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<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em 2em; color:#000;">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Modusoperandipedia]],</div>
<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em 2em; color:#000;">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]],</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">[[User:Modusoperandi|Celebrating 40 featured articles in Canadian]] <small>...and counting</small></div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles in English</div>

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Welcome to Uncyclopedia,
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Today's Featured Article - British ski jumpers

Eddie edwards3

The imperialist ambitions of the United Kingdom used to be expressed through colonisation of half of the known world and a complete exploitation of everything it had and it did not have to offer. Nowadays, this behaviour being virtually impossible due to the pressure from the part of the UN and NATO, the British decided to conquer the world of sports. Unfortunately, their plans are usually ruined by different countries, depending on what discipline Britain tries to compete in. In cricket the country is beaten by South Africa, in soccer by Italy and in ice hockey by most of the known countries, whether Northern or Southern. Such losses on multiple fronts have urged England to create several entirely new sports disciplines, which only the British would know how to compete at, notably "unsuccessful ski jumping". Unsuccessful ski jumping is roughly the same as the usual ski jumping with the only difference being the fact that British ski jumpers have, since the dawn of sports, been trained to fail. (more...)

Recently featured: British ski jumpers

Yesterday's Featured Article -

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Muslim Sisterhood, featured on 27 November 2014. See the featured version.
Donald Trump, featured on 27 November 2012. See the featured version.
File talk:Gtavc tkuloi, featured on 27 November 2012. See the featured version.
UnNews:Justin Bieber eats a sandwich, featured on 27 November 2011. See the featured version.
Egyptian Gods, featured on 27 November 2010. See the featured version.

Did you know...

*...that dihydrogen monoxide is a substance found in car exhaust, pesticides, acid rain, and YOUR ENERGY DRINK!?!?!?
  • ...that colorless green ideas sleep furiously?
  • ...that Alaska is a mooseocracy, in which citizens select a moose to lead them?
    • ...that bears have been known to challenge for the role of Alaska's leader?
  • ...that packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" on them are actually delicious?
  • ...that the light at the end of the tunnel is commonly reported to be a strobe light accented with techno?
  • ...that my dad reproduces asexually, thus making me impervious to yo momma jokes?

In the news

On this day...

Alan Beanie Baby

November 27: Alan Bean celebration day (the 4th man on the moon)

  • 1000000 BC - Food invented.
  • 999999 BC - The first feast to celebrate food is held.
  • 999999 BC - First indigestion victim recorded. More soon to follow.
  • 999999 BC- Oscar Wilde invents fat people
  • 999998 BC - First recorded case of Anorexia.
  • 999998 BC - The second feast to celebrate food is held.
  • 999997 BC - The third feast ends in tragedy due to a lack of food. It is decided that all other feasts will be with babies
  • 999996 BC - Babies are eaten for the fourth feast
  • 999980 BC - Thus ends the civilization of the baby eaters
  • 1009 BC - First recorded case of anime-character-fangirlism.
  • 1095 - Pope Urban II launches the First Crusade, thus starting the Indiana Jones film franchise.
  • 1895 - Alfred Nobel fails to win the Nobel Prize, in spite of the fact that it's named after him. The following year however, he does go on to win the lesser-known Alfred Prize.
  • 2012 - The civilization of the baby eaters rises from the dead and eats all babies.
  • 2012 - Babies go extinct.
  • 2015 - Mutant babies are spawned and go on a revenge killing spree, millions dead in days for "Making up for Lost Time"
Colonization of the Week
For the glory of her majesty
Help us clear the ivy of crap,
and plant the seeds of humour.

Today's featured picture

Mavis Beacon

A powerful tool for stereotype reassignment.

Image Credit: Rcmurphy
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

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More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push | Great ideas

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.

Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!

It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

You now only have 3, goddamnit 3 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!

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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,229 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
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Potatohead aqua Featured Article  (read another featured article) Featured version: 1 April 2008
This article has been featured on the main page. — You can vote for or nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.
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