Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/May 20

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Virginmarywithmary
Bacon

May 20: Have a Vision of the Virgin Mary Day (South America and Spain), Bacon Appreciation Day (America)

  • 200 - Bacon is invented in Turkey.
  • 1492 - Christina Columbus, the illegitimate daughter of a mediocre sailor, discovers a new continent, only to have her father Christopher claim the discovery as his own.
  • 1551 - For an entire year, people make lame jokes about anagrams and dying of syphilis.
  • 1732 - Queen Victoria, the Virgin Queen, declares war on France. Again.
  • 1874 - Pope Pius IX sees the Virgin Mary on a strip of delicious bacon.
  • 1927 - Charles Lindbergh impresses two continents and wins a load of cash.
  • 1930 - A time-travelling Jimbo Wales makes an unsuccessful attempt to kill Hitler. The two later become the best of friends.
  • 1932 - Popeye is introduced to Extra Virgin Olive Oyl.
  • 1971 - Responding to the Soviet Union's announcementof the day before the BBC start legal predings for copyright violation, claiming "Mars 2 is just a cheap knock off of Button Moon".
  • 1988 - Night Court is cancelled. The suicide rate for shut-ins triples overnight.
  • 1995 - Some guy finally translates De Bello Gallico.
  • 1999 - Sophia Capicola directs the The Virgin Suicides to the delight of spaced out club kids everywhere.
  • 2004 - McCaulay Caulkin finally loses his virginity while falling from a cliff.
  • 2007 - Illegal aliens crossing the US/Mexico border see the Virgin Mary in the Bush Administration's new 10000 volt border fence.
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