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Today's Featured Article -

Recently featured: Georges Danton

Yesterday's Featured Article - Georges Danton

GeorgesDanton4

Georges Jacques Danton (26 October 1759 – 5 April 1794) was a leader of the French Revolution who was even uglier than the actor who once played him in a French movie.

Danton today is seen as a 'hero' of France. Streets and battleships are named after this Jacobin responsible for the deaths of Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette. Even guard dogs carry the name of the man who helped to define France's big leap from monarchy into anarchy. (more...)

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Flying toasters, featured on 8 December 2014. See the featured version.
Romance of the Three Kingdoms, featured on 8 December 2012. See the featured version.
UnScripts:Good Dog/Bad Dog, featured on 8 December 2011. See the featured version.

Did you know...

Icecream6gyfc2
  • ...that "crack" is the hood's most effective diet pill? (pictured)
  • ...that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
  • ...that people who "have their cake and eat it too" are 10 times more likely to die of obesity than people who only "have their cake"?
  • ...that although the effects of alternative medicine are difficult to separate from a placebo, dumb hippies are easy to separate from their money?
  • ...that a bird in the hand is better than crabs in your bush?
  • ...that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted?
  • ...that in a world where movie trailers are crucial to a film's success... one man will provide his voice in innumerable trailers?

In the news:

On this day...

DalaiLlama

December 8: Llamas Against Chinese day/ The Death of Metal

  • 1000 BCE - A little Chinese Prince was holidaying in Tibet. Whilst he was innocently trying to feed a local Llama some grain it viciously bit him. And so began countless millenniums of conflict.
  • 684 - Tibetan Llamas eat all the grass so that when the Mongolians tried to invade there was nothing for their horses to eat. First example of Llama scorched earth tactics.
  • 751 - Chinese invade Tibet again. The Chinese strike a deal with the Llamas, they will have a singing competition and whoever wins gets sovereignty over Tibet. First instance of the Llama song, thousands of Chinese soldiers get nasty nips from vicious Llamas in their victory celebrations.
  • 1231 - The Dalai Llama seduces Chinese king, but after they'd been going steady for a couple of months the Llama cheats on him with Kublai Khan. Chinese king calls the Llama a slut and finds a less attractive rebound girlfriend and cries himself to sleep for a month.
  • 1567- The Dalai Llama tells all the other Central Asian leaders that the Chinese King is gay. This does not have the negative connotations that it does in the West so the Dalai Llama also said the King had sex with young boys.
  • 1789 - Llama blah blah blah Tibet blah China. Blah blah blah China blah Llama. Llama breaks China's grandmother's hip and takes the last bit of Cheesecake.
  • 1850 - Llama tells Hong Xiuquan that if he's sick of the buses running late he should start a revolution. So begins Taiping Rebellion.
  • 1911 - Llama tells Sun Yat-sen and Yuan Shikai that the Chinese Emperor said that their mothers were terrible cooks.
  • 1931 - Llama mentions to Emperor Hirohito that China is pretty shit and that he might as well go in and take over. Then he whispered quietly in the Emperor's ear that if any Japanese are looking for easy women Nanking is the place.
  • 1950 - PRC takes over Tibet suffering many painful Llama bites.
  • 1980 - Mark David Chapman, aided by a llama, kills John Lennon.
  • 2001 - In a secret coup d'etat the Llamas topple the Illuminati, the Skull and Bones Club and the Jews and assume de facto secret leadership of the world. And when China least expects it ... POW!!! Right in the kisser with a big Llama bite.
  • 2003- lLAMAS TAKE OVER WIKIPEDIEA AND USE IT TO BAD MOUTH CHINA TO THE WORLD
  • 2005- Jeff from accounting nailed your wife in the parking lot at that company christmas party.

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Vaderguild

Never underestimate the power of the dwarf.

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