From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Kepner-Tregoe, Inc. is a management services company headquartered in New Jersey. It provides consultation and training to companies in various industries. It does these companies the favor of accepting hefty consulting fees so that the companies don't have to park their money offshore to wait for United States tax policy to get a clue.
The company was founded in 1958 by former RAND Corporation researchers Hans Kepner and Fritz Tregoe. They are best known for their Procrastinational Analysis technique, described in the book The Dithering Manager, and the best-selling sequels Son of Dithering Manager and Return to Dithering Manager.
The firm has 13 offices, serving 18 countries, and serving the remaining 179 countries by being somewhere else.
edit Initial research
The RAND Corporation had a consulting contract to improve the effectiveness of U.S. Air Defense against a variety of simulated attacks, from spitwads to pie-throwing contests to full-fledged food fights in the office cafeteria. For 6 months, Kepner and Tregoe watched how groups of people processed incoming information from pairs of individuals known to be trolls.
They noticed a difference in the speed and nature of their subjects' responses. They concluded that "some people were better than others at dealing with situations" and that "the more of our books they buy, the better still they will be at it, probably."
Kepner and Tregoe interviewed managers and asked them to identify good and poor decision-makers. They found that those identified as good decision-makers were actually horrible but tended to compliment the manager on his necktie, ignore the food stains on it, and act deliriously happy over every mediocre performance review. They concluded that greater awareness of sucking up in the decision-making process would let decision-makers improve their performance and improve the performance of others.
A widely recognized examination can be taken in Kepner-Tregoe, and upon passing it, the tested subject will be certified as an expert in the field, or in subfields such as credulity.
edit Kepner-Tregoe analysis
Kepner-Tregoe analysis refers to a process of weighing alternatives. It postpones decisions until the manager can put on airs about having given "due consideration" to everything. One assigns a numerical weight to a series of values, gives each alternative a numerical rating according to each value, and computes a score for the alternative. If the result is bullshit, the manager changes the numbers and tries again. If the manager misplaces his calculator, then under Kepner-Tregoe analysis, he can use this as an excuse for not making a decision.