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font-size: 125%; line-height: 1.3">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]], the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</p><br><p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%">[[Sophia]] has inspired us to work on [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles since opening in January 2005.</p>
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font-size: 125%; line-height: 1.3">WB2 [[Uncyclopedia:About|uNcYcLoPeDiA]]!!! ;p the internt [[Blog|bl0g]] ''U'' can edit!!!!<br>LOL!!!!!</p><br><p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%; background-color:#00ff00;"><font-color=#ffffff>We've posted </font><font-color=#66ffff>[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]]</font><font color=#ffffff> entries since starting in January 2005!!!</font><br>
'''''Before editing, please read the [[Beginner's Guide]].'''<br>You may also wish to read the [[Help:HowTo|writing guidelines]], [[Uncyclopedia:Flamewar Guidelines|flamewar manual]], and other [[Uncyclopedia:How To Be Funny And Not Just Stupid|writing tips]] as well.<br>More Detail can be found in our [[:Category:Ignorable policies|Ignorable policies]]''
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<font color=#ffffff>''Before blogging, plz read our <font color="#66ffff">[[Help:HowTo|philsophy]]</font> and [[Flamewar Guidelines|forum rulez!]].<br>Here are [[:Category:Ignorable policies|MORE of our favorite blogs!!]]''</font></p>
   
<h5>Browse: <p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 105%;">[[:Category:Politics and Government|Politics]] | [[:Category:Games|Games]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|Computers]] | [[:Category:People|People]] | [[:Category:Quaint|Quaint]] | [[:Category:Coherent|Coherent]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Most Popular]] | [[Special:Allpages|Alphabetical Index]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Other Categories...]]</p> </h5>
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<h5>Look!: <p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 105%;">[[:Category:Politics and Government|Anarchy teh best]] | [[:Category:Games|k00l games]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|cOmPuTeRs!]] | [[:Category:People|People I hate]] | [[:Category:Quaint|gh3y]] | [[:Category:Coherent|read this!!!]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Our BEST posts1!]] | [[Special:Allpages|All teh pages]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Stuff]]</p> </h5>
   
 
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You can [[Uncyclopedia:VFH|vote]] for your favorite articles to be featured.
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|width="30%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c6c9ff; color: #000; background-color: #993399"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recentnews|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3><font color=#ff0000>My blogrings</font></h3>
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Best of | More of the best of Uncyclopedia]]'''
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:UnNews|News from FOXNEWS!]]'''
 
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Selected anniversaries</h3>
 
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:UnNews|More Current Events at UnNews News]]'''
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|width="50%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #ffc9c9; color: #000; background-color: #ffffff"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"> <h3>Wednesday August 31 2005</h3>
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{{Featuredarticle}}
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You can [[Uncyclopedia:VFH|give ePropz]] for your fave entries!
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Best of | comment on this post!! plz!!!]]'''
 
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Did you know...</h3>
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''From Uncyclopedia's [[Special:Listadmins|biggest morons]]:
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>JSYK!!!</h3>
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''[[Special:Listadmins|domizianogalia & T1m2 !]] just totally posted this stuff!:
 
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'''[[Did You Know|Read More]]'''
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'''[[Did You Know|More more more]]'''
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Calender, don't forget my B-DAY</h3>
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{{Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}}}
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|Even more kool stuff!!!!!!!!]]'''
 
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| colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c9c9c9; color: #000; background-color: #ffffdf"| <div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><h3>Writer of the Month</h3>
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For nonsense related chat, see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode].
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To chat to me , see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode].
   
Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja]]s.
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Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja|bloggers]]s.
 
[[Category: Uncyclopedia]]
 
[[Category: Uncyclopedia]]
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almost forgot

Revision as of 15:04, August 31, 2005

WB2 uNcYcLoPeDiA!!! ;p the internt bl0g U can edit!!!!
LOL!!!!!


We've posted 30,836 entries since starting in January 2005!!!
Before blogging, plz read our philsophy and forum rulez!.
Here are MORE of our favorite blogs!!

Look!:

Anarchy teh best | k00l games | cOmPuTeRs! | People I hate | gh3y | read this!!!
Our BEST posts1! | All teh pages | Stuff


Connect-the-dots

A state planning committee map of Connecticut.
Vote for featured image

Wednesday August 31 2005

Today's Featured Article - Constitution of the United States (actual text)

Sigs

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Section I. Any male constituent who has attained the Age of Twenty-One years shall vote for a nobleman of his choosing to represent him in the executive legislature. He shall freely cast his choice on a ballot in a designated voting bureau and deposit the ballot in a box. After all the constituents accomplished their duty of Citizenry, the box contents shall be dumped in the nearest river and the predetermined winner be announced to the People.

Section II. Any elected representative in the Land of the Free shall receive 10 slaves Free of charge, only shipping and handling to pay and shall be refunded if not satisfied before 30 days.(more...)

Yesterday's Featured Article - Power

Creation of the Sun and Moon face detail

Power . A word that is doubtless familiar to you and a concept you probably think you understand but yet, how much do we you really know about power?

Not much!

That's correct, bodiless, unexplained, yet helpful italicised text! We know next to nothing about power which, in its majesty is in all things, if you can comprehend such a concept. It could even be within you! You could have power right now and be unaware of the staggering implications of that fact.

I could have power?

Quite possibly, I can usually tell very quickly whether or not somebody has power. I have power and as a result I feel a certain kinship towards others with power.

I'd love to hear more about power!

Of course you would! (more...)

You can give ePropz for your fave entries!

comment on this post!! plz!!!


JSYK!!!

domizianogalia & T1m2 ! just totally posted this stuff!:

  • ...that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?


More more more


Calender, don't forget my B-DAY

Ctfo

Delicious!

January 31: National Ice Cream Day

  • 201 AD - Ice cream is invented in Rome, but it quickly melts due to the lack of refrigerators. Everyone is forced to slurp it.
  • 1551 - French explorers with sensitive teeth die exploring Northern Africa after keeling over in pain from eating ice cream, leaving themselves open to attack by savage tribesmen who quickly beheaded them.
  • 1819 - Heinrich Maanschweisener creates a means to produce dots from ice cream; he is defenestrated later that year on the orders of Baron Rottweil von Friendly, who fears for his monopoly on frozen treats.
  • 1928 - Stalin re-invents ice cream and names it Stalin Cream. USSR rejoices but the American scum looses there underwear.
  • 1949 - Friendly's loses contract to sell ice cream in China and is denied renewed funding by the U.S. government.
  • 1960 - Vespugian president Manuel del Caracos, on a tour of America, drowns when he falls into a flash-freezer at the Pittsburgh Dippin' Dots factory.
  • 1979 - Ben and Jerry's "Popped Cherry" ice cream is a hit.
  • 1971 - The first ice cream stand is opened in Moscow, Russia, but quickly seized by the government.
  • 1989 - Alexei Kalashnikov, proprietor of a meager Baskin Robins parlor in Stalingrad, defects to the West and takes the secret recipe for Dippin' Dots with him.
  • 1991 - Dunkin' Donuts loses a hedge-trimming contest to Dairy Queen.
  • 2007 - Coaticook brand ice cream hits shelves in Quebec, next to other ice creams.
  • 2008 - Coaticook goes ahead with first ever ice cream referendum, demanding that they have their own shelf.
  • 2009 - After a cat infestation, Ben & Jerry's introduces "Cat Pan Crunch" flavor
  • 2085 - Dippin' Dots production headquarters are obliterated by an Iranian superweapon; Friendly's rejoices.
  • 999999999999 AD - <insert name here> creates unfunny joke about pokemon, nazis and hitler.

Even more kool stuff!!!!!!!!

Writer of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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