is a 2003 third-person shooter Drake of the 99 Dragons video game for the Xbox and Windows. In the game, the clan of the 99 Dragons has been wiped out and the artifact they were supposed to be guarding slips into the wrong hands, while they were all distracted by being murdered. One of the clan members, Drake, doesn't let death get in the way of destiny, and returns from the grave to avenge his clan, recover the carelessly lost item, and show them that living post-mortem may present a challenge to the nostrils or finding a partner, but should not have an effect on basic guard duties.
Drake received universal acclaim, redefining the standard for great games alongside , released the same week. Developer Idol FX planned on making a comic book and cartoon based on it, but the game was too good to waste time letting people read or watch its great story. All in told, the games' sales Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing made its developers even richer than Bill Gates.
The primary objective of
Drake is to find those bastards who murdered your clan and shoot them in the face. To do so, the player uses a wide array of violent gut-splattering firearms. Like an Italian chef that has just has his veal cutlet returned by a customer, Drake uses the strategy of darting around and flailing his arms everywhere, then randomly shooting the nearest person without looking. (
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On this day...
(extends until tomorrow)
March 20: Procrastination Day c.170 million BCE - Sloths plot their invasion of Africa but are thwarted by continental drift before they can act.
8065 BCE - Atlantis passes flood control legislation but never gets around to buying the equipment to implement it.
814 - Charlemagne devises a plan for world peace but fails to write it down before he dies.
1510 - Martin Luther writes his 95 Theses and intends to post them, but keeps forgetting to bring nails to hammer them to the church door when he attends Sunday services.
1602 - The Dutch East India Company is founded, paving the way for the trade of such goods as sugar, spices, human slaves, and additional sugar.
1815 - After escaping from his exile in Elba using cheese, cocked berets, and other French sterotypes, Napoleon Bonaparte begins his "Hundred Days" Rule.
1833 - Honest Jim starts his career by selling his grandfather's false teeth back to him at nine times their original value.
1852 - Hariet Beecher Stowe's Uncle Tom's Cabin is published, setting racial equality back for an estimated two hundred years.
1864 - Dick Cheney gets bitten by a vampire. The vampire dies of poisoning.
1883 - Eleven counties signed the Paris Convention for the Protection of Industrial Property, strictly outlawing the trade of ideas, dreams, and mind-control paraphernelia.
1914 - The first International Figure Skating World Championships take place in Connecticut. The losers maintain their dignity.
1984 - Dungeons & Dragons hits a new high note with the introduction of the Stock Broker playable character set, including Briefcase of Monotony and +2 Ballpoint Pen.
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