Main Page

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search
m (F@H reskin)
m (...)
Line 1: Line 1:
{{:Babel:F@H}}
+
{{WC}}
  +
<!-- ---------- BEGINNING OF HEADER SECTION --------------------------- -->{|style="width:100%; clear: both; margin-top:+.7em;background-color:#fcfcfc;border:1px solid #ccc"
  +
|style="width:56%;color:#000"|
  +
{|style="width:280px;border:solid 0px;background:none"
  +
|-
  +
|style="width:280px;text-align:center;white-space:nowrap;color:#000" |
  +
<h1 style="font-size:162%;border:none;margin: 0;padding:.1em;color:#000">Welcome to [[Uncyclopedia:About|Uncyclopedia]],</h1>
  +
<div style="top:+0.2em;font-size: 95%">the [[content-free]] encyclopedia that [[Anonymous|anyone can edit]].</div>
  +
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%;text-align:center;font-size:85%;">[[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles in English</div>
  +
|-
  +
|}<!-- ----------Portals Follow---------------------------- -->
  +
|style="width:11%;font-size:95%" class="nounderlinelink"|
  +
*[[:Category:Politics and Government|Politics]]
  +
*[[:Category:Games|Games]]
  +
*[[:Category:Computers and Technology|Computers]]
  +
|style="width:11%;font-size:95%" class="nounderlinelink"|
  +
*[[:Category:People|People]]
  +
*[[:Category:Quaint|Quaint]]
  +
*[[:Category:Coherent|Coherent]]
  +
|style="width:11%;font-size:95%" class="nounderlinelink"|
  +
*[[:Category:Science|Science]]
  +
*[[:Category:History|History]]
  +
*'''[[Uncyclopedia:Browse|All]]'''
  +
|}
  +
  +
<!-- -------End Portals----- -->
  +
{|style="width:100%; background-color: transparent; margin-top:-.8em; margin-bottom:-.7em"
  +
|style="font-size:95%; white-space: nowrap; text-align:left"|
  +
[[Beginner's Guide]] '''&middot;''' [[Help:Contents|The Big Five]] '''&middot;''' [[Uncyclopedia:Style Guide|Style]] '''&middot;''' [[Uncyclopedia:FAQ|Questions]] '''&middot;''' [[Help:Contents|Help]] '''&middot;''' [[Uncyclopedia:Donations|Donations]]
  +
|style="font-size:95%; padding-top:10px; padding-bottom:10px; white-space: nowrap; margin:0px; text-align:right"|
  +
[[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Categories]] '''&middot;''' [[Uncyclopedia:Best of|Featured content]] '''&middot;''' [[Special:Allpages|A&ndash;Z index]]
  +
|}
  +
  +
<!-- ---------- END OF HEADER SECTION / BEGINNING OF MAIN TABLE AND LEFT-COLUMN ------------------ -->
  +
{| style="border-spacing:8px;margin:0px -8px"
  +
|width="55%" class="MainPageBG" style="border:1px solid #cef2e0; background-color:#f2fff9; vertical-align:top;"|
  +
{| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#f2fff9;"
  +
! <h2 style="margin:0;background-color:#cef2e0;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3bfb1;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;"> Today's Featured Article </h2>
  +
|-
  +
|{{Featuredarticle}}
  +
|-
  +
! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#cef2e0;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3bfb1;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Did you know...</h2>
  +
|-
  +
|{{DYK}}{{DidYouKnow}}
  +
{{DYK}}{{DidYouKnow}}
  +
{{DYK}}
  +
<div align="right" class="noprint">
  +
'''[[Did You Know|Archive]]''' &ndash; '''[[Uncyclopedia:DYK submissions|Suggest new entries]]'''
  +
</div>
  +
|-
  +
|}
  +
<!-- -------------------- START OF RIGHT-COLUMN ---------------------------------- -->
  +
|width="45%" class="MainPageBG" style="border:1px solid #cedff2; background-color:#f2f8ff; vertical-align:top;"|
  +
{| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#f2f8ff;"
  +
<!--! style="background-color:#cedff2; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size:120%; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left" | Word of the Day
  +
|-
  +
|<center><span style="font-size:130%;font-weight:bold" class="plainlinks">[[{{wotd/{{CURRENTMONTH}}}}]]</span><br />''Try to use it in conversation.<br>Knowledge is power.''</center>
  +
|--->
  +
! <h2 style="margin:0;background-color:#cedff2;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">In the news</h2>
  +
|-
  +
| {{RecentUnNews}}
  +
<div style="text-align: right;" class="noprint">
  +
'''[[UnNews:Main Page|UnNews]]''' &ndash; '''[http://www.freewebs.com/uncyclopediacast/ Radio Free Lunch]'''<br>
  +
</div>
  +
|-
  +
! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#cedff2;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">On this day...</h2>
  +
|-
  +
| <div class="nonwhite">{{Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}_{{CURRENTDAY}}}}</div>
  +
<div align="right" class="noprint">
  +
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{tomorrow}}|View tomorrow]] &ndash; [[Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}}|More anniversaries...]]'''
  +
</div>
  +
|-
  +
|}
  +
|- <!-- -------------------- START OF FEATURED PICTURE TD ------------------------------ -->
  +
|width="100%" colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border:1px solid #ddcef2; background-color:#f8f2ff; vertical-align:top;"|
  +
{| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#f8f2ff;"
  +
! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#ddcef2;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Today's featured picture</h2>
  +
|-
  +
|{{FI}}
  +
|-
  +
|}
  +
|- <!-- -------------------- Start of Recent Articles ------------------------------ -->
  +
|width="100%" colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border:1px solid #ffc9c9; background-color:#fff3f3; vertical-align:top;"|
  +
{| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#fff3f3;"
  +
! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#F2CECE;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;"><div class="plainlinks" style="float:right;margin-left:5px;margin-right:10px">''[{{SERVER}}{{localurl:Template:Recent|action=edit}} edit]''</div> Recent Articles</h2>
  +
|-
  +
|{{Recent}}
  +
  +
'''[[Special:Newpages|More recent articles]]''' |
  +
'''[[Special:Wantedpages|Most wanted pages]]''' |
  +
'''[[:Category:Rewrite|Requested rewrites]]''' |
  +
'''[[:Category:Stub|Add to stubs]]''' |
  +
'''[[Special:Lonelypages|Lonely pages]]''' |
  +
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Pee Review|Pee Review]]''' |
  +
'''[[Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles|Try writing about...]]''' |
  +
'''[[:Category:Stuck articles needing a push|Stuck articles needing a push]]'''
  +
|-
  +
|}
  +
|- <!-- -------------------- Start of Awards ------------------------------ -->
  +
|width="100%" colspan="2" class="MainPageBG" style="border:1px solid #c9c9c9; background-color:#FFFFF2; vertical-align:top;"|
  +
{| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#FFFFF2;"
  +
! <h2 style="margin:0;background:#F2F2CE;font-family:sans-serif;font-size:120%;font-weight:bold;border:1px solid #a3b0bf;text-align:left;color:#000;padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Writer and Noob of the Month</h2>
  +
|-
  +
|{{MonthlyAwards}}
  +
{{Vote Reminder}}
  +
|-
  +
|}
  +
|}
  +
{{Sisterprojects/languages}}
  +
  +
Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja]]s.
  +
[[Category: Uncyclopedia]]
  +
__NOEDITSECTION__

Revision as of 06:15, February 11, 2007

Poo Lit Surprise Logo Do you feel, funny? Well, do ya punk?
Enter The Poo Lit Surprise Writing Contest Thing.
There are prizes.
Poo Lit Surprise Logo

Welcome to Uncyclopedia,

the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.
30,754 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Today's Featured Article

Today's Featured Article - Samsung

Samsungrange

Samsung is a Korean manufacturer of smartphones, phablets[2] and tablets, that people are compelled to buy once every six months, without fail. Otherwise they will stare down the gauntlet of ridicule and social ruin for having a portable device with a gigantic screen that can disappointingly only be read from the Moon, compared to the new model, which has an even more gigantic screen that can be read from the outer planets and further.

The modern corporation is a secretive family-owned conglomerate and, like all secretive family-owned conglomerates famed for their work on the big screen, it also has interests in the chemicals and shipping industries to complement its manufacturing credentials. Curiously, Samsung is yet to put a finger in the bolt-cutter and Robert DeNiro industries, though.

Samsung is also one of the world's most prolific innovators in the IT sphere, and the leading employer of engineers and scientists with degrees on "big", PhDs on "shiny" and Nobel Prizes for "screen". They've pioneered such innovations as the touch screen, the integration of the Android OS, and a new generation of semiconductor that makes hair and fingernails fall out. However the R&D team has never quite mastered the most profitable addition to an electronic product; the Apple logo.. (more...)

Recently featured: Samsung - Solar flares

Yesterday's Featured Article - Solar flares

800px-Magnificent CME Erupts on the Sun - August 31

Solar flares are inexplicable fiery eruptions that occur on the surface of the Sun and make for some pretty cool desktop wallpapers. A single solar flare can release up to 6 × 1025 joules of heat into the vast vacuum of space, enough energy to power the city of Baltimore for far too long. The phenomenon is one of the leading wasters of energy in the universe, second only to people who forget to turn off the lights when they leave a room. Currently, nobody knows for certain how or why solar flares occur, although several theories have been developed by the American Astronomical Society and the very vocal scientific experts that comment on Yahoo! News articles.

One of the most widely accepted explanations for the phenomenon is that solar flares are actually maritime distress signals launched by astronauts floating in the Sun's vast oceans, which would explain their name. After the Space Shuttle Columbia disintegrated while reentering the Earth's atmosphere, neither the crew nor their flare guns were recovered, leading some to believe that the ship's crew escaped on a life boat to the Sun and now sets off flares periodically in hopes of signaling NASA scientists. Some have gone as far as to say that other forms of extraterrestrial life have also become stranded on the Sun's surface after crashing their flying saucers, but those people are just crazy.(more...)

Did you know...

*...that this statement is not not not not not not not not not not not possibly confusing to no one somewhere right now?
  • ...that it was I who let the dogs out?
  • ...that this statement is not not not not not not not not not not not possibly confusing to no one somewhere right now?
  • ...that it was I who let the dogs out?
  • ...that this statement is not not not not not not not not not not not possibly confusing to no one somewhere right now?

In the news

Downtown cold.jpg




On this day...

NoAbstinence

November 26: National Day in the Republic of Bulimia, International Abstinence Rejection Day.

  • 1528 - Rabbits, who were for so long the world's dominant species, become stupid and incompetent by staring out to sea to look for their carrots
  • 1622 - Tony Blair rejects the invention of a sandwich. Fish and chips are hereby the 'standard' lunch item for schoolboys. Oscar Wilde moonwalks at a nightclub in Moscow. Michael Jackson boards an aeroplane as soon as word reaches the Neverland ranch.
  • 1989 - Year 1989 gets lost in history and cunningly disguises itself as the year 1789. No success yet recorded
  • 1800 - Something vaguely interesting probably happened today, but we don't give a fuck.
  • 1818 - The Republic of Bulimia declares its independence from Spain.
  • 1971 - Jim Morrison dies a virgin.
  • 1984 - Rumors flare that Irish band U2 actually originate from Eurasia. Fans rebel, labelling them doubleplusgood.
  • 1999 - Chastity belts are outlawed and replaced with Chastity lasers.
  • 2010 - It all ended (more or less - although to be honest, it's really more less than more).
  • 2013 - Tragic death of Lurgan (Northern Ireland) celebrity Willy the Tramp after an overdose of Buckfast
  • 2090 - The last Christian dies due to practising abstinence.
  • 2100 - The Republic of Bulimia mysteriously disappears. David Blaine denies involvement due to being dead.

Today's featured picture

Godpissed

God is pissed.

Image Credit: Tripod2282
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Articles

Nirvana | Gensokyo | Sonichu | CHU | Star Trek: Enterprise | Rough Gay Wolf Sex (rw) | Darth Vader (rw) | Samsung | Meco Monardo | Independent film | Jeb Bush (rw) | William F. Buckley | Sens. Warren/Ayotte/Brown/McConnell | Greggs (rw) | Space Shuttle Challenger (rw) | Solar flares | Maurice Ravel | Dudley | Availability | UnDebate:Should women rap? | Banh Shop | Worst bumper stickers | Firesheep | Lava lamp | Ebola | Brick (rw) | Chess


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

Now you only have 4, yes 4 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month, GET VOTING!!

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Logo Text Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes2 UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
Unbooks-logo notext UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable-logo-en vector notext Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity-logo-notext Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetialogo UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext UnCommons
Broken media repository


Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 30,754 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
45286
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
18180
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
W17x11 16666
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
1dÉ
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
W17x11 8364
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
W17x11 10392
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5720
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
W17x11 Unknown
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7614
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.

Personal tools
projects