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'''Welcome to the Swiss [[Uncyclopedia]]''', the [[neutral]] encyclopedia that [[Help:HowTo|anyone can edit]] but only if they have sufficient funds.
 
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<p style="margin:0 0 0 3%;text-align:center;font-size:94%">[[Sophia]] has opened [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] numbered bank accounts since opening in January 2005.<br>
 
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<p style="font-variant: small-caps; text-align:center; margin-top: 0; margin-bottom:.2em; font-size: 80%;">[[:Category:Sex|Sex]] | [[:Category:Games|War]] | [[:Category:Computers and Technology|Bank Vault Technology]] | [[:Category:People|Reservists]] | [[:Category:Quaint|Female Emancipation]] | [[:Category:Coherent|4 Offical Languages]] <br> [[Special:Popularpages|Most Wealthy]] | [[Special:Allpages|Numerical Index]] | [[Uncyclopedia:Browse|Not Money, Choclate or Cucckoo Clocks...]]</p>
 
 
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* Bienvenue à [[fr:|l'Uncyclopédia suisse]], l'encyclopédie tout-à-fait neutre et fait complètement de fromage que n'importe qui peut redacter s'ils ont des fonds suffisants. [[Sophia]] a établi [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] comptes bancaires numérotés en suisse depuis l'ouverture en janvier 2005. Avant l'édition, lisez SVP les [[Help:HowTo|directives d'investissement, de bénéfice de guerre]] et le [[Flamewar Guidelines|manuel de neutralité]]!
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* Willkommen an [[de:|Uncyclopedia Schweizer]], sorgt die neutrale Enzyklopädie dafür gänzlich von Käse, daß jeder veröffentlichen kann, wenn sie ausreichende Fonds haben. [[Sophia]] hat [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] Bankkonten eröffnet, die seit der Öffnung im Januar 2005 numeriert wurden. Vor der Ausgabe lesen die Richtlinien der [[Help:HowTo|Investition von Kriegsgewinn]] und das [[Flamewar Guidelines|Neutralitätshandbuch]]!
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* Benvenuto al [[it:|Uncyclopedia svizzero]], l'enciclopedia neutra che chiunque può pubblicare ma soltanto se hanno fondi monetari suffient. [[Sophia]] ha aperto [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] clienti numerati della banca dall'apertura nel mese di gennaio del 2005. Prima della pubblicazione, legga prego la guida di riferimento di [[Help:HowTo|investimento di profitto di guerra]] ed il [[Flamewar Guidelines|manuale di neutralità]].
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Protected by [[Help:Fair Use|the Fair Use Clause]], and an elite clan of [[Clinja]]s.
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Protected by a [[Help:Fair Use|Half Million Man Army]], and their [[Special:listadmins|knives]].
 

Latest revision as of 16:27, August 9, 2015

Welcome to Uncyclopedia,
the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.
31,383 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Categories · Featured content · A–Z index · F icon

Today's Featured Article -

Recently featured: Community

Yesterday's Featured Article - Community

Meet-the-clangers

A community is a collection of humans, thought of as an undifferentiated unit. This means that individual differences of opinion can be denied, disparaged, or dealt with through unactionable campaign promises or Special Limited-Time Offers. Why one should think of humans as an undifferentiated unit is an open question. It works for a herd of grazing cows; they demonstrate all the typical traits of a community. By comparison, if the human world were a community, one would assume the victims of an opera-house massacre would not have scrambled to find the nearest exit.

To understand how a community works, we need to look at the Human Condition: "the characteristics, key events, and situations essential to human existence." Examples are: broadband speed, fashion, drama, perceived individuality and whether a smoker or non-smoker. The Human Condition is very broad (more so in American ballparks), and is pondered and analyzed from perspectives including philosophy, art, sociology, ethnic cleansers, and despots.

As a literary term, "the Human Condition" is typically used in the context of ambiguous subjects, such as what is the right hair color. Once the literature is bought by Hollywood, the Human Condition is subordinate to conditioner, and then hair color including metal-flaking. The Human Condition describes the moral compass heading that keeps the individual from being lost in a crowd professing to have the identical compass heading. A community is a social unit of any size that shares these common values, or at least pretends to in public. (more...)

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Confidence, featured on 5 May 2012. See the featured version.
Ovum, featured on 5 May 2011. See the featured version.

Did you know...

150x150 BETbooty
  • ...that BET is dedicated to bringing quality entertainment to the masses? (pictured)
  • ...that you can get great deals on Vietnamese clothing imports if you buy now?
  • ...that one person can change the world?
  • ...that Uncyclopedia is riddled with subliminal messages? DRINK COCA COLA
  • ...that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted?
  • ...that since haste makes waste, and slow and steady wins the race, it follows that everybody who loses a race must therefore be charged with littering?
  • ...that Wikipedia features DYKs about mosaic floors that were discovered between 1932 and 1939?

In the news:

On this day...

May 5: Cinco de Mayonnaise (Mexico)

Today's featured picture

DogLabels

By popular demand, the National Pet Association has released a new guide for the best household chemicals to use for exploding your dog. Caveat Canem, indeed.

Image Credit: MoneySign
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Articles

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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,383 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
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W17x11 30557
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W17x11 16666
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Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.

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