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Today's Featured Article - Next Year's Australian Grand Prix

After years of Ferrari-dominated tedium, the period from 2008-2011 saw significant rule changes for Formula 1 leading to some of the most interesting seasons ever. Formula 1 boss, Bernie "Bilbo" Ecclestone quickly realised the commercial possibilities of removing all rules. He proposed taking Formula 1 from its traditional race-circuit home and back onto the streets of the world. He also proposed extending the races from three hours to several days with each Grand Prix being a two stage, cross-country rally of a whole continent, thereby increasing the likelihood of overtaking and, coincidentally, potential advertising revenue.

Pit bosses across Formula 1 were outraged and within days the chief engineers of both Honda and Toyota had committed ritual suicide on Japanese Children's television, while Renault bosses had shrugged dismissively and Ferrari boss, Stefano Domenicali, complained that the changes were aimed at them. (More...)

Recently featured: UnBooks:Tropic of Cancer - UnNews:Bomb bomb bomb – bomb bomb McCain - Reverse Holocaust - Super Mario Brothers - The Great Elephant Revolt of 2011 - Salvador Dalí

Archive – Vote for featured articles

Yesterday's Featured Article - UnBooks:Tropic of Cancer

Preface by George Orwell: We see in Henry Miller's novel a beautiful melody of hardcore, nasty sex and pointless existential drivel. Miller is such a rich creature revelling in a multitude of emotions dealing with sex and the need to buy it. He is also a man consumed by a desire to deride those around him, possibly because he is insecure. He also objectifies women, possibly because he's a man, or maybe bad engrams. Anyhow, that’s enough from me.

Chapter One: or something like that, Miller never bothered

I'm living at the Villa Borghese, I am watching Star Trek, I went out today to see if I could sponge some more food and money and maybe even find a bit of totty to keep me company. As I walked along some French street, filled with garbage, trash and Jews an immense feeling of horniness kicked in. (More...)

Featured today, a long long time ago

UnNews:Humans evolved from dinosaurs, featured on 18 May 2011. See the featured version.
HowTo:Be Enthusiastic Like Jack Black, featured on 18 May 2010. See the featured version.
Why?:Don't You Get a Job?, featured on 18 May 2009. See the featured version.
Ferdinand von Zeppelin, featured on 18 May 2008. See the featured version.
Lord of the Flies, featured on 18 May 2007. See the featured version.

Did you know...

...that the waterways of Oslo, Norway are much like Venice, except that they are open sewers? (pictured)

...that if you give a mouse a cookie, he'll ask for some milk, and if you give him some milk he'll ask for world domination?

...that the The Swedish Orienteering And Firing A Rat From A Cannon Championships are the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems?
...that the bird is the word?

...that it's time to get your penis removed?
... that suppositories are not related to your family?

...that the 2004 video game "EXPLODE!!!" was given the "Tommy Tallarico Best Game Ever" award due to the fact that you can "blow up fire hydrants and dentists"?

Archive – Suggest new entries

In the news
Man buys Kmart just to get rid of its "shoddy" merchandise "To the Moon for real this time!", says Obama (pictured) Bogus hooker sells sex in Mississippi Motorist hits moose, forgets collision Prison officials defend execution of wrong man Junior designer makes her own prom dress Gov. Jerry Brown pleads poverty World to hold joint anti-terror war games in Syria Elizabeth Warren destroys the universe. Blacks back Obama; say it's okay for him to be gay Obama mobbed at Clooney's gay gala Mother wins back semi-permanent custody of obese boy Bankers agree to forfeit their bonuses in return for baby souls Canada's new phunny munny Martial arts pervert banned from Earth UnNews – Radio Free Lunch
On this day...
May 18: Eat Your Meat Day (India) 4829 BC - Oedipus Rex kills his mother and marries his father. 10 - Hannibal crosses the Alps and eats his enemies. 875 - The first SAT test is administered. 876 - The first SAT prep academy is founded. 1664 - The FBI is founded. 1810 - FWAAC is outlawed. 1910 - George Bush does not get any pudding 1948 - Time Magazine's printing press malfunctions. Time pauses for 5 hours and 23 minutes. 1972 - Marylin Manson is born. He cries. 1975 - Humpty Dumpty falls off the Berlin Wall. 2006 - The Nike Revolution starts. 2007 - Veggies are outlawed. 2007 - Marylin Manson smiles, looks in the mirror and then cries again. 2014 - Your mom has an erection. 2940 - The first T-rex is spotted since Jurassic times. View tomorrow – More anniversaries...

Today's featured picture

This photograph, recently discovered in the Bundesarchiv, gives a rare insight into the inner workings of the Third Reich

Image Credit: Concept: Zombiebaron. Image: some guy
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

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Recent Articles

Writer, Noob, and Uncyclopedian of the Month

The dancing banana Shabidoo stepped up to the plate and joined all the other fruits to be honoured with Writer of the Month in April. He is the author of works like HowTo:Make Breakfast Dew (For Women), Ozone, Nothing is permanent and Mahjong. Shabido is a keen collaborator with others and an organiser of events, so perhaps we can see a future career path for this particular Uncyclopedian. Shabido is also a regular contributor to 'my two cents worth' style of forums (in a good way) and has yet to swap unbridled enthusiasm for world weary cynicism that is a mark of some of the veteran contributors to this site. Shine on Shabidoo until that banana stops dancing to the music of time...(as isn't it time you got off that computer and come and talk to the rest of your family?).

No longer is this 'Noob of the Month' but 'Noob of the Moment. We all have our moments, certainly in our later years. This April three Noobs are honoured. Now that there is no time limit on 'noobery', these three have been honoured this month.

First to get our notice was XDshempXD, a self described Mexican enduring life in the USA. What's more, XDShempXD is a woman, yes to all you short trousered wearers and code kiddies, a girl has come to your party! So behave now and wash your faces more often. XDshempXD (can we call you Shempy??) has been here since the middle of 2011 and has brought with her stories with a more more Latin American flavour. So now we have articles like UnBooks:Sexually suggestive songs by Roberto Carlos which confused me as I thought it was about an ex-Brazilian football player but is indeed someone closer to home for her. Our second Noob of the Moment is Alpha Quintesson. He has gravitated to what I like to call the 'sharp end' of Uncyclopedia, rooting out and alerting the dinosaur speedy admins here about some nasty little vandals trying to upset the organised, efficient work processes here. I hope he can also find time to write a bit more as well. Finally there is Mockingbird ST. What the ST stands remains a mystery... or no one has asked him as yet (probably the latter). It's a great user name all the same though perhaps some people may want to kill him for literary title reasons. I hope not, otherwise we would not have articles like Counting to potato to consider.

Like receiving a carriage clock, a ticket to the ballet or a new set of teeth, the monthly award for general all round usefulness is a recognition that this user is now reaching a pinnacle... or is that a Pinocchio of achievement. In April the community voted in favour of Funnybony. For those who don't know 'FB', he has been one of this site's most prolific of authors. His user page is almost groaning under the weight of his many works but something isn't so well known, FB is one of the most generous, and genuine guys here. FB likes to talk, work with other people and even if you don't vote in favour of one his works, FB remains a model of politeness. He is also a friend of Jeff Beck and was really there in the 1960s when music became the cultural phenomena of that decade. Funnybony doesn't need to be here, he could be sitting on a verandah drinking or meditating or both but instead he likes to write for fun. Uncyclopedia has certainly benefitted from his output. What more can I, or we, say about that. Now... Funnybony, do really want that clock...?

Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.

UnNews The news source on crack	Uncyclopedia The content-free encyclopedia	Undictionary The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes Where noisy things can live and prosper	Games Another way to waste time	HowTo Instructions and guides for anything and everything
UnBooks Content-free books	Unquotable Useless misquotes galore	Uncycloversity If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetia Poetry for people who hate poetry	UnDebate Debating all the irrelevant issues	UnScripts We can ruin stage and film too
Why? Don't make me explain it to you twice	UnReviews We'll tell you why things suck	UnCommons Broken media repository

Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 29,439 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:

	Uncyclopedia English United Kingdom Wikipedia lol left 30649	Desciclopédia Português Brazil Wikipedia lol left 35457	アンサイクロペディア日本語 Japan Wikipedia lol left 16220	Nonsensopedia Polski Poland Wikipedia lol left 20323	Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy Wikipedia lol left 12328
	Désencyclopédie Français France Wikipedia lol left 7257	Inciclopedia Español Spain Wikipedia lol left 8775	偽基百科正體中文 Taiwan Wikipedia lol left 5328	Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany Wikipedia lol left 5520	Hikipedia Suomi Finland Wikipedia lol left 6804
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on Wikipedia lol left August 12, 2011.

Other Uncyclopedias

	백괴사전 한국어 South Korea Wikipedia lol left 4861	ไร้สาระนุกรม ไทย Thailand Wikipedia lol left 2533	Pekepedia Tagalog Philippines Wikipedia lol left 266	Bodohpedia Bahasa Melayu Malaysia Wikipedia lol left 113	伪基百科汉语 Commie China Wikipedia lol left 3152
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	Spademanns Leksikon Dansk Denmark Wikipedia lol left 5792	Ikkepedia Norsk Norway Wikipedia lol left 5049	Ikkjepedia Norsk (nynorsk) Norway	Psyklopedin Svenska Sweden Wikipedia lol left 2590	Անգրագ իտարան Հայերեն Armenia Wikipedia lol left 20	ວິກິພີເດຍ ລາວ Laos Wikipedia lol left 7
	Valenciclopèdia Català Andorra Wikipedia lol left 601	Nunyepedia Asturianu Asturias Wikipedia lol left 71	Desgalipedia Galego Galicia Wikipedia lol left 348	Oisquipèdia Occitan Occitania Wikipedia lol left 69	আনসাইক্ল োপিডিয়া বাংলা Bangladesh Wikipedia lol left 15
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	Нециклопедија Српски Serbia Wikipedia lol left 576	Neciklopedija Bosanski Bosnia Wikipedia lol left 61	Neciklopediju Hrvatski Croatia Wikipedia lol left 686	Butalopedija Slovenščina Slovenia Wikipedia lol left 115	Википедија Македонски Macedonia Wikipedia lol left 80
	Oncyclopedia Nederlands Holland Wikipedia lol left 2179	Kwatsjpedia Limburgs Limburgs Wikipedia lol left 41	Necyklopedie Česky Czech Republic Wikipedia lol left 2369	Necyklopedia Slovenčina Slovakia Wikipedia lol left 1508	Unciklopédia Magyar Hungary Wikipedia lol left 1640
	Оксипедия Български Bulgaria Wikipedia lol left 162	Neciclopedie Română Romania Wikipedia lol left 119	Uichipedia Молдовеняскэ Moldova Wikipedia lol left 82	Інциклопедія Українська Ukraine Wikipedia lol left 1088	Абсурдопедия Русский Russia Wikipedia lol left 3634
	Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia Wikipedia lol left 127	Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia Wikipedia lol left 274	Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania Wikipedia lol left 320	Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto Wikipedia lol left 2020	Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths Wikipedia lol left 32
	Necyclopædia Latina Vatican City Wikipedia lol left 190	Hatsiklopedia Malagasy Madagascar Wikipedia lol left 11	Zombiepedia Zombie Chapel Wikipedia lol left 23
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on Wikipedia lol left August 12, 2011.