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Young fattie

Typical restaurant customers

The Corporation McDonald's it's a fusty food chain (or "fast food" for the bribed governments), which aims to reach people through unethical techniques to achieve that people consume their products high in fat and made with dubious ingredients. They have headquarters, restaurants or whatever you imagine, all around the world and coming soon the universe. It's a fact that there's no place without a McDonald's or at least one nearby.[1]

The restaurant chain sells hamburgers, french fries (Mine with mayo!), chicken, milkshakes, and others synthetic crap. Recently at the request of protestant anarquist environmental groups, they included in the menu "healthy food", like salads and fruits (just don't be fooled, it's so greasy and bad for the body as normal food).

A little bit of history...=

The so called evil operations started in 1940 with a pair of brothers named Super Mc. Bros. in San Bernardino, Calixforma, a rustic place in the old Route 66[2], in that place they served BBQ food with more putrefaction than the actual.

Years before in nasty food market led by Another Castle[3], they decided to enter and expand to hamburguers. Their hamburguers where the first to contain additives that make them irresistible, many experts call them "zombie makers" (or McZombis).

A guy named Ray "Richie" Kroc he offered to join the brothers business and finally like any jewish he bought the millonarie franchise.[4] He installed the central base of the multinational, called McDonald's Park in Oak, Brooks, where currently there are parties and thousands of fat people (what do you expect? They are paid with free hamburgers) [5]



McDonald's sanitary engineer, ensuring that the meat is fresh ...

Do you want McRats with that|McJob|Employee|the menu}} McDonald's simply sells hamburguers[6], obviously made with rat meat and not beef chemically modified.

According to sources the company uses rat meat, the toxins that develop, produce over time irreversible damage to health, or superpowers if you live in Smallville. To read the entire article, give me a Like on my Facebook page.|Idiot|Conspirator User|Facebook.

Jumbo nyanko burger

The Hello Heart Attack Burger, with cheese.

They also sell le french fries, acohol[7], Chicken McNuggets and even glue (or McCheese).

All this with a excellent quality control, well, though no one is watching the creation of the patty, it's not known that an incident has occurred in three days, a record!

Happy Meal

The Happy Meal it's a lie, "that does not make you happy", even it doesn't come with ketchup.|Emo|suicide It's a box full with "evilness" (like the Pandora's Box) and a toy (made specifically by a horde of Chinese working all day making the toys) and one of the reasons that kids want to go to the restaurant. All the box content it's made of plastic, not only the toy, but also the food.

Business archetype or activities under the shadow

The McDonald's are everywhere and seeing one is as common as air pollution and the girl next door, this is because they try to achieve a single monopoly where people only go to the restaurant, which is impossible because we will end up like in the movie WALL-E or worse. [8]

Other business

The company also have other types of restaurants along the popular fast food place, we talk about the McCafee (a cheaper copy of StarBucks), a place visited by work slaves, that want a normal "coffe" (with additives that make you don't stop for asking more)[9]

The McDonald's Drive Thru, it's know and visited by lazy people all around the globe. That means you have the opportunity of eat their greasy food without leaving your car, they know how hard is for someone that only eats fast food get out of his car to order food, the only bad thing, it doesn't include toilets (are you in that level of laziness?)[10]

McDonald Douglas

Aa191 ohare

American Airlines Flight 191, a DC-10 manufactured by McDonald-Douglas, fully configured in "roller-coaster mode". Note that the left engine has been ejected to provide for a more fun and exciting experience.

In the 1960s, McDonald's acquired the aircraft manufacturer Douglas to apply its McPrinciples to use in the airline industry. After the merger, McDonald Douglas manufactured several new and McCheap McProducts, benefiting the McAirlineIndustry greatly. These McProducts included the state-of-the-art-at-crashing airliner DC-10, which cost only a nickel to build and included a mini-McDonald's restaurant on every plane. Pilots flying these planes will enjoy the full benefits of a delicious McMeal and enter a lengthy break from the duties of flying the plane. But they won't have to worry about their passengers --- their state-of-the-art-at-crashing aircraft has an autopilot so sophisticated that it could fly itself into the ground or ocean! Just press a button and the cargo door will automatically blow off the aircraft, instantly turning the plane into a highly fun and enjoyable McRollerCoaster!

McDonald Douglas is also benefiting the McDonald's ground industry by providing for rapid transportation of fresh, farm-produced food. All McDonald Douglas aircraft now has a built-in on board McHeater in the cargo hold where your hamburgers are held. These McHeaters will preheat your hamburgers at 30,000 feet to around 400 degrees Fahrenheit smoked with premium aviation fuel, providing for an rich and rewarding taste.

How a McDonald's is born?


First step destroy nature.

Have you ever seen a McDonald's under construction or at least in their stage of development? Of course not! They are easier and fast to build, more than Flash, your girlfriend ex.boyfriend (We know, you're alone), and faster than the development of an EA's game. You only have to follow this 3 simples steps:

  1. First you to place a seed with a M shape.[11]
  2. Later is watered, use a McWateringCan.
  3. Wait as the building begins to grow and are created magically managers and consumers.

That's all folks! It's easy. You never will destroy one.[12]



Food received by employees of McDonald's.

The employees that work there are cybernetic androids made with human DNA (that's why they are so helpful)[13] All the human employees are send to capsules, a machine copies their body and a engineer build the android, supported by government and its institutions.

Their salary it's small, they're robots, you know (the smallest salary ever), they are at the cash register, cook in the kitchen [14], clean the tables and torturing kids[15]. If an accident occurs they would bring up their bionic hands with laser guns (in the style of Transformers) burning everything.[16]


The company has been known for having endless characters that advertise the chain, they are worse than the Taco Bell Chihuahua[17]. Some people think that they're funny, but luckily we don't.


He's the first Ronald, we know what are you thinking, and yes, he rape some childrens.

Ronald McDonald

Template:Principal Article Ronald McDonald it's the favorite clown of all kids, yay!, he's weird, but it's funny, what?, is he a jerk? OK, we all know the red and yellow clown, the supposed leader of McDonald's and future president of the country... sorry, the wor...universe. He was created with the purpose of entertaining brain-washed kids. There were several related scandals, one of the most famous is that this clown, in his homeworld, McDonaldland (soon to be a planet, ours) he was happy with several friends like Birdie, the Burglar and whoever. But a in a cloudy day he killed everyone, and apparently the police arrested him. [18]

A day in the happy character's life it's very busy, he lives in a McDonald's. In the morning her clock flies away (that's normal for him, he don't smoke), later he takes a shower, but he discover that someone already took it, in the evening he launders his money, and in the end of the day he reads stories to children.[19]


Ronald went out of fashion.


I'm a happy meal that could go to space... because I'm happy|McDonald's|Happy|himself


Here's Happy....

One person came up with the idea that Ronald McDonald don't help childrens to loose weight, so he wanted delete him from the world. Many brain-washed kids didn't want this. McDonald's can't control anymore this, while the clown attrac kids to the restaurant, he has no moral values that all complain. The kids power it's big, and unfortunately he failed. Anyway, he tried to create a (terrible) new mascot to see if the kids likes him and forget Ronald.

Happy (also know as Creepy), it's the new psychotic McDonald's mascot. Acording to the company the plan is to cheer up the childrens, mision failed, he's sacary not happy or funny. Many believe that their ultimate achievement is to kill us, the physical condition of him it's better than the heavyweight Ronald. The recommendation is if you're in a restaurant, don't ask anything to Happy, he could become crazy and you will not like what happens next.

Main competitors of McDonald's







  1. [ Many fat people in America, Fatpeople dot com. 28/12/13
  2. Like the Pixar movie.
  3. Sorry Mario but the BigMac is in Another Castle.
  4. He used 19 wallets.
  5. Source: Dick J. Smith, former employee of McDonald's Canada who never travel to USA.
  6. Oh! I luv hamburguers!!!
  7. Search in Google German McDonald's
  8. Is worse because we don't believe that people are even with prudence as to create a similar ship to Axiom (the one from the film), it's known their food also made you an idiot.
  9. In the original concept the place was going to be called McStarbuck, but that's plagiarism, they want to rename it McHipster to stoke sales
  10. It's believed that it will have in the future. Source: Dick J. Smith, former employee of McDonald's Canada who never travel to USA.
  11. The story goes that were delivered by a man in exchange for a cow, he was told they were 'magic seeds'
  12. Source: Dick J. Smith, former employee of McDonald's Canada who never travel to USA.
  13. Source: Dick J. Smith, former non-robot employee (we think so) of McDonald's Canada who never travel to USA.
  15. Source: Dick J. Smith, former employee of McDonald's Canada who love kids.
  16. Our trusty source: Dick J. Smith, former of McDonald's Canada who never killed someone.
  17. You quiero Taco Bell™
  18. The writer Stephen King adapted the mascot to create a children's novel inspired by scandals above.
  19. Satanic stories.
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