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Kim Possible is an American animated television series about a teenage crime fighter who has the task of dealing with worldwide, family, and school issues every day.
It remains, sadly, the longest running Disney Channel Original Series airing for 5 years and 3 months.
In the show, the two teen protagonists (known as Kick Assp) travel the world and their own United States to spread the black flag of anarchy. A typical "mission" may involve blowing up oil rigs, having anal sex on the deck of battleships , inciting rebel uprisings in third-world countries, assassinating corporate or government officials, dealing drugs, praising Stalin, and/or attempting to cause mass hysteria by revealing the truth about 9/11 (Jaws did WTC). Because being a terrorist these days is serious business, the characters operate under the pseudonyms Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable. Their true identities are never revealed in the show. In two episodes, though, she tries to rape her two brothers and molest Wade.
- Kim's Voice Actor: Christy Carlson Romano was the only voice capable of capturing the gritty atmosphere of this ABC Kids program. Christy's voice is sped up 50x to give the inclution that a girl is speaking. In some episodes, you can hear Christy shaving and burning boos during the recording session. Christy is usually too drunk to say exactly what the script wants, but she gets it close enough to have been on the show it's entire run.
- Ron Voice Actor: Ron is usually voiced by whoever was standing outside the recording studio at the time. The janitor, Ben Chowderson, has been Ron most of the series. Other people who have been Ron include: little girls, tour groups in unison, and the president of Disney, and every living president of the United States (Even the Jewish ones).
- Shego's Voice Actor: Ellen Degeneres. Who knew?
- Kim Possible: The ultimate herald of the anarchist cause and a chronic but Sexy failure. She grew up in the projects in the bad part of Middleton. Her charismatic father, a janitor at the space museum, was murdered before the start of the show and her mother was an alcoholic all through Kim's childhood. After failing to manage decent grades or join the cheer squad, she still managed to bottle up her angst and turmoil until high school, when she suddenly exploded in a fit of violence and rage, which we later learn is because of her pregnancies. No matter how much her teachers told her to "just be herself," she still couldn't get her act together. She has since devoted her life to bringing down the Man. One act of civil disobedience being her not wearing a bra, revealing pointy breasts. She is in a relationship with Shego which she keeps secret because society would burn her alive in a church if they discovered that she's a lesbian. Her favorite hobby, "fun times", does include girls between the ages of 14 to 17. Her belly button is pierced, but Disney refuses to admit that.
- Ron Stoppable: Kim Possible's best friend, and, from the fourth season, her boyfriend (he doesn't know about Shego, lol). He's one of those wanna-be hippies that burns incense, smokes marijuana, and wears a tie-dye shirt every now and then, but you can tell he isn't a real hippy because all the other hippies hate him. An utter failure in all aspects of life, including losing a hot girlfriend to another woman without even knowing it. His favorite hobby includes stalking Kim Possible and spanks it (possibly Kim has already noticed that...the poor bastard).
- Rufus: Ron Stoppable's pet pit bull. He is similar to Courage the Cowardly Dog, except less of a pussy. He is frequently used as deus ex machina, usually by bailing his owner's sorry ass out of trouble. Ron thinks he can speak but it is the drug-use and constant fits of paranoia.
- W4d3 L04D: aka, WIDE LOAD. Kim's website administrator and technology supplier. When he isn't helping Kim and crew break into CTU (ten points for rhyming), he can be found chatting with fellow commies on IRC, hijacking radio and television frequencies to spread communist propaganda,and coding open source software. Also, eating a lot and rapping to Sean Kingston.
- Mr. and Mrs. Possible: Little is known about Kim's father, as he died before the events of the show's pilot episode, though Kim does have occasional flashbacks which reveal Mr. Possible as a Lenin-like father figure, despite being a janitor. The widowed Mrs. Possible is just an overweight, broken down drunk, and is rarely seen on the show, though when she is she either overdosed or passed out on the couch.
- Jim and Tim Possible: The perpetually hungry, neglected brothers of Kim Possible. They suffer abuse from both their mother and Kim herself, and tend to fend for themselves by mooching food from their few friends. They would rather live in a dumpster outside than face their sister's torment. In normal circumstances, they wo?uld be geniuses, but they're only fed cat food, so... In the episode "The Possibles Lose Again", one of them (I forget which) was eaten by Wade.
- '"MoNique Johnson"': A friend of Kim's who is a rapper and is addicted to The Office, she and Kim bonded in Juvi since she was throw in and called a"lazy sack". She comes on missions but is always drunk. She's dated Kim's brothers and is Shego's ex-girlfriend. She is seen watching Kim and Ron make out and canmbe seen spotted and potted behind a tree or bush and once in Kim's trunk.
- Shego: A skilled assassin and soldier of fortune, as well as Kim's clandestine lesbian lover. Her motives appear to be monetary, as she hires herself out to whoever will pay the most, which is usually Dr. Drakken. Her combat skills do not match Kim's, but it's not like she's trying, anyway. She is the co-author of the 9 book series, The Encyclopedia of Machete Battles, and used to be the lead singer of Team Go. Shego has converted to cannibalism after her recent break up with Robo-cop, she is now Jewish too.
- Kim's Neighbors: Kim's neighbors are the Perfects. The mom is a sexy brain surgeon and the dad is a rocket scientist with the catchphrase "Everything is Perfect for a Perfect". In the show, they were voted Middleton's Best Family Who Isn't Mormon. Although they've never done anything wrong, or even disagreeable, Kim and all the viewers agreed that they should be killed with extreme prejudice. In the first last movie ("Holy Shit!!"), Kim, while totally whacked out on PCP, believed that she cannibalized one of the three Perfect children. Unfortunately, we find out (in ep 68, "The Possibles Lose Again") that it turned out not to be one of the Perfect children, but one of Kim's brothers. Oh well.
- Dr. Drakken: A well-known, powerful, yet inept arms dealer. Although he poses little threat to Team Possible, he angered them with his tight business connections with the U.S. military. He is Team Possible's main antagonist, and sports a weird looking mullet.
- Monkey Fist: An all-around hippy bastard. He is a devout pagan who attempted to become more in-tune with nature by hiring a geneticist to modify his DNA so he could become like a monkey. He frequently clashes with Team Possible because of his perception that they are disrupting the balance of nature. He despises Ron Stoppable because of Ron's status as a poser hippy.
- Dr. Dementor: Dr. Jens Demens (aka Dr. Dementor) is a descendent of Dr. Josef Mengele, a Nazi scientist. Hitler made it his dying wish that Dementor be kept alive into the present day to continue his work. While Dementor still has a couple million more Jews to go to live up to his predecessors, he is trying his best. Because fascism and anarchism are decidedly opposed ideologies (we're smart, by the way), Team Possible and Dr. Dementor clash frequently.
- Bonnie RockWallClimber: The local school slut who antagonizes Kim day in and day out only to cover up for her lesbian desire for her, which she takes out on the rest of the cheer leading team.
- Eric Cartman: Eric, the hater of Jews and Gingers, has been plotting Kim's death throughout the series. Kim's success, in spite of being a ginger, has driven Eric to the brink of insanity. He has tried to gas, burn, hang, impale and boil Team Possible. In the last episode, he threw Kim a Chili-Con Carnival (Note: the absence of Kim's parents).
|Season||Ep#||Ep Title||Synopsis||Fun Fact|
|1||1||Squished (Pilot)||The first episode aired. Team Possible learns of a plot by Drakken to rip off some anime by building giant robots and selling them to the U.S. military. Kim goes and kicks his ass. This episode features the first appearance of Joshua Mankey (who´s secretly a pokemon, and gay), Kim's intermittent love interest and the object of some terrible puns. (Quit mankeying around!)||You mean there are puns in this series?|
|1||6||McDonalds||One of the most violent episodes in the series. Ron gets a job at McDonalds and Kim gets pretty pissed at him. She plans to get revenge by throwing a Molotov cocktail through the drive-through window while he's on duty. He escapes, but soon after that a ruptured gas line explodes and destroys everything in a three-block radius. Afterwards, Kim and Ron learn the value of friendship and loyalty while in a lengthy shootout with the local police.||Action heroes always talk about their personal lives while in the middle of shoot-outs (see Mission KimPossible III).|
|1||18||Animal Attraction||There's a personality quiz that's taken over the projects, and Kim finds out she's a black scorpion. It becomes the symbol of her assault on law and order.||According to the title, this episode should be about sOmEtHiNg ElSe, but it isn't.|
|2||34-36||Dial "T" For Time Travel||This is the first Kim Possible movie. Team Possible travel through time to see all their friends and enemies as older folks. Shego has assassinated most of the world just because she could, and has become President. Murder, instead of a crime, is now enforced by law. In spite of that, Kim still wants total anarchy and gets in a big ol' battle with Shego. Shego wins by sending Kim back in time to where she started.||Time travel and murder are both fun concepts. This movie put them together. Ron gets his first sex change.|
|2||41||Go Team Go||This episode introduces Team Go, a particularly dreadful punk rock band that Shego used to perform vocals for. The band had languished ever since Shego quit, so the members of Team Go go to great lengths to convince her to rejoin. This episode features guest appearances by Yoko Ono and Ember of Danny Phantom fame.||As far as band names go, punk rock bands usually have the worst.|
|3||53||Emotion Sickness||One of the most popular episodes among fans and wankers. One day, Kim accidentally injects a sex drive stimulant into her bloodstream, mistaking it for heroin. Kim kisses almost every character in the show in this episode, leading many insane bastards to try to use it as proof that their bizarre shipping fantasies stand on any sort of basis other than overactive hormones.||Hey kids, Kim does drugs and she turned out pretty okay.|
|3||63 - 65||Holy Shit!!||The series finale, which takes its title from Kim's favorite catch phrase. It's basically a two-hour-long version of "Squished" except with more sex and giant robots, and Kim eats one of her brothers thinking it was her neighbor. Disney and their counterparts in Soviet Russia decided to renew the show for another season "out of respect for our loyal fans," but everyone knows that they just did it for the money because they're capitalist pigs and sellouts.||No one's a real communist anymore. Even the Russians are posers.|
|4||66||Clothes Minded||Kim learns that certain female members of a local anarchist group have sold out and shopped at Victoria's Secret. She kicks their asses real good.||Seriously though, which person's ass hasn't Kim kicked real good? -|
|4||77||Stop Team Go||Another fine episode that pleases wankers. Team Go finally convinces Shego to rejoin the band. Although Shego's renewed membership is short-lived, it involves her wearing a schoolgirl outfit during the performances. Daaaay-um.||Shego is the fun fact here, wink wink nudge nudge.|
|4||87 - 88||The End of the Series Movie||The series finale, which includes every KP adversary and most of the known and unknown weapons ever devised. Kim gets shot at the end. Oh, did you like that ending? No? WELL TOO BAD, JACKASS. Disney is rumored to continue the series with a secret plot twist.||The series ends forever again.|
Kim Possible has garnered huge criticism from crusty old hags, like Adrian & John Lam and the Republican Party because of its heavy adult content and radical political themes. One episode, which depicted a cannibalism by Kim, got the old bastards particularly upset, even though it was animated. The show carries an NC-17 rating in America, leading some to question why Disney, a company known for a tradition of child-friendly material and family values, picked it up in the first place. Disney responded by telling them to, quote, SHUT THE FUCK UP. The "Kim Movue Extravaganza"'s plot was stolen by the creators of the movie "Salt".
Kim Possible has been criticized and boycotted by the American Society for Family Values for its "sexualized" animation style. From the start of the show, parents were complaining about Kim's character as "an example of the glorification of breasts" and the producers decision to air an episode where Ron steps out of a bathroom completely naked with his 11 inch cock visible.
Kim Possible has won various awards including in 2004 the Amnesty International OH NO YOU DI'NT award for the episode Torture Your Neighbors, Kids!. It won the People's Choice Award in 2005 for Best Sound Editing, which sounds important, but it really isn't. Clips from the show have been featured in Osama Bin Laden's weekly variety show, and the Pakistani version of Disney's "House of Mouse". Kim's dilapidated house is featured as a hidden unlockable map in Gears of War.
- ↑ Patriot Act, 2001