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(reverting; all good things must end)
(happy Talk Like A Pirate Day, mates)
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<div align=center><p style="margin: 2.5em 0 0 3%; text-align: center;
font-size: 125%; line-height: 1.3">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]], the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</p><p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%">[[Sophia]] has inspired us to work on [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles since opening in January 2005.</p><br>
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font-size: 125%; line-height: 1.3">Ahoy, me hearty and welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Pirateopedia]] (formally '''HMS Uncyclopedia'''), the [[content-free|duty-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|pirates can edit]] Arghh!</p><br><p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%">[[Sophia|Davey Jones]] has inspired us to sink and pillage [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] ships since we set sail in January 2005.</p>
Before editing, please read the '''''[[Beginner's Guide]]''''' and browse '''''[[Help:Contents|the Big Five]].'''''<br>
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''Before running out your guns, please read the [[Help:HowTo|ships charter]] and [[Flamewar Guidelines|the pirates code]] or you'll be [[Uncyclopedia:Ban Patrol|Walking the Plank]].<br>If you scurvy dogs still are still a bit confused then [[:Category:Ignorable policies|speak to polly]](sqwark, Pieces of Eight, Pieces of Eight)''
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<p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 105%;">[[:Category:Politics and Government|Politics]] | [[:Category:Games|Games]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|Computers]] | [[:Category:People|People]] | [[:Category:Quaint|Quaint]] | [[:Category:Coherent|Coherent]] <br> '''[[Special:Popularpages|Most Popular]] | [[Special:Allpages|Alphabetical Index]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Other Categories...]]'''</p>
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<h5>Buried Treasure: <p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 105%;">[[:Category:Politics and Government|Bilge Rats]] | [[:Category:Games|Games]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|Marine Technology]] | [[:Category:People|Pirates]] | [[:Category:Quaint|Grog]] | [[:Category:Coherent|Coherent]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Most Succesful Pirates]] | [[Special:Allpages|LLoyds List's]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Other Ships...]]</p> </h5>
   
 
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|width="55%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #ffc9c9; color: #000; background-color: #fff3f3"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"> <h3>Today's Featured Article</h3>
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|width="55%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #ffc9c9; color: #000; background-color: #fff3f3"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"> <h3>Today's Featured Pirate</h3>
 
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{{Featuredarticle}}
   
You can [[Uncyclopedia:VFH|vote]] for your favorite articles to be featured.
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You can [[Uncyclopedia:VFH|vote]] for your favorite Pirate to be avoid the handmans noose.
   
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Best of | More of the best of Uncyclopedia]]'''
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Best of | More of the best Pirates from the good ship Pirateopedia]]'''
 
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Selected anniversaries</h3>
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>What were we getting up too in past years, Arghhhh!</h3>
 
{{Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}}}
 
{{Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}}}
   
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|Archived Anniversaries]]'''
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|Archived doings]]'''
 
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|width="45%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c6c9ff; color: #000; background-color: #f0f0ff"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recentnews|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>In the news</h3>
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|width="45%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c6c9ff; color: #000; background-color: #f0f0ff"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recentnews|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>What be worrying the Land Lubbers</h3>
 
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:UnNews|More Current Events at UnNews News]]'''
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:UnNews|Pirate Times]]'''
 
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Did you know...</h3>
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Arghh, I'll wagger you didn't know that...</h3>
''From Uncyclopedia's [[Special:Listadmins|biggest morons]]:
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''From Uncyclopedia's [[Special:Listadmins|roughest captains]]:
 
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| colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c9c9c9; color: #000; background-color: #f3fff3"| <div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recent|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Recent press ganged crew</h3>
 
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'''[[Special:Newpages|More Recently press-ganged crew]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Wantedpages|Most wanted pirates]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Lonelypages|Lonely pages]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Lonelypages|Marooned with nowt but a pistol and one shot]]''' |
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles|Try writing about...]]'''
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles|Help out the land-lubbers]]
   
 
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| colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c9c9c9; color: #000; background-color: #ffffdf"| <div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><h3>Writer and Noob of the Month</h3>
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| colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c9c9c9; color: #000; background-color: #ffffdf"| <div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><h3>Pirate of the Month</h3>
 
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{{Sisterprojects/languages}}
 
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{{donate|Uncyclopedia}}
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{{donate|Pirateopedia}}
   
For nonsense related chat, see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode].
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For Pirate related chat, see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode].
   
Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja]]s.
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Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Law of the Sea]], and an elite crew of [[Clinja|Ghost Pirates]]s.
 
[[Category: Uncyclopedia]]
 
[[Category: Uncyclopedia]]

Revision as of 06:26, September 19, 2005

Ahoy, me hearty and welcome to Pirateopedia (formally HMS Uncyclopedia), the duty-free encyclopedia that pirates can edit Arghh!


Davey Jones has inspired us to sink and pillage 30,554 ships since we set sail in January 2005.

Before running out your guns, please read the ships charter and the pirates code or you'll be Walking the Plank.
If you scurvy dogs still are still a bit confused then speak to polly(sqwark, Pieces of Eight, Pieces of Eight)

Buried Treasure:

Bilge Rats | Games | Marine Technology | Pirates | Grog | Coherent
Most Succesful Pirates | LLoyds List's | Other Ships...


Errors
Windows XP is renowned for its stability and reliability.
Vote for featured image

Today's Featured Pirate

Today's Featured Article - Accountant

Ties

An accountant is a professional who sits in an office all day doing a few sums. Most college students aspire to be accountants, as playing on a computer is cool, though it would be cooler if they paid you to use World of Warcraft instead of Excel. College students with physical gifts do not aspire to be accountants, and may wind up hiring a couple. If being boring were an Olympic sport, accountants would always take home the gold.

Webster tells us that an accountant "understands the cost of everything and the value of nothing." It is not clear why we should give such credence to Webster, apart from the fact that he has eight accountants working for him: Webster has to go stronger to the hoop and learn to box out his man. At any rate, it is not true that accountants understand the value of nothing. For example, they intimately understand the value of having the total at the bottom of the left-hand column equal the total at the bottom of the right-hand column, just as line employees at McDonald's understand the value of putting the hamburger in the Styrofoam box before handing it to the customer. To mix metaphors, it is their bread and butter. (more...)

Yesterday's Featured Article - Making up Oscar Wilde quotes

Chaiselongue

Hello! My name is Lord Waltherington Spatula. You might have heard of me from either the news coverage of the tragic tram accident that lost me my arms, or the crown court trial where I was declared mentally incompetent after crashing a tram.

I see you're interested in Making up Oscar Wilde Quotes. I was like you once, so very long ago. If you wish to learn as I did then there is only one way. Step forward, my lovely assistant, Oscar.

I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best

He's such a card. Yes that's right, it turns out rumours of Oscar's death were greatly overstated as he's here, with me, in this booth, behind these curtains where you couldn't possibly see him. So, Oscar, why don't you tell everyone what they will need to get started?

Be warned in time, James, and remain, as I do, incomprehensible: to be great is to be misunderstood (more...)

You can vote for your favorite Pirate to be avoid the handmans noose.

More of the best Pirates from the good ship Pirateopedia


What were we getting up too in past years, Arghhhh!

Missstalin

April 16: Stationary Banana Slug Riding Day

  • 1560 BC - Moses forgets to take his schizophrenia pills and begins to hear voices. He takes off from Ur, resulting in all of modern humanity's problems.
  • 1178 BC - Odysseus, legendary King of Ithaca, returns to his kingdom after the Trojan War. Cornellians giggle uncontrollably.
  • 1855 - Abraham and Mary Todd Lincoln enjoy a night of mad passionate love; sloppy seconds are had after Mr. Lincoln keeps his promise that the South Shall Rise Again!
  • 1867 - Queen Victoria considers ending her mourning phase, but continues on: "Why spoil a good time?"
  • 1878 - Joseph Stalin is born.
  • 1889 - Future German dictator, Charles Spencer Chaplin, is born.
  • 1927 - A good day to be born if you are the leader of a world religion with the maddest gaze in human history.
  • 1934 - Eleanor Roosevelt uncharacteristically enjoys a hotdog.
  • 1943 - The first "Annual Miss Stalin-Look-Alike" contest is held in the Soviet Union. Joseph Stalin wins unanimously.
  • 1953 - Desi Arnaz slaps Lucille Ball, calling her an 'estupit beach' on national television.
  • 1972 - At the age of 69, actress Sharon Stone gets a star on the Walk of Fame.
  • 1991 - US federal law passed forbidding driving while spreading cream cheese on a bagel.
  • 2006 - The Queen of England decrees that all Australians must wear cork underpants.
  • 2007 - Donald Trump pardons the 2007 "Annual Miss Stalin-Look-Alike" contest winner for her objectable behavior.

Archived doings

What be worrying the Land Lubbers





Pirate Times


Arghh, I'll wagger you didn't know that...

From Uncyclopedia's roughest captains:

  • ...that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand?


Read More

Pirate of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
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Another way to waste time
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Instructions and guides for anything and everything
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Content-free books
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If it makes sense, we don't want it
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Debating all the irrelevant issues
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Don't make me explain it to you twice
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Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 30,554 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
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W17x11 30649
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16220
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W17x11 20323
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W17x11 12328
Wiki it
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W17x11 7257
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W17x11 8775
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5328
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6804
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on August 12, 2011.
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