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“Open latte”

~ Starbucks on latte

“Thanks a latte”

~ Everybody on thanking Starbucks for being Open Latte

Latte from the greek λάττε meaning 'drink of the chotch'. It is an extremely delicious drink, and is best served with a biscotti, while laughing at the poor. Oi its the englishmen mate.

Latte's often have pretty pictures hand-crafted by master-artists. These pictures are responsible for the drinkers dilemma--drink the 19 euro coffee or admire the pretty picture?

[edit] History

Founded in the mid-19th century as another way to mark oneself as a true gentleman, and bon vivant. Lattes were comonly known as 'regular,' 'hot,' or 'full body;' and were sold at a Starbucks gentlemen's coffeeshop.

[edit] Latte

[edit] Ingredients

A latte is made from:

• One part Espresso
• One part sunshine
• One part disposable income
• Steamed Milk
• Sugar may also be used
• The eaten half of a McDonald's Cheeseburger
• a chotch
• fermented breast milk
• crushed hopes and dreams of 3rd class nations
• balls
• capitalist exploitation
• a fresh umbilical cord

Some People add chocolate, or other cruel and bizarre flavorings. These people don't deserve to live, and should be socially segregated and/or murdered. or have their chotch removed.

[edit] Serving

Ideally, the latte should be served in the skull of your enemies, but accounting for the modern trend and general impracticality of using skulls as cups you may use a selection from IKEA. Same difference.

Lattes may be put in epipens and injected into thumbs for maximum latte pleasure.

[edit] Food

Biscotti is the first choice, however after mating a bran muffin will suffice.

[edit] Culture

Lattes are part of a rich and interesting culture. Make sure the rest of the people in the coffee shop are aware of this when you order. When ordering a latte is is best to use an Italian phrases, even if they don't make sense. This will make you seem very erudite.

Chai lattes are only for clinically ill hippies.

[edit] How to Drink

Place to mouth. Open mouth. Drink. Self-indulgent laughter. Clean up any premature ejaculant.

[edit] Side Effects

• Bankruptcy
• Sterility
• Hyperactivity
• Being a douchebag