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Revision as of 22:51, March 30, 2006

Welcome to Uncyclopedia in Mourning,

the content-free encyclopedia that we wished Some User and Todd Lyons still edited
Rest In Peace brave souls

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Today's Featured Article
Dead sysop

In Memoriam

Is it with great sadness that Uncyclopedia must report the loss of two of the most beloved members of the Uncyclopedian Community. A day of mourning has been announced.

Todd "Howlin'" Lyons and Some "Fingers" User worked tirelessly for the betterment of others, and both in their own unique ways have improved and left their mark on the Uncyclopedia you see before you today. Their self sacrifice will long be remembered, and plans are underway to erect a fitting monument, the Tomb of the Unknown Contributor.

A minute's deletion is to be observed.

On this day...
Lost

August 2: Intentionally Give A Stranger Misleading Directions Day

  • 456 - Maurading Mongol hoardes are repeatedly given misleading directions, resulting in wide swaths of carnage being cut through unsuspecting and largely unpopulated regions of central Europe.
  • 1877 - When asked for directions by a stranger, Oscar Wilde, then at the height of his wit, searingly suggested that the stranger seek directions from his own mother.
  • 1922 - Allen Zeitgeist asks for directions to New York from Boston. Told to "turn left where the large tree used to be" the series of events that followed causes the stock mareket crash and the great depression.
  • 1939 - Tomasz Wankovszki, a Ukrainian farmer, accidentally starts World War II by sending the German army into Poland, telling them that it is actually a shortcut to Czechoslovakia.
  • 1939 - (12:22pm) Hitler refuses to order troops to stop at gas station and ask for directions; Warsaw and Krakow invaded by accident.
  • 1993 - The shocking discrepancy between male and female drivers who ask for directions is highlighted in a study by Cambridge professor Dr. Gerry von Coppenfeels.
Word of the Day
Death
Try to use it in conversation.
Knowledge is power.
In the news
  • Oscar Wilde writes a poem showing what he thinks about the deaths of Some User and Todd Lyons(he misses them very much).
  • Editors of uncyclopedia.wikia.com die and appoint earwig-human hybrid to manage Recent News.
  • Jesus was revived. But Norwegian Space Ottars mistook him for a fish and buried him in their gardens. He died.
  • Gothic people slit their wrists and write tragic poems, nothing newsworthy there...
  • The emos commit mass suicide, but nobody cares...duh...
  • Mourners flow through the streets of New York in melodramatic fashion, demonstrating, parading, blocking traffic and inciting riots.
  • All Uncyclopedians are wearing black armbands.
  • The Japanese are comitting mass seppuku.
  • The British are maintaining a stiff upper lip. In France, rioting ensues.
  • Physicists at IITb publish a paper no one could understand. Basically they wanted 1 hour of strict mourning to be observed.
  • The State Department for Social Security will NOT pay successors' pensions to the relatives.
  • All the Russians are drunk. All the Dutch are stoned. Peyote use at an alarming high among Native Americans.
  • In the middle east the streets are full of women wailing loudly.
  • The Americans have organised a drive through service.

a duh /b/ was here

UnNews – Need a shoulder to cry on? Ask Cthulhu!

If anyone cares on a day like today...
*...that it's not butter?
  • ...verb noun preposition article verb noun?
Today's featured Tombstone
John McEnroe Pong

Add a funny caption here

Image Credit: Pup
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images


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Recent Tributes

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More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about...

Writer and Noob of the Month
Wotm

Oh great....another award for Todd.....(mutters darkly)....lets all be pleased for him.....(mumble, mumble)..... It's a bird! It's a plane! It's....Todd Lyons! Blasting through his competition, Todd sails to the lead with Richard M. Stallman at his right and OCD in his head. ToddBot2000 by day and Article Mastermind by night, his genius speaks for itself.


Noobaward

"An incomparably superior human being," the Count of Monkey Crisco is known for his excellent work and knows it. Spawning such contributions as Midget cockpunching terrorists and an Evil Cookie Monster, the Count has left an indelible bootprint on the face of Uncyclopedia, forever.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners: 2005/2006


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