hellfires of the Artix Entertainment headquarters, they assumed a new approach to this game, described below.

edit MechQuest Plotline

MechQuest is set to take place 4,995 years before the events in DragonFable. It is believed the intent behind this is to confuse the public and to remove the legitimacy behind accusations of blatant and obvious plotholes in the game. In addition, this game has also attempted strange tie-ins with its predecessor games, leading many people to believe that eventually the society of MechQuest will give up using advanced technology in favor of a return to the Dark Ages.

The game places you as an average, everyday student at a secret government facility (under the clever guise of a university) called G.E.A.R.S. (Get Easily Ass Raped Society) University. You are eventually charged with tasks by the dictatorial leader in charge of this facility, who calls himself "Dean Warlic", to fight an evil menace known as the Shadowscythes, a downtrodden and vastly unpopular metal band which turned to a violent life of crime with mechs.

edit Your Character

The game allows you to create either a male or female character. Instead of armors, as AdventureQuest and DragonFable provided you with, you are instead given a large mech.

The mech functions as your method of transport and battle. Unfortunately, it does not have a functional restroom, which has been the cause of many pilot ejections in combat due to a bad case of explosive diarrhea.

edit Mech Equipment

In various stores in the game, you can obtain extra weaponry to place onto your mech. There are many kinds of equipment to add onto your mech, such as large machine guns to cause damage to enemy mechs, missile launchers to cause damage to enemy mechs, and laser cannons to cause damage to enemy mechs.

These weapons can be added to any part of the body you desire, including the shoulders, arms, ears, forehead, chest, and groin (this location has been especially favored by players due to the recent addition of the "Crotch LAZ0R" weapon, which outdamages all other laser-based weapons in the game).

Strangely enough, the mechs have no need for anything that a real mech might need, such as fuel tanks, cooling units, and stability controls. However, it has been suggested that MechQuest's mechs do not need these systems because a wizard did it.

edit Gameplay and Combat

The game has a relatively complex gameplay, especially within the combat system. In combat while out of your mech, you are given a grand total of two buttons for attack and one button for defense. This very difficult system of combat tends to make most players struggle against even the simplest of monsters.

In addition, combat gets even more difficult when inside your mech. You are offered several different attack buttons based on the number of weapons on your mech. Oddly enough, many players seem to find this form of combat easier than the physical combat mentioned prior. This could be because they find the pretty explosions much more entertaining, and it encourages them to spam buttons at random in the percieved illusion that they are accomplishing something.

General gameplay outside of combat consists of of a walk-around system in the game's main town. There, you can meet many interesting and unique NPCs, all of whom dress the same, have exactly one thing to say at any given time, and serve no function beyond allowing you to challenge them to a duel (see:Yu-Gi-Oh).

edit Primary NPCs


Real Joker.

The game has a large variety of NPCs, as described below.

edit Tek

A woman wielding a large wrench which is believed to be owned by her far more mechanically competent husband, who hasn't been seen since their last argument regarding a possible divorce. She sells you sleazy and worn equipment bought off of the Black Market and E-Bay. She owns a "pet" cat-fairy thing, which is the actual owner of the store, so any charges for how horrendously dangerous the store is and the black marketing goes towards the poor creature.

edit Dean Warlic

The head of a secret government organization hiding beneath the guise of a university known as G.E.A.R.S. University. His job is to train "students" at this "university" to become better mech pilots so that eventually, he can begin his quest for conquering the galaxy. Many of his underlings have been known to call him an "iron-fisted prick", but never to his face. Rumor has it that he may, in fact, be the wizard who did it.

edit Sys-Zero

This man is a rogue pilot who has been known to taunt his enemies over the main radio before shooting them down. Some of the insults on record include "porkbelly", "wendigo", "knigget", and "kitten-huffer". Recently, due to an malfunction in his ship which mislabeled his allies as foes, he was court-martialed and sentenced to jailtime for shooting down several members of his own unit and "caling dem meen naems ;_;".

edit Kingadent Slugwrath

....his name is "Slugwrath". Everyone knows that slugs are incapable of feeling wrath. Nothing more needs to be said. He has the title of a 'Kingadent' which is clearly something he made up to get the loyal followers around the government facility to praise him.

edit Chief Duncan

A very odd man who is head of the city's police. Investigative reports suggest that he was the original owner of the unsuccessful donut joint known as "Duncan Donuts". He was removed as the company president (the company promptly changed its name to "Dunkin' Donuts") following charges of sexual harrassment leveled on him by the restaurant appliances.

edit (Don't Forget) Joker

Hm... This guy is very interesting... He joins MechQuest in April Fool's Day. Kinda mysterious and uh... purplish on his face.

edit Criticism


See? Even the game menus are different.

MechQuest's administration have received numerous complaints for a variety of reasons.

edit MechQuest is Not the Same as DragonFable

Many of the game's players have made the accusation that the game's similar battle structure and menus suggest that MechQuest is nothing more than a reuse of the same game engine that DragonFable used. Obviously, these people are total noobs. This game is completely unlike DragonFable because instead of using swords and axes and daggers to kill monsters, you use guns and missiles and PEWPEWLAZ0RS to kill monsters. And you walk around in large metal mechs instead of large metal armors. Obviously, this suggests that MechQuest is a completely different game.

edit Lack of RPG Content

Some players of the game have noticed that while the game has a leveling and experience system, many of the critical elements of an RPG are missing from the game. In addition, some people claim it unfair that levels have very little true significance in the game, since your mech's hit points and energy level are independant of your character's level. This had led many people to go so far as to claim that MechQuest is not a "true RPG".

Artix Entertainment continues to claim that eventually, such functions will be added. "But first," they insist, "we have weeks of new filler content to add. And there'll be more mechs, with BIGGER GUNS!" This tends to silence these doubts.

edit Nova Gems

A currency introduced into MechQuest that is similar to DF's "Dragon Coins", in that they are the best currency in the game but are typically very expensive to purchase. Many players have complained that their inability to buy Nova Gems puts them at a disadvantage against enemy mechs in the game. Artix Entertainment insists that this is untrue, and that they would feel better about their suckiness if they just bought more Nova Gems.

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