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<h1 style="font-size:162%;border:none;margin: 0;padding:.1em;color:#000">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]],</h1>
 
<h1 style="font-size:162%;border:none;margin: 0;padding:.1em;color:#000">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]],</h1>
<div style="top:+0.2em;font-size: 95%">the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</div>
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<div style="top:+0.2em;font-size: 95%">the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]], unless the server goes down, in which case no-one can edit.</div>
 
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%;text-align:center;font-size:85%;">[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles in English</div>
 
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%;text-align:center;font-size:85%;">[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles in English</div>
 
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Revision as of 05:41, September 21, 2007

Welcome to Uncyclopedia,

the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit, unless the server goes down, in which case no-one can edit.
31,167 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Today's Featured Article - Box-spring

Lost in bed

A box-spring (or divan in the UK, where they don't use such common vulgarities as box) is a type of bed base. These are generally designed to give the general approximation of comfort while in the store testing the bed, but are designed to cause discomfort from the moment of installation within a home.

The construction of these nominally entitled beds typically consist of a wooden frame, covered in dust mite friendly cloth, and containing what are referred to as bedsprings. These bedsprings are tested against several criterion, known colloquially as the "four c's". These are: (more...)

  • Clarity
  • Carat
  • Color (or colour in the UK, where extraneous vowels are the preferred norm).
  • Cut
  • Certificate

Most wire coils contain some inner flaws (or inclusions in the UK), that occur in the manufacturing process. Highly skilled manufacturers work on adding these in an extremely calculated manner. The purpose of these is to allow the bed to have an initial softness or "comfort" factor, but due to these inclusions the springs will quickly weaken, deform, snap, or generally just become completely screwed up. Hairline fractures hat occur laterally along the direction of the spring are highly sought (or "saught" in the UK), along with air bubbles in the spring itself.(more...)

Recently featured: Warranty

Yesterday's Featured Article -

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Snips, snails and puppy dog tails, featured on 28 August 2012. See the featured version.
Bureau of time management, featured on 28 August 2011. See the featured version.
Beige, featured on 28 August 2010. See the featured version.

Did you know...

*...that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles?
  • ...that the sport of Water Polo can be greatly improved with the addition of sharks?
  • ...that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles?
  • ...that the sport of Water Polo can be greatly improved with the addition of sharks?
  • ...that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles?
  • ...that the sport of Water Polo can be greatly improved with the addition of sharks?
  • ...that, because of Anonymous' credibility, he has become a frequent source of information for news articles?

In the news

On this day...

Mask oggle

August 28: International Horniness Day.

Featured picture

DogLabels

By popular demand, the National Pet Association has released a new guide for the best household chemicals to use for exploding your dog. Caveat Canem, indeed.

Image Credit: MoneySign
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Articles

Coca-Cola Classic | Sex change | FEMA | Bristol International Balloon Fiesta‎‎ | Ponytail | Atonality | Hercules | The Angry Video Game Nerd | Timur the Lame | Wasp | Gebhard Leberecht von Blücher | Colloquialism | Suit | Boeing 737 | Teleology | Sergei Eisenstein | Interstellar (movie) | Bee | Comcast | Green Party (UK) | Lily Savage | Microsoft PowerPoint | Warranty | Unicode | Hillsdale College | Frank Miller | United Kingdom general election, 2015 | Sault Ste. Marie | Metadata


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

You now only have 3, goddamnit 3 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
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The content-free encyclopedia
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The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
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Where noisy things can live and prosper
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Another way to waste time
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Instructions and guides for anything and everything
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Debating all the irrelevant issues
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Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,167 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
45286
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
18180
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
W17x11 16666
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
1dÉ
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
W17x11 8364
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
W17x11 10392
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5720
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
W17x11 Unknown
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7614
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.

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