From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Just what you've all been waiting for! Now you, too, can have access to man uncyclopedia from your very own Unix prompt!
Just copy the following into the file uncyclopedia.1, then copy the file (with a user with sufficient permissions) into your man1 directory within the manpage directory structure.
.nr N -1 .nr D 5 .TH uncyclopedia 1 Local .SH NAME uncyclopedia \- a superior alternative to those hacks at wikipedia .SH SYNOPSIS .B uncyclopedia [-abort|-retry|-ignore] [-search] [-edit] [-discuss] [-history] [-move] [-watch] [-blank] [-vandalize] [-lang:code] [-help] [-admin:[delete|block=user|rollback|protect]] [-random] [article] .PP su -c "pkill uncyclopedia" .PP use "uncyclopedia -help" to display a complete list of current options. .SH DESCRIPTION .\" This defines appropriate quote strings for nroff and troff .ds lq \&" .ds rq \&" .if t .ds lq `` .if t .ds rq '' .\" Just in case these number registers aren't set yet... .if \nN==0 .nr N 10 .if \nD==0 .nr D 5 .hy 0 .I Uncyclopedia is a Wiki-based encyclopedia, the basis for the design of another popular, but less complete online encyclopedia called "Wikipedia", in the same way that Microsoft's pesky .chm (HTML Help) files are an inferior alternative to man(1). .PP .I Uncyclopedia can be used to access information on all platforms that can interpret HTML into a human-readable format. Current versions of .I Uncyclopedia run on Unix, VMS, Windows 95/NT, Windows CE, BeOS, 386DOS, OS/2 EMX, MacOS 2, MacOS Y, Amiga, Commodore 64, Dynix, Minix, GNU Hurd, Etch-A-Sketch and certain versions of Abacus. .SH OPTIONS At start up, \fIUncyclopedia\fR will load the article specified on the command line. For help with locating an article, press \fB"?"\fR or \fB"H"\fR while running \fIUncyclopedia\fR. .PP \fIUncyclopedia\fR will prompt you to create a new article if the article name you provide does not yet exist. This feature is excellent for quickly creating pages about your enemies and in-jokes that only your closest imaginary friends know. .PP \fIUncyclopedia\fR provides many command-line options. Some require special privileges, others can be used by anyone at any time. These are noted in the reference below. .TP .B \-search If this argument is used, \fIUncyclopedia\fR will find the article name supplied within any article. This feature is a total waste of time, since Uncyclopedia can handle articles under every potential misspelling of every word without difficulty. .TP .B \-edit Edit an existing article. This provides an interface for changing all aspects of the article, from adding gibberish through removing content. .TP .B \-discuss \fBDeprecated\fR command is only used by administrators. Shows commentary about the named article regarding various revisions and reasons for these revisions. .TP .B \-history Shows a list of people who have modified the article and what they modified within the article. Only administrators tend to use this option, since old versions are never as good as the one you just amended with "OMG MY PENIS IS SO BIG". .TP .B \-move Quickest and easiest way to create useful redirects from random articles to other random articles in \fIUncyclopedia\fR. Regular use of this parameter ensures that nobody will ever find what they're looking for where they expect to find it. Administrators love this one. .TP .B \-watch Keep track of articles you have seen in the past or written. Proper use ensures nobody else modifies your articles, possibly changing "OMG MY PENIS IS SO BIG" to "OMG I'M A RETARD" or an inferior version of the article. .TP .B \-blank Blank an article and remove any incorrect information it might contain. Use this parameter regularly on articles about your country of origin, favorite politicians, video games, and other extremely important articles. .TP .B \-vandalize If this parameter is used, \fIUncyclopedia\fR will give you an interface that allows the quick modification of existing text to make it completely incomprehensible and remove any past, present, or future inaccuracies. .TP .B \-random Retrieve a random Zork page. .TP .B \-lang:\fBcode\fR Use this to specify your preferred language for reading and editing \fIUncyclopedia\fR. Defaults to \fBen\fR. .TP .B \-help Display quick help with common commands. .TP .B \-admin:\fB[option]\fR Controls \fIUncyclopedia\fR articles and users based on the option provided. .I delete use to remove articles that a user spent hours of hard work on to get a message on your talk page so you feel important. .I block=user this will cause most users to join the IRC channel within 30-90 seconds where they will bitch and moan about how unfair the admin was or how it was their 'friend' that changed the article so they don't deserve it. .I rollback removes the last piece of important information, thought-provoking commentary, or otherwise brilliant prose from the specified article. .I protect keeps non-administrators from making \fIUncyclopedia\fR articles better. .SH ENVIRONMENT In addition to various "standard" environment variables such as \fBNPOV\fR, \fIUncyclopedia\fR supports the following unique capabilities: .TP 10 .B HTBFANJS Directs you to a resource about writing and editing \fIUncyclopedia\fR articles. .TP .B HELP Contains information about a Beatles Album. Why you would ever want to read it is beyond the scope of this man(1) page. .TP .B VILLAGE_DUMP A powerful tool for making your voice heard by those totally heartless members of the oligarchy. .TP .B VFH Method by which you can select articles for the \fIUncyclopedia\fR Main_Page. .TP .B VFP Method by which you can select pictures to be placed on the \fIUncyclopedia\fR Main_Page. .TP .B VFD A location where you list all the best articles in \fIUncyclopedia\fR to ensure the admins know to delete them. .TP .B QVFD A location where you list all the absolute best articles in \fIUncyclopedia\fR because you want to get the admins to respond to your opinion of the article more quickly than the weeks to months it takes with the \fIVFD\fR method due to excessive red tape. .SH MAN PAGES .B man mount \- don't tell me there's nothing suspicious about that. .P .B man cat \- the end result of some process. .P .B man kill \- what you will do with me, following the statements above. .SH FILES .TP 4 .B /wiki/Main_Page Is a quick starting point for \fIUncyclopedia\fR. This is the default article shown if none is selected on the command line. .SH SEE ALSO .hy 0 allman(1), spork(8), whatis(1), wikipedia(2) .hy 1 .SH HISTORY .TP 10 4th January 2006: Dawg <Dawg@VandalHunterCave> cleaned and converted article into the output of the \fBoriginal man page\fR. .TP 23rd December 2005: CaptainSpam <captainspam@obligatory> resisted urge to add '-version', instead added '-random' option. .TP 20th December 2005: Dawg <Dawg@VandalHunterCave> added a great deal of additional information, including parameters and new features in the latest version of Uncyclopedia. .TP 14th December 2005: h2g2bob <h2g2bob@uranus> is responsible for unleashing this on the world. Shame on him.