FANDOM


The content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit.
32,402 articles in English

Beginner's Guide · Skin Choice · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Categories · Featured content · A–Z index · F icon

Today's Featured Article - Southern Poverty Law Center

SPLC HQ

The Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) is an American nonprofit legal advocacy organization that promotes civil rights in America by suing bad people into bankruptcy. Based in Montgomery, Alabama, it has won legal cases against white supremacist groups such as the Ku Klux Klan, for-profit prison corporations, and slumlords holding more than $100 million of properties needing $1 billion of repairs, along with bank accounts of tens of billions. The SPLC has determined that most American citizens who post racial slurs on social media are members of hate groups and other extremist organizations. It also promotes compulsory tolerance re-education programs for bad people.

The SPLC was founded by the reverend Morris Dees and sir Joseph J. Levin Jr. in 1971 as a civil rights law firm after Dees' earlier attempt to start a new religion named "Deesianity" failed to attract attention. This was due largely in part to the success of Unitarian Universalism having already taken hold several decades prior, and the rise of Discordianism. Civil rights leader Julian Bond served as chairman of the bored, until he resigned in 1979 due to boredom. Because old age is usually boring, especially the pain and suffering part.

Recently featured: Southern Poverty Law Center

Yesterday's Featured Article -

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured H. P. Lovecraft, featured on 22 April 2016. See the featured version.

Did you know...

Z3797862
  • ... that I hear voices outside my room? (pictured)
  • ... that a hammer is a great diplomatic tool?
    • ... although on an international level, a nuclear arsenal is even better?
  • ... the White House is really off-white?
  • ... that Every Good Boy Does Floccinaucinihilipilification?
  • ... that many diseases can be prevented by washing hands before eating, after eating, during eating, and another couple of times just in case?
  • ... that the Mayan colander was a drain on its civilization?
  • ... that many diseases can be prevented by washing hands before eating, after eating, during eating, and another couple of times just in case?

In the news:

On this day...

2003-22-a-web

April 22: National Try To Assassinate The President Day (United States of America), Mars Day (Mars)

  • 1,200,000,000,000,000,000 BCE - The planet Mars is born.
  • 1,199,999,999,999,999,999 BCE - The planet Mars loses all its liquid water, all life dies out although there's none, and the planet turns red.
  • 500,000,000,000,000 BCE - The Big Bang thing happened although that tiny space carried the entire universe, and gravity was so strong, no bang could make that thing separate.
  • 4,514,159,265 BCE - Earth becomes a hot lava ball in the middle of nowhere.
  • 8000 BCE - Mars, the Roman god of war, is born. He is named after the planet.
  • 1188 - The Earth cooled down and life multiplies way too quickly and ruins the entire planet.
  • 1189 - Eleanor of Aquitaine announces that she would hang her necklace from her nipples, but rescinds her decision because "it would shock the children."
  • 1420 - Johannes Gutenberg becomes a father. He names his firstborn son "Steve".
  • 1468 - The Great Council of the Republic of Venice attempts to curb the power of the Council of Ten by cutting off one of its fingers.
  • 1609 - Council of Antes declares that peas will henceforth be eaten with a fork.
  • 1882 - First obscene phone call made; crude equipment mandates heavy breathing when careless whispers can not be heard.
  • 1900 - Families all over the world clamor for Jell-O for their just desserts.
  • 1962 - Lee Harvey Oswald fucks up his first attempt to kill JFK so badly the attempt goes unnoticed until 1986, when a remodeling crew fixes the bullet hole.
  • 1970 - The Partridge Family thinks it loves you, but what is it so afraid of?
  • 1970 - An Environmental Teach-In attempts to celebrate Earth Day. The event was a miserable failure because it was discovered that Earth was actually created on September 26.
  • 1981 - A second failed assassination attempt on Ronald Reagan takes place, the shooter's motive being Reagan's films which the shooter declared "sucked".
  • 1999 - Meatloaf declares that he would do anything for love, but under no circumstance would he do that. It turns out that 'that' refers to painting himself black and impersonating Al Jolson.
  • 2002 - WWE star "The Rock" invents the ability to refer to himself in the fifth person, negating the need for the 1st, 2nd 3rd and 4th references.
  • 2003 - A pretzel tries to assassinate president George W. Bush. The pretzel is arrested and later executed by garbage disposal.
  • 2010 - Bill Gates logs on to Uncyclopedia and reads the Anniversaries page for April 22.
  • 2022 - Darth Vader gets his voice box fixed after decades of agony.

Today's featured picture

IndyWrappedmm

NEW! Individual wrappings prevent Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

Image Credit: MoneySign
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Articles

Cindy FFXV repairing car.jpg

Final Fantasy XV (pictured) | Langolier (r/w) | Edmonton Oilers | The Sacred Riana | Clickbait | Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII | Southern Poverty Law Center | Michael J. Dunleavy | F-35 | Hermann Fegelein | Southern Baptists (r/w) | Florida (r/w) | Map (r/w) | Natural stupidity effect | Bobby Davro | 14th century |




More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Articles to fix | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about...

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Logo Text Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes2 UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
Unbooks-logo notext UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable-logo-en vector notext Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity-logo-notext Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetialogo UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext UnCommons
Broken media repository


Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 32,402 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
30557
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
45286
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
18180
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
16666
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
13518
Wiki it
1dÉ
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
8364
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
10392
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5720
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
Unknown
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7614
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.

Potatohead aqua Featured Article  (read another featured article) Featured version: 1 April 2008
This article has been featured on the main page. — You can vote for or nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.
<includeonly>Template:FA/01 April 2008Template:FA/2008</includeonly>