Islets of Langerhans

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The Isles of Langerhans are a small group of islands that are part of the Pan Creas Archipelago, and home to strange creatures simply not found anywhere else in the world.

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For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about Islets of Langerhans.

edit Geography

The isles are located in the Pan Creas Archipelago, between the continent of Stoam-Ack, and the island of Spleen, and just north of the sea of Vater. They are small, similarly shaped, and unusually stable, considering the tectonic activity of the neighboring continent of Stoam-Ack. The Isles themselves are volcanic in nature, and though eruptions do not happen often, they are always a possibility.

edit Population

The population of the Isles of Langerhan, though varied, are divided primarily into two tribes, the Exocrine and the Endocrine.

edit The Exocrine

The Amylasians, Chymotrypsinogenians, and Trypsinogenians are all members of the Exocrine tribe. This tribe is ruled by a council of three wise men(not to be confused with the ones associated with Original Jesus). Currently, they are Gastrin the Large, Cholecystokinin the Perceptive, and Secretin the Peacemaker. The Exocrine have a sphere of influence within the continent of Stoam-Ack which helps keep the Endocrine in check.

edit The Endocrine

The Insulinites, Glucagons, and Somatostatin make up the bulk of the Endocrine tribe, and they are the most prevalent in the Islets of Langerhans. They do not have any leaders, and spend much of their time combatting eachother, though, they live in peace with the Exocrine. This might be out of fear, as the Exocrine tribe is much larger than the Endocrine, and united. The Endocrine tribe does hold the advantage of having the ability of processing foods, and thereby many cooks, for both tribes, are from the Endocrine.

edit History

edit The Discovery

The Isles of Langerhans took their name from German Explorer Paul Langerhans, who discovered them in 1869. There were many heated debates as to who should own the islands, because though Germany discovered the islands, they weren't allowed to have it because they were naughty. It was left between the English and the French. The English caught a cold, so couldn't go, and the French were left to make their way to the Isles.

edit The Invasion

The French put off the natives immediately, leading to the Carcinoma of Pan Creas, where the French were sent home suffering from severe abdominal pain, loss of appetite, digestive problems, and depression from their resounding defeat.

Unfortunatley, Pan Creas did not come off lightly either with some 1% of Endrocrines (all Insulinites) being killed off to cries of "You ate too much sugar!".

edit The Treaty of Whipple

Whipple the Wise, a member of the Exocrine, negotiated with the French, to get them to leave them alone. Despite the fact that the Exocrine and Endocrine were able to expel the French from their Isles, both tribes recognized the need to reconcile with the larger, and more advanced nation. The Endocrine gave the French the cure for the poisons that they had used against them, and in exchange, the French agreed to protect the autonomy of the Isles of Langerhans, though they regretted the decision once they stopped suffering from depression, and thusly became depressed again, and spent much of their time pouting.

edit Present Day

The Isles of Langerhans today are much like they were years ago. Both tribes still await the coming of the Psuedocyst, their savior, who will take them to their lord Herophilus. The French have long since finished pouting(at least about the Isles of Langerhans), and fortunately for the tribes, no one else has expressed any desire to infringe on their autonomy. Occassionally, though, Endocrine chefs leave the islets, and are put to work in some of the finest eating establishments in the world, garnering much praise. One notable highlight is a much lauded dish consisting of a mash of syringe, lightly salted, topped with a stirfry of piglet-insul-in and injected directly into the stomach. This is usually follwed by a dessert of Jelly Beans.

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