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<div align=center><p style="margin: 2.5em 0 0 3%; text-align: center; |
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font-size: 125%; line-height: 1.3">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia]], the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Help:HowTo|anyone can edit]].</p><br><p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%">[[Sophia]] has inspired us to work on [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles since opening in January 2005.</p> |
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''Before editing, please read the [[Help:HowTo|writing guidelines]] and [[Flamewar Guidelines|flamewar manual]].<br>'' |
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<p style="margin: 2.5em 0 0 3%; text-align: center; font-size: 95%; line-height: 1.3"> |
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'''Welcome to the Swiss [[Uncyclopedia]]''', the [[neutral]] encyclopedia that [[Help:HowTo|anyone can edit]] but only if they have sufficient funds. |
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<p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%">[[Sophia]] has opened [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] numbered bank accounts since opening in January 2005.<br> |
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''Before editing, please read the [[Help:HowTo|War Profit Investment guidelines]] and [[Flamewar Guidelines|neutrality manual]].''</p> |
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<p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 80%;">[[:Category:Sex|Sex]] | [[:Category:Games|War]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|Bank Vault Technology]] | [[:Category:People|Reservists]] | [[:Category:Quaint|Female Emancipation]] | [[:Category:Coherent|4 Offical Languages]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Most Wealthy]] | [[Special:Allpages|Numerical Index]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Not Money, Choclate or Cucckoo Clocks...]]</p> |
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<td style="background-color:red; width:10em "> </td> |
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</td><td>[[Image:Swiss army knife open 20050612.jpg|thumb|280px|Respect my Neutralitah!]]</td></tr> |
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<td>[[Image:Latte Art Nike.jpg|thumb|280px|I'm Rich Bitch!]]</td></tr> |
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<h5>Browse: <p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 105%;">[[:Category:Politics and Government|Politics]] | [[:Category:Games|Games]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|Computers]] | [[:Category:People|People]] | [[:Category:Quaint|Quaint]] | [[:Category:Coherent|Coherent]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Most Popular]] | [[Special:Allpages|Alphabetical Index]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Other Categories...]]</p> </h5> |
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* Bienvenue à [[fr:|l'Uncyclopédia suisse]], l'encyclopédie tout-à-fait neutre et fait complètement de fromage que n'importe qui peut redacter s'ils ont des fonds suffisants. [[Sophia]] a établi [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] comptes bancaires numérotés en suisse depuis l'ouverture en janvier 2005. Avant l'édition, lisez SVP les [[Help:HowTo|directives d'investissement, de bénéfice de guerre]] et le [[Flamewar Guidelines|manuel de neutralité]]! |
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* Willkommen an [[de:|Uncyclopedia Schweizer]], sorgt die neutrale Enzyklopädie dafür gänzlich von Käse, daß jeder veröffentlichen kann, wenn sie ausreichende Fonds haben. [[Sophia]] hat [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] Bankkonten eröffnet, die seit der Öffnung im Januar 2005 numeriert wurden. Vor der Ausgabe lesen die Richtlinien der [[Help:HowTo|Investition von Kriegsgewinn]] und das [[Flamewar Guidelines|Neutralitätshandbuch]]! |
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* Benvenuto al [[it:|Uncyclopedia svizzero]], l'enciclopedia neutra che chiunque può pubblicare ma soltanto se hanno fondi monetari suffient. [[Sophia]] ha aperto [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] clienti numerati della banca dall'apertura nel mese di gennaio del 2005. Prima della pubblicazione, legga prego la guida di riferimento di [[Help:HowTo|investimento di profitto di guerra]] ed il [[Flamewar Guidelines|manuale di neutralità]]. |
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|width="55%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #ffc9c9; color: #000; background-color: #fff3f3"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"> <h3>Today's Featured Account</h3> |
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You can [[Uncyclopedia:VFH|vote]] for your favorite articles to be featured. |
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You can [[Uncyclopedia:VFH|vote]] (even Women!) for your favorite articles to be featured. |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Best of | More of the best of Uncyclopedia]]''' |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|Archived Anniversaries]]''' |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|Archived Anniversaries]]''' |
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|width="45%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c6c9ff; color: #000; background-color: #f0f0ff"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recentnews|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>In the news</h3> |
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|width="45%" class="MainPageBG" style="border: 1px solid #c6c9ff; color: #000; background-color: #f0f0ff"|<div style="padding: .4em .9em .9em"><div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recentnews|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Things happening in the rest of the world, which didn't make us a profit.</h3> |
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'''[[Current events|More Current Events]]''' |
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'''[[Current events|More Things to Avoid Getting Involved With]]''' |
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Did you know...</h3> |
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<div style="float:right;margin-left:5px;">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:DidYouKnow|action=edit}} edit]''</div> <h3>Obviously you didn't know...</h3> |
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''From Uncyclopedia's [[Special:Listadmins|biggest morons]]: |
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''From Uncyclopedia's [[Special:Listadmins|Heads of States]]: |
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'''[[Did You Know|Read More]]''' |
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'''[[Did You Know|If you care about the rest of the world...]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Newpages|More recent articles]]''' <!-- | |
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'''[[Special:Newpages|More News which does not Concern Us]]''' |
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'''[[Special:Wantedpages|Most wanted bankers]]''' | |
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'''[[:Category:Rewrite|Fix Accounting Mistakes]]''' | |
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'''[[:Category:Stub|Make a Deposit]]''' | |
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'''[[Special:Lonelypages|Lost Nazi Gold]]'''| |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles|Educate the World...]]''' |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:List of Uncyclopedias|Complete list of Uncyclopedias]]''' · |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:Multilingual coordination|Multilingual coordination]]''' · |
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'''[[Uncyclopedia:How to start a new Uncyclopedia|Start an Uncyclopedia in another language]]''' |
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For nonsense related chat, see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode]. |
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Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja]]s. |
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For neutrality related chat, see [irc://irc.us.freenode.net/uncyclopedia #uncyclopedia @ FreeNode]. |
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[[Category: Uncyclopedia]] |
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Protected by a [[Help:Fair Use|Half Million Man Army]], and their [[Special:listadmins|knives]]. |