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Today's featured article

Iran-you-are-next

October 2, 2014

+-     15:45 User:Nikau/Jizzlam‎‎ (33 changes | hist) . . (+2,120)‎ . . [Nikau‎ (33×)]
     15:45 (cur | prev) . . (+18)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs) (Beliefs: )
     15:39 (cur | prev) . . (+3)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs) (Beliefs: )
     15:34 (cur | prev) . . (-4)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs) (Beliefs: )
     15:33 (cur | prev) . . (-44)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs) (Beliefs: )
     15:24 (cur | prev) . . (-9)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs) (Jizzlamic extremism: )
     15:24 (cur | prev) . . (+473)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs) (Jizzlamic extremism: )
     15:12 (cur | prev) . . (+1)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs)
     15:09 (cur | prev) . . (+173)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs) (Jizzlamic extremism: )
     15:05 (cur | prev) . . (+12)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs)
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     14:54 (cur | prev) . . (-16)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs)
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     13:58 (cur | prev) . . (+27)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs)
     13:56 (cur | prev) . . (+150)‎ . . Nikau (talk | contribs)
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      15:44 User talk:Llwy-ar-lawr‎ (diff | hist) . . (+541)‎ . . Llwy-ar-lawr (talk | contribs) (UnSignpost in-terview: )
+-N    15:39 User:Hesper Green‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (+430)‎ . . [Hesper Green‎ (2×)]
     15:39 (cur | prev) . . (+344)‎ . . Hesper Green (talk | contribs)
N    15:30 (cur) . . (+86)‎ . . Hesper Green (talk | contribs) (Created page with "The world is a circle a computer is square put them together and get porn everywhere.")
+-N    15:20 UnPoetia:One fish two fish dead fish jew fish‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (+993)‎ . . [Hesper Green‎ (2×)]
     15:20 (cur | prev) . . (+1)‎ . . Hesper Green (talk | contribs) (One Fish Two Fish Dead Fish Jew Fish: )
N    15:19 (cur) . . (+992)‎ . . Hesper Green (talk | contribs) (The Story of the fish in the sea that has a happy ending)
      14:52 (Upload log) . . Nikau (talk | contribs) uploaded ''File:Sexyhijab.jpg'' ‎
      14:01 User talk:Gerrycheevers‎ (diff | hist) . . (+149)‎ . . SPIKE (talk | contribs) (Who knew: new section)
+-     14:01 User talk:RadicalX‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (+301)‎ . . [RadicalX‎; SPIKE‎]
     14:01 (cur | prev) . . (+58)‎ . . RadicalX (talk | contribs) (The RadicalX?: )
     13:56 (cur | prev) . . (+243)‎ . . SPIKE (talk | contribs) (The RadicalX?: new section)
 N    13:56 User talk:Killercustard‎ (diff | hist) . . (+2,804)‎ . . SPIKE (talk | contribs) (Welcome)
      13:53 Uncyclopedia:VFH/Cafeteria food‎ (diff | hist) . . (+174)‎ . . SecondChanceForMe (talk | contribs) (←Voted for)
+-N    13:50 User:Killercustard‎‎ (3 changes | hist) . . (+170)‎ . . [Killercustard‎ (3×)]
     13:50 (cur | prev) . . (+111)‎ . . Killercustard (talk | contribs)
     13:49 (cur | prev) . . (+4)‎ . . Killercustard (talk | contribs)
N    13:48 (cur) . . (+55)‎ . . Killercustard (talk | contribs) (Created page with " == Shrek is Love == Shrek is a love, Shrek is Life")
      13:39 Uncyclopedia:Poo Lit Surprise‎ (diff | hist) . . (+81)‎ . . RadicalX (talk | contribs) (Best Article: )
+-     13:36 User:RadicalX/Transfat‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (+168)‎ . . [RadicalX‎ (2×)]
     13:36 (cur | prev) . . (+92)‎ . . RadicalX (talk | contribs) (Legacy: )
     13:35 (cur | prev) . . (+76)‎ . . RadicalX (talk | contribs) (Weird Al Yankovic: )

(continued...)

Recently featured: Gay Pride - Super Smash Bros: Xtreme Beach Volleyball - Ernest Hemingway's Cookery Corner - See Dick - Neolithic Age

Did you know...

*...that food is probably the most addictive substance known to man?
    • ...that withdrawal symptoms include nausea, hallucinations and possibly death?
      • ...that the reason the government does not ban it is because of the tax money it gets from the food industry?
  • ...that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
  • ...that food is probably the most addictive substance known to man?
    • ...that withdrawal symptoms include nausea, hallucinations and possibly death?
      • ...that the reason the government does not ban it is because of the tax money it gets from the food industry?
  • ...that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
  • ...that food is probably the most addictive substance known to man?
    • ...that withdrawal symptoms include nausea, hallucinations and possibly death?
      • ...that the reason the government does not ban it is because of the tax money it gets from the food industry?

In the news

Flirt au Bord de la Mer.jpg



On this day...

Oday

October 2: Orgasm Day

  • 1835 - The Texas Revolution begins where the Mexican soldiers attempt to disarm the people of Gonzales, Texas to stop them reaching orgasm, but encounter stiff resistance from a hastily assembled pornography stockpile.
  • 1870 - The Great Tomato War begins
  • 1876 - Six women are killed in test of first steam-powered vibrator. It's inventor, Havelock Schtumpf, is never seen again.
  • 1889 - In Colorado, Nicholas Creede strikes it rich during the last great orgasm boom of the American old west.
  • 1919 - US President Woodrow Wilson reaches orgasm and suffers a massive stroke, leaving him partially paralyzed.
  • 1924 - The Geneva Protocol is adopted as a means to strengthen the length of male orgasm.
  • 1949 - 500,000 male steel workers win improved retirement benefits, orgasms.
  • 1956 - The beginning of the great orgasm shortage.
  • 1966 - The orgasm shortage ends, around 2 billion people all orgasm at the same time, vibrating the earth closer to the sun by around 500 miles. Scientists predict a slow and steady increase in global temperature.
  • 1985 - I invent the orgasm. Repeatedly. With your mom.
  • 1986 - Your Mum jokes get old. Again.
  • 1995 - Someone in Paris orgasms. Rioting ensues.
  • 1996 - Furbies debut, eating the souls of the overpriveledged.
  • 2013 - Chuck Norris orgasms, man is wiped out.

Today's featured picture

Floatingpancake

THIS IMAGE is too crappy to be featured. Eat it today.

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Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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