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Today's Featured Article - Gul Dukat

Dukat

Gul Dukat is a wise Cardassian statesman and cuddly little genocidal maniac from the TV series's Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Keeping Up with the Cardassians, and Gul Dukat Takes Miami. He is widely regarded as being the nicest character in TV history, but is constantly suffering from abuse by the other characters.

Before the beginning of the show, I, Dukat served as the prefect of the planet Bajor, which was under Cardassian occupation protection because they were really weak, primitive and pathetic and didn't know how to take care of themselves. They needed Dukat, to govern and defend them and he was there to help. Unfortunately, at this time, Bajor was threatened by evil terrorists who wanted to overthrow the legitimate government of Bajor, expel their Cardassian protectors, and establish a planet-wide theocracy.

Now, Dukat tried to be as kind as possible towards the Bajoran people, going out of my his way many times to hand out stuffed animals and apple juice. But the Bajorans complained that these had been produced in Bajoran work camps which for some reason upset them. Whatever, more Teddies for me. These happy work camps were created by the Cardassians to help train the primitive Bajorians in more modern ways of manufacturing (and to partially off-set the cost of protecting Bajor). (more...)

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Rod serling
  • ... that in another time and place Rod Serling existed as a discarded cardboard cutout on the set of the Twilight Zone? (pictured)
  • ... that no greater man hath subtriculated the monolith than the one who hath manifested odontological callioptery?
  • ... thanks to a transporter accident, the joke about suicide bombers' 72 virgins being Star Trek geeks is older than Islam?
  • ... that anyone who dies at Disneyland receives a free lifetime pass?
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Oadray ignsay (ropcay)

Une-jay 15: Ig-pay Atin-lay Ay-day

  • 1066 - Agnet-may Ars-cay are-ay atented-pay.
  • 1067 - E-tay Ishop-bay of-ay East-ay Anglia-ay invents-ay ocolate-chay.
  • 1219 - Denmark's flag, oldest in history, falls out of the sky. A battle between the Danish and some country of lesser importance then turns in the favor of the Danes, likely because the flag landed point-down on the King of the other country, say intelligent Harvard graduates. Pig Latin professionals will later laugh at the inability to translate this long sentence into Pig Latin.
  • 1777 - Illard-may Illmore-fay eates-cray e-thay Ig-pay Atin-lay Olitical-pay Arty-pay, a-ay one-issue-ay arty-pay evoted-day o-tay aking-may Ig-pay Atin-lay e-thay ational-nay anguage-lay.
  • 1836 - Arkansas becomes a state. Pig latin lobbyists disappointed by impossibility of the name.
  • 1877 - Illard-may Illmore-fay as-hay a-ay entennial-cay elebration-cay. Oth-bay embers-may ow-shay up-ay.
  • 1878 - Illard-may Illmore-fay ives-gay up-ay altogether-ay, and-ay erases-ay everyone's-ay ind-may of is-hay arty-pay.
  • 1905 - Apmobile-cray ounded-fay y-bay Omas-thay Apper-cray in-ay Etroit-day, MI.
  • 1975 - Angelina-ay Olie-jay is-ay orn-bay in-ay Uuk-nay, Eenland-gray. Er-hay Eskimo-ay eritage-hay accounts-ay or-fay er-hay ood-gay ooks-lay.
  • 1992 - Usic-may as-ay e-way ow-knay it-ay, ecides-day o-tay implode-ay. Is-thay is-ay ood-gay ecause-bay eople-pay art-stay istening-lay o-tay etro-ray.
  • 2005 - Pope announces all new announcements will be announced by announcement in Pig Latin.
  • 2006 - Ew-nay Opep-ay lectede-ay.
  • 2018 - Ey-hay, at's-thay oday-tay!
  • 2018 - Uh-thy ope-pey eclairs-day at-they oose-mey as-brey are-ay illegal-ay.(-day)

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