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Today's Free Sample! Today's Featured Article - Uzbekistan Ubeki Beki Beki Beki Stan Stan, or just Ubeki for short, is a moderately sized country in the Middle East. Ubeki was discovered around 17 D.C.(During Christ) by Abdul-Mommar Mohammed-Ali-Mohed Alibaba III during times of religious conflict surrounding the wacky mishaps of Jesus's teen years. Ubeki slowly developed as a nation and converted to Islam upon its foundation. Ubeki was colonized by the British in the early 1800's. England ruled Ubeki unfairly with an iron fist until the 1957 when the Ubekian army kicked the Brits out. In the 60's, Ubeki slowly built a self-sufficient economy with its major exports being illicit Drugs such as LSD and other manufactured drugs. In the 70's Ubeki was a somewhat stable nation and coined the term, "A second world country", meaning a cross between third world and what America use to be. In the 80's, Ubeki went under many radical battles within for political control, during which the current mysterious unknown leader came into power. A common misconception about Ubeki is that it is a dictatorship, when really it is a cross between dictatorship and a democracy (a "dictocracy" or "dematorship"), as most of its people agree with its political decisions. (more...) Recently featured: Uzbekistan Archive – Vote for featured articles Yesterday's Featured Article - You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured when you become an EXCLUSIVE MEMBER. More of the best of Uncyclopedia edit More can be yours! Join today! April 25: National Obesity Appreciation Day 0 - The world's first April 25th was celebrated. Nostradamus predicts the world's first April 26th to occur a day later. He later predicts the birth of Jimbo Wales and the creation of Wikipedia, but no one believes him due to the idea of both being so stupid. 908 - A horde of plus-sized Vikings raid the east coast of Britain and set up a new IKEA store. 1301 - First known use of the phrase "I don't give a shit" thought to have been said somewhere around London, England. 1607 - Dutch Commando Dykes led by Hans Solo destroy the anchored Spanish fleet. 1847 - The last survivors of the Donner Party are out of the wilderness. Shortly after, the first McDonners resturant opens. First item on the menu: McRib. 1862 - The worlds first battery operated fork is created; two million die during its first use. 1859 - Ground is broken for the Suez Canal. Israelis and Egyptians immediately begin fighting over who owns the hole. 1915 - Australians invade Turkey, only to piss off next year. 1918 - Turks invade Australia, but have stayed permanantly to drive taxis. 1921 - Fattest US president in history, William Howard Taft, eats a steak. 1950 - The Michelin Man Ii born. 1955 - The first McDonalds is opened. 1956 - "Obesity" is a recognized health problem. 1957 - Overweight Appreciation day is upgraded to Obesity Appreciation Day, whilst Overweight Appreciation Day changes to 25th December. 1986 - First annual (and only) all-night Soviet Power Plant Workers' Tetris competition held. 1990 - Astronauts deploying the Hubble Space Telescope drop it on the way out the door, knocking it slightly out of focus. 2003 - The International Federation of Dentists cancel all appointments for the month of August, in protest that floss and tooth picks, are not bar-coded. Archived Anniversaries	edit For exclusive news coverage, get UnNews PLUS! British royals to trade new prince for Brexit deal Iran is a nillion times worse than IS says Israel Planet X to destroy Earth (pictured) Imperial First Lady speaks Jump, might as well jump Trump-Bunny for 2020 Teacher who fired bazooka inside class not sorry Stephen Hawking's Last Wish to Come True Trump buys an ice cream after twitter tantrum National Portrait Gallery shows off latest paintings Second Front Pages: Brexit • Hillary! • Trump • UK 2015 election • Greece More Current Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... That you can get Did You Know in your email if you SUBSCRIBE TODAY! ... that it has been proven beyond reasonable doubt that the reason for 50% of modern marriages ending in divorce is because those people try to go to IKEA together for a relaxing afternoon? Read More
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Exclusive PLUS member of the Month!!! GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia! Seriously, we love you. Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor. Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come! It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon! HEIL FROSTY! Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,904 articles. 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