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(This is an extra special holiday. I'm sure you all know what I'm talking about. And I'm also sure that nobody feels like reverting this and/or banning me.)
(Time for a revert methinks)
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<center>Also, '''<big><big><big>VOTE</big></big></big>''' for the '''[[Uncyclopedia:Top10 07|Top 10 Articles of 2007!]]'''</center>
 
<center>Also, '''<big><big><big>VOTE</big></big></big>''' for the '''[[Uncyclopedia:Top10 07|Top 10 Articles of 2007!]]'''</center>
{{:User:Zombiebaron/Zombiebaron Day}}
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Revision as of 16:06, January 16, 2008

Poo Lit Surprise Logo The 10th edition of the Poo Lit Surprise writing competition is now open for submissions. Poo Lit Surprise Logo
Somebody touch me.
Also, VOTE for the Top 10 Articles of 2007!

Welcome to Uncyclopedia,

the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit
31,169 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Today's Featured Article - Box-spring

Lost in bed

A box-spring (or divan in the UK, where they don't use such common vulgarities as box) is a type of bed base. These are generally designed to give the general approximation of comfort while in the store testing the bed, but are designed to cause discomfort from the moment of installation within a home.

The construction of these nominally entitled beds typically consist of a wooden frame, covered in dust mite friendly cloth, and containing what are referred to as bedsprings. These bedsprings are tested against several criterion, known colloquially as the "four c's". These are: (more...)

  • Clarity
  • Carat
  • Color (or colour in the UK, where extraneous vowels are the preferred norm).
  • Cut
  • Certificate

Most wire coils contain some inner flaws (or inclusions in the UK), that occur in the manufacturing process. Highly skilled manufacturers work on adding these in an extremely calculated manner. The purpose of these is to allow the bed to have an initial softness or "comfort" factor, but due to these inclusions the springs will quickly weaken, deform, snap, or generally just become completely screwed up. Hairline fractures hat occur laterally along the direction of the spring are highly sought (or "saught" in the UK), along with air bubbles in the spring itself.(more...)

Recently featured: Box-spring

Yesterday's Featured Article -

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Irish Potato Famine, featured on 30 August 2014. See the featured version.
Minecraft, featured on 30 August 2012. See the featured version.
Ozone, featured on 30 August 2011. See the featured version.
Good Old Days, featured on 30 August 2010. See the featured version.

Did you know...

*...taht wrods and snetnces are raedalbe eevn wehn tehy are toatlly fckued up?
  • ...that if we used a language without homonyms, a certain type of pun would be impossible, and thereby much gaiety would be lost?
  • ...taht wrods and snetnces are raedalbe eevn wehn tehy are toatlly fckued up?
  • ...that if we used a language without homonyms, a certain type of pun would be impossible, and thereby much gaiety would be lost?
  • ...taht wrods and snetnces are raedalbe eevn wehn tehy are toatlly fckued up?
  • ...that if we used a language without homonyms, a certain type of pun would be impossible, and thereby much gaiety would be lost?
  • ...taht wrods and snetnces are raedalbe eevn wehn tehy are toatlly fckued up?

In the news

On this day...

Dyslexic satan worshippers

August 30: Intentional Dyslexic Devil Worshipper day

  • 0 - devil worship is invented by emo lord Hebert.
  • 986 - A devil worshipper gets tricked into selling his soul to god.
  • 1585 - Devil worshippers are saved from being burned in the stake after the inquisitor concludes they were only cursing "dog"
  • 1992 - Devil worshippers are confused and name their religion the Church of Santa Ana.
  • 1994 - Eugene Victor Tombs begins his search for the horizon.
  • 1997 - Devil worshippers go to an apartment in New York for their pilgrimage to Stan.
  • 9199 - De vil foll woers f era KY2 com ptuer suh t down t o be teh end of a ll mnaknid. T om Cr uis e cure s Sa nat of his dysle xia thro ghu Sci en tolog y.
  • 2001 - Confused devil worshippers vandalize walls by spray painting 999 on them.
  • 2004 - Gorgoroth released their new album with Dyslexic Satan worshipping become the new subgenre called "Tarzanic Black Metal"
  • 2005 - A dyslexic devil worshipper sells his soul to Santa.
  • By 2010 it is projected that there will be over 900,000 dyslexic weevil dorshippers in the world.
  • By 2015 it is projected that 60% of all dyslexic devil worshippers will worship Santa, 30% will worship Stan, and 10% will worship Satin.
  • 3001 - The Answer to Life, The Universe, and Everything is discovered along with the question that it is the answer to. Simultaneous knowledge of both causes the Universe to vanish from existence, which is replaced by something even more bizarre.

Featured picture

Hello kitty toilet

Hello Kitty getting her groove on.

Image Credit: IMBJR
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Articles

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More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

Clock is ticking! There's only one more day to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!

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