Today's Featured Article
Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced.
and Todd "Howlin'" Lyons worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Some "Fingers" User .
Tomb of the Unknown Contributor
A minute's deletion is to be observed.
On this day...
November 28: Panic Day/Tell-someone-you-know-you-had-sex-with-someone-they-don't day
-2000 - OH GOD THE APOCALYPSE IS UPON US!
1834 - AAAAAAIIIIEE! Help! We're all going to die!
1943 - Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, they'll kill us all!
1944 - People die... and stuff...
1963 - Hundreds of thousands die in global mime protests, Mimes assume totalitarian control, only to have it crushed 3 weeks later by Vin Diesel dressed as a clown.
1967 - Holy Shit!Anna Nicole Smith.
1979 - Don't Panic
1999 - OH GOD THE APOCALYPSE IS UPON US!
2000 - Y2K kills the entire planet, annoying environmentalists throughtout the planet, users of Macs are left unharmed.
2004 - Y2K is fixed by a patch from Microsoft, life FINALLY returns to normal.
2004 - Y2K is fixed again by another patch from Microsoft, due to the complete failure of the first patch.
2004 - Y2K can be fixed (at last!) for those users who don't have Genuine Windows software (ie. most people)
2004 - Microsoft panics. What the hell can they not-fix now?
2005 - The 113th annual World Autofellatio Championship contest begins. If you have children, panic.
2006 - Celebrating 445324248432479525 seconds since people invented the tree.
2006 - Jesus has not returned to earth in his intergalactic space pod.
2006 - Person spills milk on floor
2006 - OMG! Celine Dion is playing a concert!!!!!! Nooooooooooooooooooo
2006 - Chirstopher Meloni attacks Emmy Winner Jon Stewart after being screwed once again.
2007 - K-fedex is releasing another album
2008 - Kernel Panic: Segmentation Fault ( Core Dumped)
2012 - Scientists apologize for any inconvinence previous apocolypse warnings may have caused. Claim the apocalypse is, infact, 2 years ago.
2038 - Epoch ends. The ultimate bug shows up. Still no Duke Nukem Forever.
2046 - Glucose begins his crusade against toilet paper.
2101 - All your base are belong to us!!!
2102 - All your base destroyed by tsunami.
2105 - All your base rebuilt.
2105 - All your base is destroyed again, by a can of Coca Cola. People can't be fucked to built your base again.
2105 - al;sdkfjoi;as (Aaahhhhhhh!!!! It's the end of the fucking world!!!)
2112 - Attention, all planets of the Solar Federation! We have assumed control!
2134 - Angry ticks fire out of my nipples.
2843 - Bono finally dies.
3764 - SAW 127874 is made.
The Future - Jesus returns to earth with many holo-hookers
The Future + 1 - Raptor Jesus pokévolves from Your Mom
The Future + 2 - Jesus meets Raptor Jesus and the universe implodes.
Word of the Day
Death Try to use it in conversation. Knowledge is power.
In the news
writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much).
Oscar Wilde of uncyclopedia.wikia.com die and appoint Editors -human hybrid to manage Recent News.
earwig was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died.
Jesus people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there...
Gothic The commit mass suicide, but emos nobody cares...duh...
Mourners flow through the streets of in New York fashion, melodramatic demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots.
All are wearing black armbands.
Uncyclopedians The are comitting mass seppuku.
Japanese The are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In British France, rioting ensues.
Physicists at publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed.
IITb The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives.
All the are drunk. All the Russians are Dutch . Peyote use at an alarming high among stoned .
Native Americans In the the streets are full of women wailing loudly.
middle east The have organised a drive through service.
a duh /b/ was here
If anyone cares on a day like today...
*...that every time you shoot yourself in the head, someone somewhere in the world dies?
...that Euroipods is a website giving away free ipods in return for completing offers and reffering freinds to do the same?
Protected by Sacred Ground, and our Prayers.