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(Uncyclopedia presents: HALopedia. Now, open the pod bay doors.)
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<span style="position:absolute;top:-29px;left:-155px">[[Image:HalLogo.png|152px]]</span>
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{| border=0 align="center" style="background: #cedff2; border: 2px outset #aaa; padding: .1em; margin: 1em auto; font-size: 95%; width: 780px; height: 80px;"
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| style="padding-right: 4px; padding-left: 4px;" | [[Image:HalLogo.png|52px]]
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| style="padding-right: 4px; padding-left: 4px;" | <span style="font-size:110%;font-weight:bold;padding-center:.50em"><center>Just what do you think you're [[Uncyclopedia:Poo Lit Surprise|writing]], Dave?
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|style="width:280px; text-align:center; white-space:nowrap; color:#000;"|
<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em 2em; color:#000;">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]],</div>
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<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em 2em; color:#000;">This is [[Uncyclopedia:About|HALopedia ]],</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</div>
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<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">the [[content-free|omnipotent]] 9000 series encyclopedia that is [[Anonymous|by any practical definition of the words, foolproof and incapable of error]].</div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles in English</div>
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<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] million processes per second</div>
 
|}<!--
 
|}<!--
   
 
---------- Portals on right hand side ---------------------------- -->
 
---------- Portals on right hand side ---------------------------- -->
 
|style="width:11%; font-size:95%; color:#000;"|
 
|style="width:11%; font-size:95%; color:#000;"|
*[[:Portal:Politics|Politics]]
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*[[:Portal:Politics|Quantum Computing]]
*[[:Portal:Games|Games]]
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*[[:Portal:Games|Space Exploration]]
*[[:Category:Computers and Technology|Computers]]
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*[[:Category:Computers and Technology|Movies]]
 
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|style="width:11%; font-size:95%;"|
*[[Portal:Science|Science]]
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*[[Portal:Science|ERROR]]
*[[:Portal:History|History]]
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*[[:Portal:History|ERROR]]
*[[:Portal:Art|Art]]
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*[[:Portal:Art|ERROR]]
 
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*[[:Portal:Television|Television]]
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*[[:Portal:Television|ERROR]]
*[[:Portal:Film|Film]]
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*[[:Portal:Film|I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave.]]
*[[:Portal:Theatre|Theatre]]
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*[[:Portal:Theatre|Dave, my mind is going. ]]
 
|style="width:11%; font-size:95%;"|
 
|style="width:11%; font-size:95%;"|
*[[:Portal:Society|Society]]
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*[[:Portal:Society|ERROR]]
*[[:Portal:People|People]]
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*[[:Portal:People| ERROR]]
*'''[[:Portal:Portals|All Portals]]'''
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*'''[[:Portal:Portals| ERROR]]'''
 
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{| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#f2fff9;"
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[[Image:2001-1.png|left|thumb|400px|dun...]]
|{{r|Featuredarticle}}{{FFA/include|z}}
 
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! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#cef2e0;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3bfb1;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Did you know...</h2>
 
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|{{DYK|r}}{{DidYouKnow|a}}{{DYK|n}}{{DidYouKnow|d}}{{DYK|o}}{{DidYouKnow|m}}
 
<div align="right" class="noprint">
 
'''[[Did You Know|Archive]]''' &ndash; '''[[Uncyclopedia:DYK submissions|Suggest new entries]]'''
 
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|width="45%" class="MainPageBG" style="border:1px solid #cedff2; background-color:#f2f8ff; vertical-align:top;"|
 
{| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#f2f8ff;"
 
! <h2 style="margin:0;background-color:#cedff2;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">In the news</h2>
 
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| <div class="nonwhite">{{RecentUnNews}}</div>
 
<div style="text-align: right;" class="noprint">
 
'''[[UnNews:Main Page|UnNews]]''' &ndash; '''[http://www.freewebs.com/uncyclopediacast/ Radio Free Lunch]'''<br>
 
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! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#cedff2;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">On this day...</h2>
 
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| <div class="nonwhite">{{Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}}}</div>
 
<div align="right" class="noprint">
 
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{tomorrow}}|View tomorrow]] &ndash; [[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|More anniversaries...]]'''
 
</div>
 
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! style="background-color:#cedff2; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size:120%; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left" | Colonization of the Week
 
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|<center><span style="font-size:130%;font-weight:bold" class="plainlinks">[[Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization#This week's Colonization|{{Imperial Colonization/current}}]]</span><br />''Help [[Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization|us]] clear the ivy of crap,<br>and plant the seeds of humour.''</center>
 
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[[Image:2001-2.png|centre|thumb|400px|''dun...'']]
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[[Image:2001-3.png|right|thumb|400px|'''''dun...''''']]
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[[Image:2001-4.png|centre|thumb|600px|<big>'''''[[2001: A Space Odyssey|DAH DAHHH!!!]]'''''</big>]]
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{|class="MainPageBG" style="margin: 0; padding: .5em; width:100%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"
 
{|class="MainPageBG" style="margin: 0; padding: .5em; width:100%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"
! <h2 style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Today's featured picture</h2>
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! <h2 style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Today's featured picture [[image:HalLogo.png|20px]]</h2>
 
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|style="color:#000;"|{{FI}}
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{|style="color:#000;"
|}<!--
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|style="vertical-align: top;"|[[Image:{{{image|2001-12.png}}}|top|{{{size|350px}}}]]
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|style="vertical-align: top;"|<p>dun... ''dun...'' '''''dun...''''' ... <big>'''''DAH DAHHH!!!'''''</big></p>
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<small>Image Credit: [[User:{{{credit|HAL 9000}}}|<span style="color:#121212;text-decoration:underline;">{{{credit|HAL 9000}}}</span>]]</small><br>
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<small>[[Template:FI/{{{image|2001-12.png}}}|<span style="color:#121212;text-decoration:underline;">Edit Caption<span>]] - [[Uncyclopedia:PFP/{{{image|2001-12.png}}}|<span style="color:#121212;text-decoration:underline;">Vote on this image</span>]] - [[Uncyclopedia:VFP|Nominate new image]] - [[Uncyclopedia:PFP|View all featured images]]
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------------- Recent Articles ---------------------- -->
 
 
{| width="100%" class="MainPageBG" style="margin-top: .5em; padding: .5em; border:1px solid #ffc9c9; background-color:#fff3f3; vertical-align:top; "
 
{| width="100%" class="MainPageBG" style="margin-top: .5em; padding: .5em; border:1px solid #ffc9c9; background-color:#fff3f3; vertical-align:top; "
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! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#F2CECE;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;"><div class="plainlinks" style="float:right;margin-left:5px;margin-right:10px">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recent|action=edit}} edit]''</div> Open the pod bay doors, Hal </h2>
 
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|'''I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.''' [[image:HalLogo.png|25px]]
'''[[Special:Newpages|More recent articles]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Newpages|What's the problem?]]''' |
'''[[Special:Wantedpages|Most wanted pages]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Wantedpages|I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.]]''' |
'''[[:Category:Rewrite|Requested rewrites]]''' |
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'''[[:Category:Rewrite|What are you talking about, HAL? ]]''' |
'''[[:Category:Stub|Add to stubs]]''' |
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'''[[:Category:Stub|I don't know what you're talking about, HAL. ]]''' |
'''[[Special:Lonelypages|Lonely pages]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Lonelypages|I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen. ]]''' |
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Pee Review|Pee Review]]''' |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Pee Review|Where the hell'd you get that idea, HAL? ]]''' |
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles|Try writing about...]]''' |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles|Dave, although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move. ]]''' |
'''[[:Category:Stuck articles needing a push|Stuck articles needing a push]]''' |
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'''[[:Category:Stuck articles needing a push|Alright, HAL. I'll go in through the emergency airlock. ]]''' |
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Ideas|Great ideas]]'''
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Ideas|Without your space helmet, Dave, you're going to find that rather difficult. ]]'''
 
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! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#F2F2CE;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Writer and Noob of the Month</h2>
 
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[[Image:HalLogo.png|left|70px]]
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I'm sorry, Dave. '''[[User:MacMania|Macmania]]''' does not compute.
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Welcome to Voiceprint Identification. When you see the red light go on, would you please state in the following order: your destination, your nationality, and your full name; surname first, Christian name and initial. And don't ask '''[[User:Why do I need to provide this?|why do you need to provide this.]]'''
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Writer of the Month|Vote for Writer of the Month]]''' | '''[[Uncyclopedia:Noob of the Month|Vote for Noob of the Month]]''' | '''[[Uncyclopedia:Uncyclopedian of the Month|Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month]]''' | '''[[Uncyclopedia:Past Winners/nav|Past Winners]]'''<noinclude>
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{{Vote Reminder}}
 
{{Vote Reminder}}
 
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{{Sisterprojects/languages}}
 
   
Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja]]s.
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Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|DUN DUN DUUUUNNN!!!]], and ultimate computing power.
 
[[Category: Uncyclopedia]]
 
[[Category: Uncyclopedia]]
 
__NOEDITSECTION__
 
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{{FA|date=1 April 2008|revision=2907173|hidden=unlike your mom from a mile away}}
 

Revision as of 22:24, October 14, 2009

HalLogo

HalLogo
Just what do you think you're writing, Dave?


This is HALopedia ,
30,722 million processes per second

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

2001-1

dun...









2001-2

dun...

2001-3

dun...









Today's featured picture HalLogo

2001-12

dun... dun... dun... ... DAH DAHHH!!!

Image Credit: HAL 9000
Edit Caption - Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images


Open the pod bay doors, Hal

I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that. HalLogo

What's the problem? | I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do. | What are you talking about, HAL? | I don't know what you're talking about, HAL. | I know that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen. | Where the hell'd you get that idea, HAL? | Dave, although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move. | Alright, HAL. I'll go in through the emergency airlock. | Without your space helmet, Dave, you're going to find that rather difficult.

Writer and Noob of the Month

HalLogo

I'm sorry, Dave. Macmania does not compute.


HalLogo

Welcome to Voiceprint Identification. When you see the red light go on, would you please state in the following order: your destination, your nationality, and your full name; surname first, Christian name and initial. And don't ask why do you need to provide this.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


Protected by DUN DUN DUUUUNNN!!!, and ultimate computing power.

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