Kittenolivia
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
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| Motto: "MMMMMMM...mice" | |||||
| National anthem: "The Meow Mix theme song" | |||||
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| Official language | Cat's Meow, Lolcat | ||||
| Capital | Sparta | ||||
| Largest City | GIANT BOWLSSSSSSSSS! | ||||
| Population | 80,800,000 | ||||
| Government | Krytocracy and Constitutional monarchy | ||||
| Emperor | Fidel Catro | ||||
| Prime Minister | Creampuff | ||||
| National Heroes | Garfield, Egypt | ||||
| Formation | –National Foundation Day by Ancient Kittenolivia — June 21, 100 BC –Kåtji Reformation — November 28, 900 AD | ||||
| Independence | – From Cat Nation's fall – From France, 1945 | ||||
| Currency | ₯ | ||||
| Religion | self-worship, Kittenanity, mouse sacrifice, human/moogle sacrifice, fish sacrifice, Cat-tholic | ||||
| National Sports | getting huffed, puking, hurl kittens, chasing strings. | ||||
“I still have the scars.”
“In Soviet Russia, Kittenolivia visits YOU!!”
The Holy Empire of Kittenolivia is a former Yugoslav Republic located in Central America. It is the first country ever to have destroyed the moon. Kittenolivia frequently plans successful assassinations on celebrities and soccer moms, supports international peace-keeping missions, terrorist activities, child obesity and kitten-huffing addiction. Kittenolivia went to war with Mars. Currently, they are in a "cold war" against fellow kitten kin Cat Nation and an intergalactic war against the Dog Star, their dreaded enemies the Dog must be destroyed. Those butt-smelling, self-licking, toilet water drinking overgrown rats.
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edit Exports
Kittenolivia makes a lot of its money from its exports. Its main export is Catnip. Catnip is the main one because kittens are the best at making it. Kittens like Catnip so much that they have discovered ways to make the side affects super effective. Also, in Kittenolivia, Catnip isn't illegal so they don't have to pretend to be trying to stop the production of Catnip in their Country. They mass produce this so much because kittens love catnip and they want a lot of catnip. Toy mice are their other export. Toy mice here are mass produced so that kittens and the people they export to can play with toy mice.
edit History
In 1422, a world renowned conqueror from France who was named Justin Bieber conquered Kittenolivia in just Over 9000! seconds. The highly flammable kittens took a dump on Justin Bieber and he got brain damage from the battle. Nevertheless, Kittenolivia was conquered but the kittens enslaved the helpless human/moogle/viera conquerers. The kittens used them for cheap labor and in turn the slaves go to huff the kittens.
edit The Kittenolivian Revolution
In 1945, nothing was happening and everyone was really bored because nobody had made a decent pie in years. Quite frankly, the kittens got sick of it, unleashed an army of grue allies on their smelly, short, wrinkly French conquerors. Underestimating the power of kittens in numbers, the French were devoured by the kittens in so little time that nobody found out about it.
edit Kittenolivian Wars
In 1742, the United States of America went to war with Kittenolivia, igniting the long lasting The War on Cute, Kitten War and Human vs. Kitten War. Obviously, the kittens won easily after turning the tables on the Americans by huffing the foolish humans/moogles/vieras. The current USA president himself, Ronnie Reagan was huffed and he never returned to the way he was =)
The long bloody war saw absolutely NO blood. Instead, warfare consisted of both sides continually taking huge shits in the enemy's water supply. This was a bad strategy for the US as, as we all know, every single AMERICAN is constipated (plus Weegee's conversion, the kittens had him in handy & magical ❦). The kittens, who never stop shitting, won a glorious victory. Kittenolivian War hero Catatürk proudly proclaimed at the end of the war "the glory of our victory and our talented dumping is shown in that we will never be as full of shit as the constipated Americans." There was a lot of blood.
edit See Also
- Dog Star (their natural enemies).
- Cat Nation (their territorial rivals).
- Catspace
- Cat-tholic
- Cat
- Kitten
- Cat Cocaine
- Kitten Huffing
- Catalonia
- Rupert's Land
- Empire of Antarctica
- Empire of the Four Squares
- Kitten hurling battle
 | Central America and South America |
| Central: Belize | Costa Rica | El Humidor | Guatemala | Honduras | Kittenolivia | Nicaragua (en español) | Panama | Panama Canal Zone | |
| South: Argentina (en español) | Bolivia | Brazil (em português) | Republic of Bulimia | Cat Nation | Catspace | Chile (en español) | Colombia (en español) | Easter Island | Ecuador (en español) | Falkland Islands | French Guiana | Galapagos Islands | Guyana | Locombia | Paraguay | Peru (en español) | Seahorsia | Suriname | Uruguay (en español) | Vergüenzuela (en español) |
| Countries and territories of North America | |
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Sovereign states
Main: Atlantic: United Kingdom of Britannia and Northern Pangaea | Amerigo
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