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{{FA|date=1 April 2008|revision=2907173|hidden=unlike your mom from a mile away}}

Latest revision as of 19:03, August 21, 2014

Welcome to Uncyclopedia,
the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.
30,843 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations

Categories · Featured content · A–Z index

Today's Featured Article - Constitution of the United States (actual text)

Sigs

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Section I. Any male constituent who has attained the Age of Twenty-One years shall vote for a nobleman of his choosing to represent him in the executive legislature. He shall freely cast his choice on a ballot in a designated voting bureau and deposit the ballot in a box. After all the constituents accomplished their duty of Citizenry, the box contents shall be dumped in the nearest river and the predetermined winner be announced to the People.

Section II. Any elected representative in the Land of the Free shall receive 10 slaves Free of charge, only shipping and handling to pay and shall be refunded if not satisfied before 30 days.(more...)

Yesterday's Featured Article - Power

Creation of the Sun and Moon face detail

Power . A word that is doubtless familiar to you and a concept you probably think you understand but yet, how much do we you really know about power?

Not much!

That's correct, bodiless, unexplained, yet helpful italicised text! We know next to nothing about power which, in its majesty is in all things, if you can comprehend such a concept. It could even be within you! You could have power right now and be unaware of the staggering implications of that fact.

I could have power?

Quite possibly, I can usually tell very quickly whether or not somebody has power. I have power and as a result I feel a certain kinship towards others with power.

I'd love to hear more about power!

Of course you would! (more...)

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Cologne, featured on 1 February 2014. See the featured version.
Yellow fever, featured on 01 February 2011. See the featured version.
Amerigo Vespucci, featured on 1 February 2010. See the featured version.

Did you know...

Sumoworkout

In the news

On this day...

Insertpic

[Insert double entendre here]

February 1: International [Insert holiday here] day
  • 24398 BC- First fat kid falls down flight of stairs.
  • 1500 AD - Caveman invents the kayak
  • 1501 AD - Caveman invents the bus
  • 1931-Boris Yeltsin born; his mother has a vodka drink while he is still in the womb, thus born drunk. *<nowiki>[Insert year here] - [Insert event here]
  • [Insert a year from 0-43 AD here] - [Insert overdone Jesus joke here]
  • [Insert 1337 here] - [Insert tired, pointless noob joke here]
  • A Peruvian Boeing 737 crashes in the Andes - killing 123 people. pwned by mountains ;[
  • [Insert year here] - [Insert event here]
  • [Insert date that doesn't follow the given order at all] - [Insert sexual innuendo with[insert name here] and [insert name here] along with an event that defies logic]
  • [Insert year here] - [Insert overdone European reference here]
  • [Insert year here] - [Insert event here]
  • [Insert year here] - [Insert event here]
  • [Insert completely random date here] - [Insert absurd event here]
  • [Insert year here] - [Insert event that takes place in Paris here] - [Insert sentence containing 'Rioting' here]
  • [Insert year here] - [Insert event here]
  • [Insert year here] - [Insert denial of event here]
  • 2006 - James Blunt admits he was fed helium as a child and recommends it too the youth of today
  • 20X6 - Correct me if I'm wrong but are you asking me for a challenge?!?!
  • [Insert A.D. 2101 here] - [Insert tired, pointless All Your Base reference here]
  • [Insert date absurdly far into the future here] - [Insert joke about robot overlords here]
  • [Insert (absurdly large number times two absurdly large numbers)AD here] - [Insert worn out and over used joke about a clone of your mother and me here].

Today's featured picture

Osamabingrinchen1

Osama bin Grinchen has declared Jihad on the holiday season and commands Islamists to ruin it for infidel children worldwide.

Image Credit: Modusoperandi
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Articles

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Potatohead aqua Featured Article  (read another featured article) Featured version: 1 April 2008
This article has been featured on the front page. — You can vote for or nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.
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