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font-size: 125%; line-height: 1.3">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]], the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</p><br><p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%">[[Sophia]] has inspired us to work on [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles since opening in January 2005.</p>
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font-size: 125%; line-height: 1.3">WB2 [[Uncyclopedia:About|uNcYcLoPeDiA]]!!! ;p the internt [[Blog|bl0g]] ''U'' can edit!!!!<br>LOL!!!!!</p><br><p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%; background-color:#00ff00;"><font-color=#ffffff>We've posted </font><font-color=#66ffff>[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]]</font><font color=#ffffff> entries since starting in January 2005!!!</font><br>
'''''Before editing, please read the [[Beginner's Guide]].'''<br>You may also wish to read the [[Help:HowTo|writing guidelines]], [[Uncyclopedia:Flamewar Guidelines|flamewar manual]], and other [[Uncyclopedia:How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid|writing tips]] as well.<br>More Detail can be found in our [[:Category:Ignorable policies|Ignorable policies]]''
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<font color=#ffffff>''Before blogging, plz read our <font color="#66ffff">[[Help:HowTo|philsophy]]</font> and [[Flamewar Guidelines|forum rulez!]].<br>Here are [[:Category:Ignorable policies|MORE of our favorite blogs!!]]''</font></p>
   
<h5>Browse: <p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 105%;">[[:Category:Politics and Government|Politics]] | [[:Category:Games|Games]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|Computers]] | [[:Category:People|People]] | [[:Category:Quaint|Quaint]] | [[:Category:Coherent|Coherent]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Most Popular]] | [[Special:Allpages|Alphabetical Index]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Other Categories...]]</p> </h5>
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<h5>Look!: <p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 105%;">[[:Category:Politics and Government|Anarchy teh best]] | [[:Category:Games|k00l games]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|cOmPuTeRs!]] | [[:Category:People|People I hate]] | [[:Category:Quaint|gh3y]] | [[:Category:Coherent|read this!!!]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Our BEST posts1!]] | [[Special:Allpages|All teh pages]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Stuff]]</p> </h5>
   
 
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|width="30%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c6c9ff; color: #000; background-color: #993399"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recentnews|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3><font color=#ff0000>My blogrings</font></h3>
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|width="50%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #ffc9c9; color: #000; background-color: #ffffff"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"> <h3>Wednesday August 31 2005</h3>
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{{Featuredarticle}}
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You can [[Uncyclopedia:VFH|give ePropz]] for your fave entries!
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Best of | comment on this post!! plz!!!]]'''
 
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Did you know...</h3>
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''From Uncyclopedia's [[Special:Listadmins|biggest morons]]:
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>JSYK!!!</h3>
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''[[Special:Listadmins|domizianogalia & T1m2 !]] just totally posted this stuff!:
 
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'''[[Did You Know|Read More]]'''
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'''[[Did You Know|More more more]]'''
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Calender, don't forget my B-DAY</h3>
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{{Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}}}
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|Even more kool stuff!!!!!!!!]]'''
 
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| colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c9c9c9; color: #000; background-color: #ffffdf"| <div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><h3>Writer of the Month</h3>
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For nonsense related chat, see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode].
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To chat to me , see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode].
   
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Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja|bloggers]]s.
 
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almost forgot

Revision as of 15:04, August 31, 2005

WB2 uNcYcLoPeDiA!!! ;p the internt bl0g U can edit!!!!
LOL!!!!!


We've posted 30,725 entries since starting in January 2005!!!
Before blogging, plz read our philsophy and forum rulez!.
Here are MORE of our favorite blogs!!

Look!:

Anarchy teh best | k00l games | cOmPuTeRs! | People I hate | gh3y | read this!!!
Our BEST posts1! | All teh pages | Stuff


Errors

Windows XP is renowned for its stability and reliability.
Vote for featured image

Wednesday August 31 2005

Today's Featured Article - Battle of Bosworth

Bosworth02

The Battle of Bosworth (22nd August 1485) is classified as the last ruckus in the War of the Roses. It saw King Richard III slain on the battlefield and his successor Henry VII proclaimed king by a patriotic army of mercenaries, Welshmen, Frenchmen, felons, traitors and turncoats. The battle was so famous that years later no one could remember exactly what happened, where it had been fought or whether it had been a good idea after all.

England in the 15th century had gone through a long struggle between rival groups of aristocrats who had nothing better to do but to argue about the colour of roses. Some said the red rose (of England) was more noble but others said white was purer. After some polite discussions, leading on to debates and finally fights - the issue had appeared to have been resolved when King Edward IV killed his rivals in 1471. The Whites or the 'Yorkists' won whilst the Reds (the Lancastrians) were broken and left only an itinerant Welshman called Henry 'Dai' Tudor as their standard bearer. Since there was a price on his head, Henry moved to a caravan park in Brittany where he lived with his uncle Sir Jasper Tudor ('Do Not Touch Me'). Jasper was also Welsh and a creep.

That should have been that for the Lancastrians but in 1483 Edward IV died whilst trying to row off his excess body fat in a fishing expedition. His son Edward became King Edward V but needed to have his fancy dress day out (a coronation) to be 'King in the eyes of God'. But Edward was still in short tights so a regent was required or 'protector' as the title was then called. (more...)

Yesterday's Featured Article - Nouvelle cuisine

Ncdiner

Nouvelle cuisine is the ideal answer when a restaurant becomes too popular. In these cases, the chef is worked off his or her feet trying to keep all those tables supplied with appetising, nutritious food. Increasing the prices may offer a temporary relief from the overpopularity of the eating-place, or it may instead create an atmosphere of quality and exclusiveness, thereby increasing customers further still. Switching from food to Nouvelle Cuisine helpfully reduces the number of customers to manageable proportions, without resorting to such unpopular or illegal measures as salmonella or e-coli.

No one single characteristic describes Nouvelle Cuisine. Rather, a combination of known attributes, when seen together, determine the style to exist.

  • Oversize plate: Nouvelle Cuisine dishes are invariably served on a plate at least three times the diameter required to hold the meal itself. Sometimes, the plate is so large that places must be double-spaced. The very large size of plate allows adequate free space, unencumbered with food, for the chef to demonstrate his or her artistic talent. It is also important that the plate is cold, preferably having been deep-frozen until a few minutes before serving. This coldness ensures that the customer has to eat-up quickly, thus freeing the table sooner.
  • Dusty eating surfaces: The plate, and any other surfaces carrying food shall be sufficiently dusty to create the impression of a possible hygiene concern. If plates do not remain unused long enough for natural dust to build up, then this may be substituted with flour, or in fact with any powdery material typically found in a kitchen. (more...)

You can give ePropz for your fave entries!

comment on this post!! plz!!!


JSYK!!!

domizianogalia & T1m2 ! just totally posted this stuff!:

  • ...that bipolar bears are not to be messed with, more-so than polar bears?


More more more


Calender, don't forget my B-DAY

Dangerous shark

October 25: Shark Awareness Day

  • 625 - Pope Boniface V eaten by a blue shark.
  • 1147 - The Portuguese, under Afonso I, and Crusaders from England conquer Lisbon after a four-month siege. They decide to celebrate by going for a swim, and then all get eaten by tiger sharks.
  • 1655 - Shark arrives from the future, is promptly killed by puzzled Welshman.
  • 1936 - The Rome-Berlin Axis is created by Adolf Hitler, Benito Mussolini, and a bunch of great white sharks (the sharks wanted to ally with Hitler, because they were great white supremacists).
  • 1946 - The secret vote was held by the British parliament to enact the 1946 Gay and Lesbian Slavery Act
  • 1977 - Renegade child eats dozens of sharks at Miami Beach. Panicked King Tritan declares State of Emergency and suspends Civil Liberties.
  • 1979 - Green Peace activist dies after trying to train the first vegetarian shark.
  • 1988 - The Gardners are cloned
  • 1993 - Vincent Price dies.
  • 1994 - Vincent Price's tomb found empty and a series of bizarre murders occur. Sharks are prime suspects.
  • 1997 - Charge of the White Van Men an infamous fight during the Battle of Balaclava
  • 2006 - All travel to Australia banned; shark eats young child at beach.
  • 2007 - Jim Toomey, writer of the comic strip Sherman's Lagoon, is given honorary Cambodian citizenship.
  • 2008 - (Morning) I could not find my keys. Sharks were to blame.
  • 2008 - (Afternoon) It was discovered that I forgot they were on the table. Sharks were to blame.
  • 2008 - (Evening) The goddamn car wouldn't start. An alliance of sharks and malicious little green men is to blame.

Even more kool stuff!!!!!!!!

Writer of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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