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Today's featured article

Iran-you-are-next

August 4, 2015

+-     12:00 UnNews:Sinaloa dance cartel wins Juarez turf war‎‎ (3 changes | hist) . . (-118)‎ . . [Spike‎; Smuggler‎ (2×)]
     12:00 (cur | prev) . . (-357)‎ . . Spike (talk | contribs) (Personal bibliography does not belong in UnNews)
     01:25 (cur | prev) . . (0)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:05 (cur | prev) . . (+239)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
+-     11:59 UnNews:Sinaloa Dance Cartel Faces Bigger Challenges‎‎ (11 changes | hist) . . (-256)‎ . . [Spike‎; Smuggler‎ (10×)]
     11:59 (cur | prev) . . (-377)‎ . . Spike (talk | contribs) (Personal bibliography does not belong in UnNews)
     01:23 (cur | prev) . . (-5)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:20 (cur | prev) . . (0)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs)
     01:19 (cur | prev) . . (+14)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs)
     01:18 (cur | prev) . . (+54)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs)
     01:16 (cur | prev) . . (+57)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs)
     01:13 (cur | prev) . . (+1)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs)
     01:13 (cur | prev) . . (0)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:13 (cur | prev) . . (0)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:12 (cur | prev) . . (0)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:12 (cur | prev) . . (0)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
+-     11:59 UnNews:NYC gang sweep nets Sinaloa Dance Cartel‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (-66)‎ . . [Smuggler‎; Spike‎]
     11:59 (cur | prev) . . (-378)‎ . . Spike (talk | contribs) (Personal bibliography does not belong in UnNews)
     01:11 (cur | prev) . . (+312)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
+-     11:58 UnNews:Sinaloa Dance Cartel hiring fair‎‎ (4 changes | hist) . . (+563)‎ . . [Spike‎; Smuggler‎ (3×)]
     11:58 (cur | prev) . . (-378)‎ . . Spike (talk | contribs) (Personal bibliography does not belong in UnNews)
     01:10 (cur | prev) . . (0)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:09 (cur | prev) . . (+67)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:08 (cur | prev) . . (+874)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs)
+-     11:58 UnNews:Sinaloa Dance Cartel member held‎‎ (3 changes | hist) . . (+128)‎ . . [Spike‎; Smuggler‎ (2×)]
     11:58 (cur | prev) . . (-378)‎ . . Spike (talk | contribs) (Personal bibliography does not belong in UnNews)
     01:07 (cur | prev) . . (+215)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
     01:06 (cur | prev) . . (+291)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
+-     11:57 UnNews:Well armed dancers lose battles but raise fears of open dance warfare in Mexico‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (-280)‎ . . [Smuggler‎; Spike‎]
     11:57 (cur | prev) . . (-328)‎ . . Spike (talk | contribs) (Personal bibliography does not belong in UnNews)
     01:04 (cur | prev) . . (+48)‎ . . Smuggler (talk | contribs) (Sources: )
  m   11:55 Uncyclopedia:Votes for deletion‎ (diff | hist) . . (+70)‎ . . Romartus (talk | contribs) ({{VFDn|Octavarium}}: )
      11:48 (Block log) . . Romartus (talk | contribs) blocked 108.176.153.211 (talk) with an expiry time of 3 months(Not banned enough yet)
+-     11:26 Category:Childish Misogynistic Humor‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (0)‎ . . [183.87.60.178‎; Romartus‎]
 m   11:26 (cur | prev) . . (-11)‎ . . Romartus (talk | contribs) (Reverting edit (what's with the number?))
     11:09 (cur | prev) . . (+11)‎ . . 183.87.60.178 (talk) (8380976261)
      09:45 User:EStop‎ (diff | hist) . . (+52)‎ . . EStop (talk | contribs) (Handy links: add VFD new month)
      09:27 User talk:LiamTheMcCluskey‎ (diff | hist) . . (+538)‎ . . EStop (talk | contribs) (Specifics: Userspaced.)
      09:21 (Move log) . . EStop (talk | contribs) moved page A-10 Thunderbolt II to User:LiamTheMcCluskey/A-10 Thunderbolt II without leaving a redirect ‎(Userspaced, stub.)
+-     08:48 Afghanistan‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (0)‎ . . [EStop‎; Roile‎]
 m   08:48 (cur | prev) . . (+1)‎ . . EStop (talk | contribs) (Revert edit to featured article.)
     07:09 (cur | prev) . . (-1)‎ . . Roile (talk | contribs)
+-     08:32 Sitting Bull‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (0)‎ . . [108.176.153.211‎; EStop‎]
 m   08:32 (cur | prev) . . (+1,019)‎ . . EStop (talk | contribs) (Revert IP edit. Vandal/Blanking)
     07:41 (cur | prev) . . (-1,019)‎ . . 108.176.153.211 (talk)
+-     08:31 UnNews:Cameron scuppers EU deal for the UK‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (0)‎ . . [108.176.153.211‎; EStop‎]
 m   08:31 (cur | prev) . . (+22)‎ . . EStop (talk | contribs) (Reverted IP edit. Vandal.)
     07:35 (cur | prev) . . (-22)‎ . . 108.176.153.211 (talk)
      06:56 German Shepherd‎ (diff | hist) . . (0)‎ . . 64.180.39.169 (talk) (How to Successfully Save Yourself From a German Shepherd: )
+-     06:29 (User creation log)‎ . . [Nbfreeh‎; Xxx mlg420 xxx‎]
     06:29 . . Nbfreeh (talk | contribs) created a user account ‎
     01:03 . . Xxx mlg420 xxx (talk | contribs) created a user account ‎
      05:14 Shark‎ (diff | hist) . . (-63)‎ . . 81.99.225.228 (talk) (Origins of the shark: made a few corrections, removed some vandalism. The general state of this section is still ridiculously bad though)
+-     02:38 Noble gases‎‎ (3 changes | hist) . . (+318)‎ . . [Miley Spears‎ (3×)]
     02:38 (cur | prev) . . (+54)‎ . . Miley Spears (talk | contribs) (motto in Latin)
     02:15 (cur | prev) . . (+104)‎ . . Miley Spears (talk | contribs) (changed to NSA by suggestions)
     02:09 (cur | prev) . . (+160)‎ . . Miley Spears (talk | contribs) (The Mickey Mouse note, which repeats a statement at the beginning, is a classic comedy technique known as comic reincorporation. Please let it remain. https://books.google.com/books?id=TWtjAgAAQBAJ&pg=PA230&lpg=PA230&dq=comic+reincorporation&source=b)
      02:27 User talk:Smuggler‎ (diff | hist) . . (+276)‎ . . Spike (talk | contribs) (UnNews cross-references: new section)
+-     02:21 User talk:ScottPat‎‎ (2 changes | hist) . . (+744)‎ . . [Miley Spears‎ (2×)]
     02:21 (cur | prev) . . (+244)‎ . . Miley Spears (talk | contribs) (I changed it by your suggesiton)
     01:55 (cur | prev) . . (+500)‎ . . Miley Spears (talk | contribs) (It's a gas: new section)
      02:19 Uncyclopedia:VFH/Noble gases‎ (diff | hist) . . (+332)‎ . . Miley Spears (talk | contribs) (Comment)
      01:56 User talk:Miley Spears‎ (diff | hist) . . (+257)‎ . . Miley Spears (talk | contribs) (answer link)

(continued...)

Recently featured: Gay Pride - Super Smash Bros: Xtreme Beach Volleyball - Ernest Hemingway's Cookery Corner - See Dick - Neolithic Age

Did you know...

*...that the average human male between the ages of 13 and 18 is has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once?
    • ...and if you haven't before you just did after reading the above statement.
  • ...that [Wiki|wiki formatting]] is perfect]? It never malfunctions'!
  • ...that the average human male between the ages of 13 and 18 is has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once?
    • ...and if you haven't before you just did after reading the above statement.
  • ...that [Wiki|wiki formatting]] is perfect]? It never malfunctions'!
  • ...that the average human male between the ages of 13 and 18 is has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once?
    • ...and if you haven't before you just did after reading the above statement.


In the news

Ants1.jpg

Recent Second Front Pages: GreeceHillary!UK election

On this day...

Beheading

August 4: National Sasquatch Awareness Day (Canada)

  • 1753 - George Washington tells a lie. Universe-ending consequences ensue.
  • 1794 - At the height of the French Revolution, the common contemporary ailment of Separation Issues was first documented. (pictured)
  • 1891 - Oscar Wilde's article The Soul of Man Under Socialism is published in the Fortnightly Review. Wilde's scathing commentary on Socialism is followed up the next fortnight by a scathing treatise on women horse-drawn buggy drivers.
  • 1914 - Britain declares war on Germany, thus starting World War I. The United States insists on not getting involved in lovers' quarrels.
  • 1924 - Under the leadership of the Teletubbies, the Notre Dame Fighting Irish clinch a perfect 11-0 season with a rousing defeat of rival USC.
  • 1924 again - Diplomatic relations between Mexico and the Soviet Union are established. The trade of Tequila for Vodka enjoys brief success, but is later overshadowed by the roaring success of the furry hats and sombreros exchange.
  • 1986 - Chernobyl, a pleasantly glowing hamlet located on the beatiful Pripyat River, opens for its first tourist season.
  • 1998 - Chuck Norris, an accountant from Delaware, first encounters the term 'roundhouse', which bewilders and confuses him.

Today's featured picture


CthulhuReadyForHoliday

"Hey, guys! Where ya goin'? I'm all packed and... aaaww, shit, there goes the bus."

Image Credit: Some user
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Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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