19:45 (cur) . . (+1,005) . . Cheesecurd(talk | contribs)(Created page with " If you like white kids, have I got the place for you. ''' == History == ''' ---- In 1963, the school was built on a garbage dump which explains a lot. In 1973, the NCA ra...")
19:37 (cur) . . (+1,007) . . Cheesecurd(talk | contribs)(Created page with " If you like white kids, have I got the place for you. ''' == History == ''' ---- In 1963, the school was built on a garbage dump. Yeah. A garbage dump. In 1973, the NCA r...")
657 - Battle of Siffin. Theys was Diffin, yo. No I'm sayn, Bitch?
790 - The practice of "back handing" starts in Europe as a cure for the women talking. It has a success rate of 80%.
810 - The practice of "back handing" ends in Europe as reports of excessive clean houses increases.
1521 - Famed prophet Nostradamus predicts that the King of England will have an affair and take the Queen of France as his mistress.
1524 - Nostradamus's house gets egged by an angry mob as they find his prediction to be wrong and that the King of England does not take the Queen of France as his mistress, but the Prince of Germany.
1536 - King Henry VIII of England takes Punch Your Girlfriend day to new extremes, by killing two of his wives.
1590 - Martin Luther changes his "100 Thesis" to the "99 Thesis" by deleting the sentence, "Priests are not to be allowed to have relations with children."
1792 - The Whiskey Rebellion is lost as George Washington and his troops march to fight off rebels while they were drunk singing "99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer. We take one down, pass it around, and 98 bottles of beer on the wall..."
1812 - The War of 1812 starts as an 18 year old young British boy gets in a fist fight with a 12 year old American. The two nations get involved as they send reinforcements to help the children.
1834 - The whoopie cushion is invented as a seat cover, but does not sell well for making "sounds of unwanted body gases."
1870 - The typewriter is invented with only the keys Ctrl, Alt, and Delete.
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!
Seriously, we love you.
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.
Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many monthsyears to come!
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!