Lords of Acid

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Lords of Acid.
“I love to get my booty spanked.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Lords of acid

Lords of Acid are a mutant band from Scandanavia. Their music is a mixture of electro and sex, which explains why their songs are usually just recordings of the band members having orgies. 90% of all songs are so sexually explicit that playing it may cause all people listening to go into wild sex mode and sex up anyone around. One of their more famous songs, "Spank my Booty," was said to cause even the most frigid bitch, Martha Stewart, to have sex with a goat. Their name is rumored to be a homage to trani acid.

edit Members

  • Oliver Twist - Synthesizers, condom carrier (1888-present)
  • Wim Daans (AKA Shait Dell La Lunacy) - Spanking, booty calling (193B.C.-present)
  • Maurice Engelen (AKA KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!) oral, spanking, hawt surpise buttsecks ( 2008- present)
  • Erhan Kurkun - (B)ass (1994-present)
  • Kurt Liekens Cock (Get it? LIEKens cock? Ah, fuck you guys) (AKA McGuinness draft) - Donkey punching (1993-present)
  • Deborah Ostrega - Oral, more Oral, bukkake (1998-present)

the group having their daily bondage meeting

edit Discography

  • 1- Anal sex with the messiah
  • 1776- Liberate my vagina
  • 1925- Mein Cunt
  • 1969- First Man in my Ass
  • 2006- Future Sex (With a Robot)

edit Early years

The band started in a factory in Scandinavia. Two scientists were testing a new Viagra that would allow a man to have sex for two months straight. Unfortunately a freak accident caused the waste products to fall onto passing hobos. This caused them to transform into the band Lords of Acid, hence their name. They found that the acid had given them new-found sexual abilities, and they could make a band too. Their first album, I Sit on Acid, contained a ballad of a woman who had married an ass man. Needless to say, the album was a big hit with the public. Soon they made their second album, Lust, which made them nearly a world wide phenomenon.

edit Later years

One of their more famous albums, Pussy, was noted for it's tale of a man looking for a cat for his wife but later finds out she had one all the time, and they ended the story with both man and wife petting the kitty. They also realesed a single called "I Must Increase my Bust," which sang about how we should all by busts of ourselves, and large ones at that. The song caused a lot of conflict with younger women, as they could not afford to increase their bust size, and felt the song was pressuring them to do so. The band did not make a public apology, and instead, they sang the song more.

edit Anti-apology

The anti apology thus caused a riot in the streets on april 26 1992. During all of this the band made a new song, "Rough Sex" which inturn gave them the ABC's of kinky sex, which listed the ABC's as follows.

  • A is for asphyxiation, you won't catch your breath
  • B is for the blindfold, that keeps you dark as death
  • C is for your cockwich that I squash beneath my shoe/While I watch you wiggle, and I laugh at you (ha ha)
  • D is for my dildo that you will learn to blow
  • E is for your enema, I control the flow
  • F is for my flogger, I whip you so violent
  • G is for the gag in place to keep your screaming silent
  • H is for humiliation that you must bear
  • I will immobilize you in my sexual lair
  • J is for your jizzy, jerking tendency
  • K for kisses,
  • L for love and licks you offer me
  • M is for the manacles imprisoning your feet
  • N is for your nelly little nimby so sweet
  • O is for the O-rings, holding you in place
  • P is for the perspiration dripping down your face
  • Q is for the quirk I use to whip your eager ass
  • R is for restraints, to make the magic last
  • S is for sweet suffering that only you will know
  • T is for the torment, that keeps you on the go
  • U is for unbridled lust that only I control/As I claim for my own your body, mind, and soul
  • V is for the vicious urge to struggle in vain/While I tease and tantalize you and eroticize your pain
  • W is where, a winding woman walks
  • X is for excruciating X-rated talk
  • Y is you the yo-yo; I yank upon your string/Watch you yell and holler from the pleasure that it brings
  • Z is for the zestfulness with which you will submit/Now I’ve taught you every letter so remember all of it

The song was a hit with the fetish community, and they were back on #1

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