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MSN or Men Sex Network or even My Smelly Nob are collections of Internet services provided by Minisin. Initially released by accident on August 24, 1995, to coincide with the release of Widow's 950000, the range of services has not changed. The Hotflail was then introduced, a service to kill all n00bs with a burning flail. This was later changed to Widow's Laxative Flail. The instant fast-food service MSN Messer, was recently replaced by a tramp called: "Widow's Laxative Mess". It is also home to the evil of msn names

MSN was largely re-branded in 2006 when Minisin overhauled its online software and services in a climate of increasing competition from rivals such as Gargole, Yak who? and Skip. (Should I even mention AOL and all that disgrace?)

In the United States, this is not just a content provider and search engine, this is a Widow's unbearably cool mouth-watering and desirably home-made content provider and search engine. It is additionally a ISP (ice-cream sucker party). With 9 subscribers (perhaps 90), MSN is the second largest ice-cream sucker party in the US behind AOL suckers service with 26.5 people, the .5 being a Hobbit by the name of John.

The term "MSN" has come to be synonymous with MSN Messenger in T'internet slang. To use MSN services, the users must let Minisin hack their computer using Microsoft Hacking Device and huff all the "SYSTEM 32" files. One can sign up using any e-mail address (although it will not alert you of any incoming emails if you use non-widowed addresses, which is only understandable behaviour of the widow), and can then use personalised MSN (now Laxative) features requiring the use of a Microsoft Hacking Device. These personalised features include "My MiniSexNutter", "Hotflail" and the ability to sign into "Widow's Laxative Mess"(formerly MSN Messer), and the now retired Widow's Mess.

Contents 1 History 2 The Percentage Of MSN Users 3 Flash! Flash! 4 Side-Effects 4.1 The Average MSN Conversation 4.2 Standard MSN Conversation between a male and a female 4.3 Standard MSN Conversation between a male and a female who have not talked before 4.4 Standard MSN Conversation between two male furries who haven't met 4.5 Standard MSN Conversation between a regular male and a furry male 4.6 Standard MSN conversation between You and Your mom 4.7 Standard MSN conversation between You and Captain Falcon 4.8 Standard MSN conversation between You and Captain Obvious 4.9 Standard MSN conversation between George Bush and Emo 4.10 Standard MSN conversation between Micheal Jackson and Random Little Boy 4.11 Standard Conversation between Your Mom and Anyone 4.12 Standard Conversation Between Me And You 4.13 Standard Conversation The lords and you

[edit] History

OMFG Tom shields is a tosspot, i hate him so much.. do u richard and ollie?

Widow's Mess -> MSN Messer -> Widow's Laxative Mess.

[edit] The Percentage Of MSN Users

• Keroro & Pluton - 100%
• Normal People - 9%
• Crazy psychos - 17%
• Ducks - 23%
• Satanists - 11%
• Bogans - 200%
• Dead people - 39%
• People that don't get enough sex - 90%
• Human - 35%
• People who work for Microsoft - 0%
• Spies - 78%
• Animals - 23%
• Aliens - 42%
• Single Moms - 51%
• Your mom - 34%
• Paedophiles - OVER 9000!!! Percent
• People who struggle with the concept of percentages - 764.3%
• People who don't give a shit about percentages - +/- 5826 %
• Teenage girls without boyfriends - 1%
• People without a life 4%
• People who like the name Luke 64%
• People who actually enjoy talking through the internet 0.1%

[edit] Flash! Flash!

When Satan's Secretary of Human Punishment (Dick Cheney) conducted a research to how an internet service could be as evil as the bowels of hell, he concluded that MSN really was a MSN (Massive Sex-oriented Network), and WLM continues to be WLM (Whorish Lamentation Media).Therefore, both Conservatives and Hippies have turned their backs on the service, claiming both "Sex should be for a sacred purpose!" (procreation) and "Sex should be for a.. a sacred purpose, mannnn!" (Midget loving, though some believe kitten huffing to be involved).The radical drop in use of the MSN or WLM services frightened Minisin to no end, while Gargole's Instant Masturbatory service sky-rocketed.

[edit] Side-Effects

Please note that the following side effects may be experienced when using MSN:

• Loss of mind
• Loss of life
• Loss of temper
• Loss of chance of loss of verginity. (Even if you've had sex).
• Any messages you may type to others can and will be checked by MSN and promptly not delivered to all recipients unless much promotion of the MSN corporation or it's affiliates is included is your message in it's entirety.
• Believing in every single chain mail message that some paedophile/moron/conservative christian sends you
• Waiting for Bill Gates to invent a pc you can have sex with
• Badly writing up lyrics from random rock songs into your MSN name

So please bear the following facts in mind when using MSN:

• Your computer/laptop cannot survive the drop out of your window, so try to refrain from throwing it there, and instead throw it somewhere safer.
• MSN reserves the right to screw you over as and when it feels like it, for its own amusement, or the amusement of its friends in order to look cool.
• Before using MSN, you must sign over your soul to the boss of the MSN corporation, in accordance with MSN's damnation decree.
• Never EVER call MSN the most evil product in the world, even though it is. Anything "most evil" falls under license of Torture Inc., the multinational corporation started by Saddam Hussein, which had a corporate takeover by Satan Industries since then, who now owns that, Apple, WIindows, and possibly Valve, allthough the latter is to be confirmed. Saddam reserves the right to endorse Torture Inc., and does it merrily.
• You should delete every single message you receive, even the ones that are not junk.
• You will experience a severe lack of friends.
• you will turn homosecksual gay

[edit] The Average MSN Conversation

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: sup

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: nmu

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: nm

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: k

• long pause*

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: brb

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: k lol

• after 10 miutes*

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: bak

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: k

0101Traces..::.23.001 says: g2g

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says: cya

$$$Brandogg=sex$$$ says:sht

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between a male and a female

• Female: holla
  
• Male: was up nigga
  
• Female: i feel horny?
• Male: ummm... are u drunk?( a big pause)....
• Female: no juss felling alone and horny? (with a heart smiley)
• Male: lets have computer sex
• long silence*
• Male: *With slightly more interest* do u hav a webcam?
• Female: yea baby, y?
• Male: can u turn it on plz?
• Female *Turns webcam on*
• Male: take your clothes off bb and get a lil closer to the cam
• long silence as Female tries to get comfortable for the male.
• Female *female shows part of breast and the male starts to jack off*
• Male *i juss had a big reaction

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between a male and a female who have not talked before

• Male: Hey there!
• Female: Hiya!
• Male: asl?
• Female: Umm... 15/f/AL
• Male: lol
• Male: were u live?
• Female: um...
• Male: lol i am 16/m/CA
• Female: lol
• Male: u got webcam?
• Male: ?
• Female: lol yeahh...
• Male: want to strip on cam
• Female: lol k
• Female strips for Male
• Male im done
• Male has disconnected

(Habachi is gay)

• Female Laughs

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between two male furries who haven't met

• Yiffsalot: Woof! ^^
• Merfy McMerfmerf: Yip! *Cuddles* ^^
• Yiffsalot: Wanna yiff?
• Merfy McMerfmerf: Sure!

Yiff Commences

[edit] Standard MSN Conversation between a regular male and a furry male

• Yiffyfox: Woof! Hi! ^^
• KT: ...
• Yiffyfox: Whassa matter? o.o *whines, pokes, and puts up a crying fox emoticon*
• KT: You are.
• Yiffyfo: How? *whinnies and puts his cock back in*
• KT: You're a furry.
• Yiffyfox: That's mean. *cries* You should learn to respect my beliefs! I was a beautiful wolf in my past life!
• KT: You're an idiot.
• Yiffyfox: OMG FURSECUTION!
• KT: *Disconnects from MSN*
• Yiffyfox: *Looks up cub porn*

[edit] Standard MSN conversation between You and Your mom

• Yo_momma0923: Hello darling.
• MeMyselfandI_933: Hi, err mom? You have MSN?
• Yo_momma0923: Of course darling.
• MeMyselfandI_933: Err... well ok
• Yo_momma0923: lets have computer sex
• MeMyselfandI_933: *With slightly more interest* do u hav a webcam?
• Yo_momma0923: yea baby, y?
• MeMyselfandI_933: can u turn it on plz?
• Yo_momma0923: *Turns webcam on*
• MeMyselfandI_933: take your clothes off bb and get a lil closer to the cam

1. long silence as your mum tries to get comfortable for you.
2. uour mum shows part of breast and you start to jack off*

• MeMyselfandI_933: *i juss had a big reaction

[edit] Standard MSN conversation between You and Captain Falcon

• You123: Hey Captain Falcon I Love to be...
• Captain_Falcon: FALCON PUNCH!
• You123: I was falcon punched!
• Captain_Falcon: FALCON PUNCH!
• You123: twice! YAY!
• Captain_Falcon: FALCON PUNCH
• You123: Ok That one hurt Alot Please Dont Do...
• Captain_Falcon: FALCON DEATH PUNCH
• You123: Arghhh.

[edit] Standard MSN conversation between You and Captain Obvious

• Captain_Obvious: Hi! I am talking to you!
• Punk_in_hell: Hey erm sup cap't?
• Captain_Obvious: I am on msn and u are asking me what i'm doing!
• Punk_in_hell: erm... riiigght.
• Captain_Obvious: Hey look! You just said "riiigght"
• Punk_in_hell: You're boring dude.
• Captain_Obvious: Hey! I'm not boring...
• Punk_in_hell: <sighs> Finally! You're not stating obvious facts
• Captain_Obvious: I am Captain Obvious!
• Punk_in_hell has signed out

[edit] Standard MSN conversation between George Bush and Emo

• George: hello
• John: Hey
• George: hows it going?
• John: Nm, hbu?
• George: oh u kno..
• John: No idk
• George: how do u run a country?
• John: WTF

[edit] Standard MSN conversation between Micheal Jackson and Random Little Boy

• Micheal Jackson: Holla
  
• Little Boy: My mommy said im not aloud to talk to strangers
• Micheal Jackson: dw im friends with ur mommy
• Little Boy: ok then
• Micheal Jackson: i feel horny?
• Little Boy: ummm... are u drunk?( a big pause)....
• Micheal Jackson: no juss felling alone and horny? (with a heart smiley)
• Little Boy: ok then...
• long silence*
• Micheal Jackson: do u hav a webcam?
• Little Boy: yeah, why?
• Micheal Jackson: can u turn it on plz?
• Little Boy *Turns webcam on*
• Micheal Jackson: take your clothes off bb and get a lil closer to the cam
• long silence as Little Boy tries to get comfortable for Micheal Jackson.
• Little Boy Little boy shows part of testicles and Micheal Jackson starts to jack off*
• Micheal Jackson *i juss had a big reaction

[edit] Standard Conversation between Your Mom and Anyone

• averageguy32542: sup!
• Your Mom: ooooooooooooooooh haii smexy boi wana haz sum SMEX?!?!?!?!?!?!!? oooooh im so fuken horney rite no w!!!!
• averageguy32542: ...

averageguy32542 has signed out

[edit] Standard Conversation Between Me And You

• AppleGirl: OMG HEY!!
• You: hi...
• AppleGirl: CALL ME MOTHER FUCKER JSUT FUCKING CALL ME
• You: O.O OKAY OKAY WHATS YOUR NUMBER
• AppleGirl: *** *** ****

End Conversation

[edit] Standard Conversation The lords and you

LORD DOOM says: 

Tomorrow dawns a new day for the rune. tomorrow you will witness my jack robot

Dan says: 

Shutup please unless it really will happen

LORD DOOM says: 

When you see jack tomorrow it won't really be him but a robot.

LORD DOOM says: 

It acts just like the human jack but trust me it is a robot

Dan: 

Whoa thats amazing. well i have no reason not to trust you, you are a trustworthy guy

LORD DOOM says: 

Beware he will attack you tomorrow and the real jack was never your friend.

v--