From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

Chuck Norris giving the famous roundhouse kick to the Mak-Daddy

A highly Stylized and celebrated form of mind-to-hand combat, Lukewando was first introduced when the master, aka "Luke the Mak-Daddy", was brought to this planet, and materialized when a Tai-Kwando master head butted a little known particle, Luke32.

edit Origins

When materializing as this perfect being he seemed a normal human, except for the fact he materialized out of no where. He spent his days watching the Tai-Kwando masters train and practice their art against each other. One day the Master challenged one of the Tai-Kwando masters. The Tai master threw a stunning kick and hit the Mak-Daddy in the chest sending him flying. This enraged the Mak-Daddy and soon began to do one of his moves known as "the windmill" his arms were flailing at an incredible speed (these speeds are known to turn small babies into grown men) the tai master could not block fast enough and was pummelled into a fine powder.

edit Challengers

Many masters of other arts have challenged the Mak-Daddy to fights but have only failed. The Mak-Daddy is also known for moves such as "The Kick to the Face" which doesn’t actually hit your face or any other part of your body at all but instead comes so close your mind cannot comprehend it and promptly explodes. Mak-Daddy has only known one person who can beat him. This person goes by the name of Chuck Norris. When asked why he does not challenge Chuck? He replied "Don't Fuck with Chuck!". The Lukewando is a true spectacle of beauty, grace and random moves that seem to be more made up on the spot then practiced and rehearsed.

edit Formula for destruction

Luke32+Tai-K(wando)=Pwnage of all n00bs in vicinity


-A rare element that is only know to reside in the Mak-Daddy himself and has not been found any where else, except for trace amounts left in Oscar Wilde's many sexual conquests.

2.Wando of Tai-Kwando

-a form of martial arts used primarily in the suspension of opponent(ial) advancement

edit The Naming

Coining the Term "Lukewando" was a demanding, back-breaking task for good ol' Luke, but it was met with the highest of expectations and vigor.

edit Mount Doom

Deep within the blazing fires of Mount Doom, Luke duked it out with Lord Voldemort and... let's just say... things got ugly.

After roughly a year of intense mind-to-hand combat, Luke was at the brink of defeat. Bent on one knee, breathing heavily, and gripping his chest, Luke slowly raised his head from his shoulders to look his maker dead-on...and uttered "It's time for some Lukewando." This spontaneous coinage was the beginning of the highly celebrated name.

edit The Battle

A sparkle in his eye, Europe's "FINAL COUNTDOWN" blaring from an unknown location in the background, and bent on rage, Luke mustered every ounce of man-power he ceased to withhold and let loose this reign of havoc upon Voldemort. Luke emerged from the ashes of mount Doom days later, bloody, broken, coughing blood here and there, and trudged 3000 miles back to his home-town, met with great praise from the village people..literally the village people, you know, the ones that dance around and sing YMCA. Furthermore, Luke was praised for his courageous act of courage and after his death in 1AD, a statue was erected in his name with the quote "It's time for some Lukewando" engraved upon it by the Tai-Kwando Masters for future generations to live by his brave, earnest example.

Now, you may be pondering to yourself "Don't these two explanations contradict one-another?" And I answer you this, you are pondering this to yourself in a dark, dark corner of your twisted imagination, and it doesn't matter what you think;)

edit Further Info

Personal tools